Adulteress Love Child
by Kachelle486
Summary: What if Meredith turns out to be pregnant in 3x04? How will she deal with Finn/Derek and how will she manage being an intern with a baby on the way?
1. Chapter 1

Auther's Note; Hey Guys! I'm back with a new story! So I know where I want to go with this story and I've finally got a semi-free schedule so I can start writing again. I have been wanting to do a story like this one for a while, pregnant Mer is probably my favorite to write and there is going to be a lot of fun in writing this story! Unexpected things of course, this is going to have some MerDer fluff along the way but I want to try and portray Meredith as she was in season 3 so there is still dark and twisty Meredith. I really hope you guys enjoy this story!

* * *

 _Chapter I_

 _Do I wanna know?_

 _Have you got color in your cheeks_

 _Do you ever get that fear_

 _That you can't shift the tide_

 _The type that sticks around like something's in your teeth_

 _And some aces up your sleeve_

* * *

Meredith's eyes shot open, hearing the alarm blaring next to her ear. She let out a groan, pushing her face into her pillow. Her body warm and aroused by the dream she awoke from. It had been the third that week, she seriously needed to make her choice already. She got the energy to sit up, suddenly feeling the room spinning as she sat back down on the edge of the bed.

She realized that her alarm was set later than normal, she quickly got over the sudden nausea as she rushed to the bathroom. She didn't have time to get sick, not now. She grabbed the closest shirt that looked clean and pair of jeans, pulling them over her naked skin. She couldn't keep her mind off the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. She went through her symptoms in her head as she searched the house for something, anything to relieve the nausea.

Headache, nausea, fatigue, and slight dizziness could be signs of anything from a bad migraine to an ulcer. She noticed no one was home, not even Izzie. She felt bad for Izzie of course but glad that something finally made Izzie get out. She kept running through scenarios of what could be wrong with her, finally just chopping it up to an ulcer. She grabbed the Pepto Bismol from the medicine cabinet, rushing out the door with barely enough time to spare.

A wash of relief ran over her when she arrived at the hospital with enough time to change into her scrubs and not get on scut for being late yet again. She grabbed her tote, rushing through the light drizzle that fell from the sky and into the hospital. She made her way up to the locker room, finding George just arriving also. She put her tote into her locker along with her rain coat, searching for the Pepto Bismol. She finally found it, tipping it against her lips and taking a large gulp and shivering slightly at the taste.

"So Izzie left the house this morning," George spoke finally, pulling his scrub top over his bare skin. Alex just coming into the locker room also, rushing to get into his scrubs.

"You OK?" George noted how she sat down slowly on the bench, gripping the bottle of pink liquid tightly.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" she questioned, taking another sip of the thick pink liquid that coated her throat as it went down.

"Because you are drinking that like it's candy," he let out an awkward laugh before grabbing his stethoscope.

"Oh, yeah. Just not feeling myself," she closed the bottle of medicine before slipping it back into her locker and quickly changing into her scrubs.

"O'Malley seems to have that effect on women, just ask Torres," he snorted, changing into his scrubs just as quickly as Meredith.

"What is that suppose to mean?" George questioned, staring at Alex dumbfounded.

"Would you both stop it," Meredith rolled her eyes, pulling on her white coat. She sat back down on the bench as another wave of nausea hit her.

"It means you threw Torres out on her ass," Alex continued to aggravate George.

"I did not, who told you that?" he said again, confused by how he knew all of this.

"Torres," Alex smirked, causing George to almost freak out. He grabbed his white coat, slamming his locker before rushing out of the locker room.

"Come on," Bailey shouted as she stuck her head into the locker room, Meredith tried to ignore the sick feeling in her stomach as she followed Bailey out along with Alex. They followed her as she walked down the hall, sounding annoyed just by the way she mumbled under her breath.

"Let's go people, I've been in surgery since 2am, I am in no mood," she yelled as they passed by George.

"George," Meredith whispered as she passed by him, hoping to get his attention for him to follow. He finished talking to Callie before quickly catching up to Bailey with Cristina suddenly showing up as they went into the corridor.

"No cutting!" Cristina said as she straightened her white coat, trying to walk faster than George.

"Yang, you're late!" Alex snickered behind Bailey, drawing attention to the fact that Cristina had just arrived.

"Hey, so is George," she tried to pull the attention off her.

"I was here," he corrected her as they all followed behind an annoyed Bailey.

Meredith got distracted by the fact that she felt like she was feeling like she could pass out at any moment. Her head was spinning, her stomach turning, and she couldn't handle the bickering between the pair. She suddenly had to stop, feeling like her insides were about to spew from her mouth.

"Woman troubles?" Cristina said, stopping along side Meredith.

"Ugh, men troubles, I think this dating two guys thing is really getting to me," she murmured, trying to slow her breathing. She felt nauseated by a smell coming from one of the rooms they had just passed.

"McDreamy and the vet are making you sick?" she questioned, not completely believing what her person was saying. Meredith knew Cristina knew that she wasn't just fine.

"I just need to make a choice," Meredith finally said and got her footing back as they tried to catch up with everyone else. They turning into one of the patients rooms, an older gentleman. Meredith couldn't focus on anything that Bailey or George said about the patient. She was glad when they left the room, getting a small break before they had to do something else.

"Dr. Grey, you alright?" Bailey said partially sarcastic, putting the patient's chart along with the other charts.

"Yeah Dr. Bailey, just..." she sat down on one of the chairs against the wall, feeling like she was about to pass out from the mix of loud chatter, her stomach doing flips, and a slight musty smell coming from somewhere. She looked up, watching as Derek came down the corridor toward her.

"need to make a choice," she finished her earlier statement, looking at the ground as Derek approached her. Her symptoms were only getting worse, she needed something stronger to make her feel better.

"Dr. Grey, I am clipping a basiler tip aneurysm, any interest?" he tried to sound charming as he wanted her to scrub in on the surgery with him. She looked up at him momentarily, noting as Addison passed by them to the nurses station. Things still seemed tense between them, why wouldn't they be? It had been six weeks since the prom. Six Weeks.

"Dr. Bailey can I..." Addison started before looking up into the conference room. The sight in front of her almost made her jump out of her skin and run for the hills.

"Oh my god," she muttered, causing everyone to look up at what she was talking about.

"My god," Derek said, anger lined in his voice. Meredith didn't even bother looking up, she didn't care what everyone else was concerned with.

"Oh my god," She said, trying to control her stomach. She pulled they hair out of her face, trying to fan cool air toward her. She couldn't puke, not in front of everyone.

"McSteamy," Cristina smirked, looking at Mark Sloan standing there.

Meredith couldn't handle it anymore and suddenly the only thing in her stomach made it's way up and she leaned over and allowed it to empty all over the floor in front of her. Derek was by her side in an instant, rubbing between her shoulder blades as she leaned against his touch. She didn't care that everyone had just seen her barf.

"No Mr Sullivan! Don't light that!" George yelled and there was loud gasp heard around and a large flash of light coming from the patient's room. Everyone rushed in to help the man who had just lit his face on fire, except Derek.

"Are you ok?" He whispered into her ear, not worried about the other man that had just almost caught. She nodded, not wanting to open her mouth and more come out.

"Come on, let's go get you some water," he said, offering his hand to help her up. She took his hand, getting up on her own. He put his hand on the small of her back, leading her toward one of the break rooms on that floor. He wanted to make sure she was alright, hoping that she wasn't too terribly sick.

She felt comforted, relaxing at his touch. She didn't care they were on the hospital, she was sick and all she wanted to do was curl up in bed but she couldn't. She was an intern, interns don't take sick days. She walked closer to him as they entered the break room, breaking away from his touch to sit down on one of the chairs. She watched as he filled a cup with ice water, thankful he was here. She took the cup from his, guzzling down half the cup. She welcomed the cold liquid, the smell of Derek's aftershave seemed to calm her stomach.

"I'm fine Derek," she lied after putting the cup down. She had to get back to work soon.

"Meredith," he started, reaching his hand up and placing it on her forehead, "you have a slight temperature, you are not fine."

"Come on Derek, it's just I got nauseated by someone's smell. I'm alright, see?" She said, standing up. She felt a little dizzy but stood on her own two feet successfully. Her stomach still felt uneasy but it was getting better now she had the relief.

"Mer, what happened?" Cristina asked as she burst into the break room.

"Nothing Cristina, I just got sick. I am fine now," she pointed out the fact she could walk fine but she really wasn't alright. She still felt weak an dizzy, maybe she needed to get some food in her system.

"Are you sure?" Derek asked, standing close to her just in case she felt weak or sick again. He felt like he needed to protect her, he knew that she wasn't really fine but he couldn't fight her on this matter.

"Yes Derek," she said annoyed, leaving the break room with Cristina and Derek closely following her. She managed to make it to the nurses station alright, leaning against the edge of it.

"Derek, you have aneurysms to clip," Meredith sighed, looking at him. She could see the primal instinct in his eyes to be there for her but she didn't need his help, not right now at least. She followed his eyes that directed to Mark Sloan and Richard talking in front of the staircase.

"And surgeons to confront," she directed it toward both Mark and Richard. He looked at her again, a sympathetic gaze this time.

"Take care of her Cristina and page me if you need anything," he said, giving her forehead a quick kiss before walking toward Richard, following him up the staircase.

"Well yeah, no way I'd miss this," Cristina smirked, standing near Meredith against the nurses station also. They both watched as George came to stand between them, Meredith laid her head in her hands and she felt nauseous again. This could not be happening at a worse time.

"Come on Richard!" Derek called after Richard as they both stood half-way up the staircase. Meredith felt her head spinning again, she wasn't as strong as before and she couldn't keep it down. She quickly made her way to the trash can that sat beside the nurses station, emptying the bile in her stomach.

"Crap, are you pregnant?" Cristina exclaimed loudly, causing everyone's gaze to shift toward Meredith. Meredith quickly shot an angry look at Cristina, ready to kill her for saying that in front of everyone.

"Oh great, an adulteress love child," Addison scoffed, watching as Derek quickly passed by her as he went straight to Meredith's side.

"Goes with an adulteress sociopath," he smirked back toward her way, trying to bypass Dr. Bailey to get to Meredith.

"Uh huh, you have done enough," Miranda tried to stop him but he didn't listen. He was right by her side, he put his hand on the small of her back and she relaxed against his touch.

Meredith couldn't hardly comprehend what Cristina, Bailey, and Derek were fighting about. She was more worried about keeping whatever was left in her stomach where it is. She slowly made her way to an exam room, Derek holding his position at her side until she was sat down on the exam room table. She took a few deep breathes before looking up at him.

"You have aneurysms to clip, I'll be fine," she assured him, trying to stay calm.

"Are you sure?" He pressed on, wanting to keep by her side.

"I am. Cristina can page you if I need you," She promised. He leaned down to kiss her forehead before slowly leaving.

"Cristina, draw her blood and run all possible test," Bailey instructed before leaving the two alone in the room.

"So who's the father?" Cristina smirked, grabbing the things to draw blood from Meredith.

"I'm not pregnant!" Meredith insisted. There was not way she could be pregnant.

"I didn't think I was pregnant when I was either, but you have abdominal pain and constant vomiting. So who's the father?"

"Im not pregnant."

"You don't know!"

"If I am, it has to be Derek's, can't be Finn's, " Meredith gulped, remembering back to Prom.

"You haven't had sex with the vet?" Cristina scoffed.

"No," Meredith mumbled, shaking her head.

"Oh you have to get out of that relationship immediately," Cristina laughed, sticking the needle in Mer's arm.

"Ouch!"

"Oh, go cry about it," Cristina rolled her eyes. She finished drawing two tubes of blood and put a bandage on Meredith's arm.

"Now let's go drop this off so I can prove you wrong," Meredith laughed. She took the test tubes herself and they both walked down to the lab.

"Put this in ASAP, patient is Jane Doe," Meredith said handing the lab tech the samples. She nodded before Mer walked away with Cristina.

"So why haven't you and the vet did it yet?" Cristina asked curiously, following Meredith.

"Celibate," Meredith reminded Cristina of her celibacy.

"Oh that didn't work when you saw McDreamy in the suit," Cristina joked, earning an eye roll from Meredith.

"Well that was a one time thing. I am with Finn now," Meredith shrugged. They walked into the cafeteria and Meredith grabbed a salad.

"Oh that's until he finds out you're having a McBaby with McDreamy."

"I'm not pregnant," Meredith said for what seemed like the thousandth time today.

"Okay. Whatever you say," Cristina rolled her eyes, sitting across from Meredith.

They both ate, Cristina continued to tease about being pregnant and as they finished, they were paged to the lab.

"Here goes nothing," Meredith raised her brows at Cristina. They both walked in silence back to the lab.

"I need the results for Jane Doe," Meredith said nervously. This was it, she knew the results were going to be negative but that didn't put her at easy.

"You do it," Meredith handed the results to Cristina.

"Alright," Cristina shrugged. She looked over the results and a smirk came across her face, "congratulations mommy."

Meredith froze for a second. She couldn't believe the words that left Cristina's mouth. Her world was about to change and she didn't have a clue how she was going to handle it.

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 **Song is Do I wanna Know by Arctic Monkey's**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note; Ok so I know this chapter isn't as long as the first chapter but I am working on the next update right now! Hope you guys like it!**

 **Thank you so much for all the reviews! So encouraging!**

* * *

 _Chapter II_

 _I wanna be your lover_

 _I don't wanna pressure you baby_

 _But all I ever wanted to do_

 _I wanna be your lover_

 _I wanna be the only one_

 _That makes your come, running_

* * *

"You can't be serious," Meredith exclaimed, grabbing the results from her hands. She read them over and over, hoping maybe the answers will change if she tried hard enough. This couldn't be real.

"It's true," Cristina said cautiously. She watched Meredith as her face was pale, extremely.

"Mer?" Cristina said, Meredith's face was in horror as she looked back up at her best friend.

"What are you going to do?" She asked cautiously.

"I got to find Derek," Meredith gulped. She folded the papers and hurried off. Finding Derek was the only thing she was worried about. She got on the empty elevator, riding it down to the second floor. As she stepped out, she caught the eye of one of the people she didn't even think about. Finn.

Before she could turn and run the other direction, he had already made contact with her eyes. He had that cheeky grin on his face as he walked toward her. All she could do was stand still and wait.

"Hey Mere," he said, pulling her into a hug. She cringed when she heard him call her Mere. Her name was Meredith, not Mere.

"Hey Finn," she tried to smile but her pounding head and turning stomach stopped her from it.

"Is everything alright?" He questioned, she hoped he hadn't sensed anything. She really did like him but there were so many other things that were happening and he wasn't one of her main concerns.

"Um, yeah of course. I was just trying to find someone," she couldn't tell him she was looking for Derek to tell him that he was going to be a dad.

"Oh, well I got a call from Bailey saying you were sick and I just wanted to come check up on you," he seemed genuine which made Meredith feel worse. She in no way wanted to tell Finn she was pregnant with Derek Shepherd's child. At least not yet, not until he knew.

"Oh no, I'm fine. Well I kinda am fine. It's complicated. I think you should go because I need to head back to work and you have some cute little animal to save," she tried to lie, her sentences were stopping as she tried to swallow the fluid creeping up her esophagus. Lying made her nausea worse, a lot worse.

"Meredith you don't sound fine. I don't want to leave you here if you are sick," he tried to say, making her start to feel annoyed. She tried to stay nice, he was sweet to her but she was not feeling in a nice mood at the moment.

"I am fine, I will explain things later. I just need..." Her sentence stopped as she saw Derek coming right toward her. She wanted to run, to flee. How the hell did this happen to her? She just wanted to crawl into a ball, waiting for the world to take her. Derek still had the worried look on his face as he approached the pair.

"I finally found you Mer," Derek said as he got to the two standing there. He wanted to reach out and touch her, having Finn around made him want to be superior.

"Derek," Finn said with a nod before returning his eyes to Meredith.

"Mer have you gotten any test results back? Shouldn't you still be in the bed? Does Cristina know you're up walking now around?" Derek started spitting questions at her. She was becoming overwhelmed by it all, a thick, burning liquid was making it's way up[ her esophagus as she tried to swallow it.

"What test results?" Finn questioned, he glanced curiously between the two people in front of him.

"I..." She started before running to the nearest trash bin. Her stomach poured out of her body and she nearly fainted into whomever was behind her.

"Meredith," he asked, rubbing her back as she was leaned over. He wanted to know so bad what was wrong with her, he hated it.

"I'm-I am pregnant. I wanted to tell you seperate but now I can't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she sobbed. Both men stood shocked, they looked at each other. Derek didn't know how to react, was it his? Was he going to be a father? He looked at her for answers as she wiped the tears that fell.

"Meredith can I speak with you?" Finn asked. She nodded, giving Derek an apologetic smile and she walked into an on-call with Finn.

"I just want to start by saying I know it is Derek's but if you still want to be with me, I will love this child as if it's my own," he said reassuring. She felt a little better but she was still confused. She didn't what what she wanted, all she knew was that she was having a baby and she couldn't think of anything else. Having a boyfriend was the last thing on her mind, she just wanted to explain.

"I don't know what I want. I do know that this child wasn't a mistake. I wanna talk to Derek and see what he wants to do. I want some space, so can I call you tomorrow? I'm going home after I tell Derek his options. I know you will be there," she wiped her eyes, giving Finn a small smile. He hugged her and she stiffened against him. He nodded slowly as he walked out the door, his head hung low. She slowly sank into the bed and cried softly. She didn't know what to do, it didn't help that her hormones where everywhere right now. She heard a knock on the door and sat up as Derek walked in.

"Mer," he slowly moved toward her. He felt bad, all he wanted to do was hold her and tell her everything was going to be alright. That no matter who the father was, he wanted her. She is the love of his life, there is nothing he wouldn't do for her.

"It's your child, Derek," She whispered, afraid to look at him.

"It is?" he sounded relieved, happy even. He was happy, happy that Meredith was having his child. Happy that he was finally going to have the family he wanted. Happy that for once, things were beginning to look up.

"If you don't want to be apart of this then leave now because I can't handle being around someone who is negative while I'm trying to be positive. I am having a child Derek, and whether you choose to be apart of it's life or not, that's up to you."

"I don't know what is going through your head but I do want you Meredith, I wanted you the first time I saw you in that bar and I want you even more now that you are having our baby. This baby will know who I am, I am it's father. I want to be with you Meredith. Now and forever," he said in a reassuring voice. He put his hand on hers and she pulled it away and looked into his eyes.

"Derek. I can't right now. I want some space, I need space. I will call you tomorrow, just please be ok with this," she got up and left. Her mind in so many different places. She had so many choices to make and not one of them would be easy.

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 **Song is I wanna be your lover by Prince**


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter III  
Lego House_

 _I'm gonna pick up the pieces_  
 _And build a lego house_  
 _If things go wrong_  
 _We can knock it down  
_ _My three words have two meanings  
But there's one thing on my mind  
_ _It's all for you_

* * *

Meredith watched the fan turn round and around, holding a pillow tight to her chest. She didn't know what she wanted, two men still here and a part of her knew what she wanted but she didn't know if she could do it. Could she trust him after everything that happened? He had hurt her so much but here he is, saying he's ready to start a life with her and their child. She did not know if she could trust him anymore.

Then there is Finn. Finn was the good guy, the right guy that a normal person would choose. He had never hurt her, he hadn't ran in the other direction yet. He was the smart decision but if he was the right answer, why was she still here? Why is she alone, in her living room, still trying to pick between two guys? She sighed as she heard a knock on her door. A part of her wanted to just stay where she was but she got up. She walked to her door, shocked at the sight in front of her.

"I thought I told you I had to think about it," she wanted to just close the door in his face but she couldn't. He had that dreamy look in his eyes and she couldn't turn him away, no matter how hard she tried.

"I know you did and I'm sorry if it is a bad time. I just wanted to check on you, can I come in?" He held up a paper bag, he brought a peace offering knowing exactly what she needed. From the three of his sister's who had been pregnant multiple times, he knew exactly what to get.

"No it's fine, just come in," she stepped aside; holding her arms across her chest. She watched as he walked cautiously in the house, into the living room.

"No one is here," she made sure he knew that everyone else was at the hospital.

"Oh Ok. Well I didn't know if you were still nauseous so I got you some ginger ale and crackers, also brought some strawberry ice cream if you were up to it," he put the stuff from the bag on the coffee table.

"Derek, you didn't have to," she said with a sigh. He gave her his dreamy smile, telling her that he did have to. He always knew what to do, no matter how much it had hurt to know it but deep down she knew the right choice. She knew which one of the men she could never live without and it scared her half the death.

"I know I didn't. I wanted to. This isn't a bribe either, I just wanted to check on you and the baby," he wanted to make sure she knew it wasn't just because he wanted to come and see her.

"Derek..."

"Just sit and relax. I'll go put the ice cream up and bring you a glass for the ginger ale," he hurried to the kitchen with the ice cream tub and returned with a glass. She sat down on the couch and watched him as he moved toward her.

"Here. Now I will get out of your hair," he handed her the glass and kissed the top of her hair.

"Call me if you need me," he said before starting toward the door. He partially hoped she would stop him, he wanted to talk to her more about them.

"Wait!" She called. He stepped back into the living room, giving her the McDreamy eyes.

"Hm?" He asked as he waited by the doorway.

"Come in, George and Izzie are at work and I don't wanna be alone anymore," she said with a sigh of defeat. His piercing eyes always won, though she could never admit that to anyone.

"Ok, do you wanna talk?" He asked cautiously, sitting down on the opposite side of the couch from her. He wanted to talk so badly, he secretly wanted to just talk and talk. Even if she did agree to talking, he had no idea what in the hell he would say to her.

"No, just be here," she laid back against the couch and laid her feet in his lap. He massaged her feet softly as the silence filled the room.

"Ok I do wanna talk," she pulled her feet from his hands and put them under her.

"About what?" He asked clueless.

"Why me? I get that this is your child but do you really want me? I'm dark and twisty and I don't even know why I want to be a mother to this child, I'll probably screw it up just like my mother screwed me up."

"You say you're all dark and twisty, it's not a flaw, it's a strength. It makes you who you are. You are going to be an incredible mother, you even know you are somewhere deep down. I love you because you are strong and compassionate. I know you are going to be an amazing mother to our child, even if you don't pick me to be with you, I will always be this child's father and you will always be the love of my life," he stared into her eyes as he said every word. He didn't know where it all came from but he knew he felt every single bit of it.

She started crying, the hormonal imbalance in her body caused her to burst into tears. She knew, she always knew it was him. It has always been him. From the time in the bar, to the time she agreed to go on a date with him, even to the time she found out about Addison. All of it and she was still in love with him. It wasn't just his perfect hair, or his perfect eyes, or even his dreamy smile. It was his undying care toward her, the messy hair that comes out of his favorite ferryboat scrub cap, the way his eyes light up and immediately look for her when she enters a room.

"Mer," he said sympathetically. He grabbed her and pulled her into his lap. He rubbed circles on her back, soothing her as she cried.

"I love you Derek but I don't know if I can trust you," she said honestly between tears.

"Then I will spend every day of my life trying to prove myself to you, if you let me."

"Ok," she continued to cry into his chest. She curled up against him, feeling safe in his embrace. She was glad it was him. Slowly she fell asleep to his heartbeat, something she could do for the rest of her life.

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 **Song is Lego House by Ed Sheeran.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! Just thought I'd post right now because I have finals this week and I started a new job so I can't post until at least sometime next week. I really hope all of you understand and I really want to thank everyone who reviews. I love every single one of you guys and I can't wait to be able to get these finals over with! Have a fantastic day!**

* * *

 _Chapter IV  
I Swear I Lived_

 _Hope when you take that jump_  
 _You don't feel the fall_  
 _Hope when the water rises_  
 _You build a wall  
_ _Hope when the crowd screams out  
_ _they're screaming your name  
_ _Hope if everybody runs  
you choose to stay_

* * *

Derek woke up, his body aches from the way he slept with Meredith on his chest.

Meredith.

He realized that she wasn't on him anymore, a light shined from the downstairs bathroom. He got up and approached the doorway to the bathroom, Meredith was slumped over the toilet and she looked weak and fragile.

"Are you ok?" Derek asked cautiously.

"Do I look ok?" She snapped, glaring at him.

"Can I do something for you?" He wanted to do something to help her but she wasn't happy at all.

"Get me a towel from the linen closet," she instructed and he quickly went and grabbed one and returning. He helped her up, holding her steady as she wiped her mouth against the towel.

He didn't know if she really meant what she said last night, he wanted to talk to her but he couldn't find the courage. He knew he had to be here and that was it.

"We have to talk," she breathed. Her whole body felt weak, her head was spinning and she felt nauseous but when it comes down to it, she is pregnant and it's normal.

"Yeah we do," he nodded. He helped her steady herself on her feet and followed her as she went into the living room. They sat on opposite sides of the couch, silence filled the room for what seemed like forever. Her head twisting and turning, she knew her answer and what she wanted but she couldn't handle it right now.

"I choose you, I want to be with you forever and that scares the hell out of me because of the mother issues and the trust issues and the hormones, it was like I knew all along but I couldn't because you're Derek and there's Finn. He's the right choice Derek but I'm in love with you," she rambled on, Derek sat and listened until she was finished.

"So you want me?" He said hopeful she was really meaning it.

"I do but we can't move fast, ok? Because when we move fast it just ruins everything. So I know there's so much you want to do for me and the baby but let's just calm down. Because I can't handle it right now. Baby steps."

"Ok. So small steps. Will I be able to go to your first appointment with you?" He asked cautiously. That was his biggest concern. He wanted to be there for that baby, and that is what he is going to do.

"Of course. I mean like you moving in and stuff, I'm not ready for that. No sex either."

"No sex?" He stuttered.

"Not yet. Slow remember?"

"Right. Slow."

"I want flowers and candy and the whole deal. We are dating."

"Ok."

"And when the time comes, we will talk about a future but right now we are just two people dating."

"I agree, since it does make sense. We never went on any real date before, this is good."

"Ok, so I need to talk to Finn. In Person."

"Ok, I'll go and you can go out or whatever with him and I'll come check on you tonight," he stood up, not giving her enough time to decline it before he was gone.

Meredith grabbed her phone, calling Finn. She asked him to come over so they can talk and he agreed. She hated having to break his heart because he was a nice guy but he wasn't the one. He was never the one.

She went and answered her door when he arrived, he had his small cheeky smile on his face. She hated this now more than ever.

"Hey Meredith. How are you feeling?" He asked trying to make light conversation.

"Finn, I'm good. Thanks, come in," she gulped as she stepped aside to let him in.

"Ok so I know we had so much fun but I just have to cut to the chase. Finn, I pick Derek," she held back her tears as the hurt came across his eyes.

"Meredith, he's going to hurt you again and I'm not going to be here to fall back on," He tried to change her mind but in the short time he knew her, she wasn't an easy person to change.

"Finn please, he's the father of my child. Yes he has hurt me before but that was then and this is now. He's a good guy," she put her defenses up, he was the love of her life and she wasn't going to let anyone talk bad about him.

"Just please, give it a little more time," he begged.

"Finn, I'm sorry. He's the one, I can't tell you any different. Even if I waited, it only be hurting you worse so just please understand," she begged, she thought this was going to be easy.

"Ok, goodbye Meredith," he sounded angry as he rushed out of the house. She felt terrible but she couldn't help her feelings. She went and sat on the couch, she was ready for Derek to come back over.

* * *

Meredith was awoken by the sound of a knock on her front door. She looked at the clock which said it was a little past 6pm. She sat up and went to the door, opening it to find Derek with a paper bag in his arms.

"I've come back with good stuff," he had the smile on his face, the smile that made her smile also.

"Come on, I'm starving," she smiled, her body ached from sleeping on the couch as she let him in. He went to the coffee table, dropping the bag of food from the local Italian restaurant.

"How was the talk with Finn?" He asked and she shook her head.

"I don't wanna talk about it, I want to eat."

"Ok," he nodded, he ordered her favorite lasagna and his usual.

"So does this constitute as a date?" He raised his eyebrows as he handed her the food.

"Nope," she giggled, something she hadn't done in a while. He smiled at her cute giggle, continuing to pull out some of the plastic forks and napkins along with his food.

"Well that's not fair. I brought your favorite food, this should count as something," he sounded offended.

"Ok fine. It can be a date but I want flowers next time."

"Good. I also brought movies."

"Ohh what movies?" She smiled cheekily, grabbing the two DVD's from his hands.

"The Breakfast Club and Breakfast at Tiffany's," he smiled, two classics.

"Of course, um let's watch The Breakfast Club first," she smiled as she took the first bite of her food. He chuckled at the small moan that came from her mouth.

"Good?"

"Amazing."

"Well good. I'm glad," he smiled, he could just watch her movements all night long,the cuteness all in one person. She was such an amazing woman, he is still clueless to how he got so lucky with such an amazing woman.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 **Song; I Swear I Lived by OneRepublic**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey Guys! Thanks for those who reviewed and understood about last week. I am finally out of classes for winter break and I'll be spending a lot of time on writing during the short break! I have been so excited to finish this and get this out for you guys! Make sure to leave a review so I can know if you guys like where this is going! Also want to give a small thanks to my best friend for giving me the ideas for this chapter! Anyway, enough with my rambling, hope you guys enjoy!**

* * *

 _Chapter V  
Make you feel my love_

 _When the rain is blowing in your face_  
 _And the whole world is on your case_  
 _I could offer you a warm embrace_  
 _To make you feel my love  
When the evening shadows  
And the stars appear  
And there is no one to dry your tears  
I could hold you for a million years  
To make you feel my love_

* * *

Meredith wasn't ready at all for her first appointment. So many possibilities, she knew she was going to hear the baby's heartbeat if there still was one.

What if she for some reason lost the baby? Or if she had a baby with a weak heartbeat or some other disability?

She walked through the front door of the hospital, Derek was sitting on the bench with a coffee in his hand. She knew he was waiting on her, he was the most excited of the two for the appointment. She knew he wanted a family but she never dreamed of the whole big family deal when she was a child.

"Hey Derek," Meredith stopped at the bench. He looked up at her and smiled widely.

"Morning Mer, so I didn't know if you could have coffee or not but I got you one," he stood up and held out the coffee cup.

"No, I can have it but the smell of coffee makes me vomit," she cringed at the thought of something she loved so much. He nodded, throwing the coffee away promptly.

"Ok, so I was thinking after the appointment we can call my mom. She knows I'm hiding something but I want your permission before I tell her," he asked, hoping she'd be ok with it.

"Yeah of course, it's your mother. Let's go," she led the way up to the OBGYN and they were led straight to an exam room. It seemed like forever, they stared at the posters and plastic models of the developing babies all over the room. It was an uncomfortable silence between them, a knock on the door relieved her.

"Hi, I'm Lucy Collins. I'll be your doctor," she smiled as she shook hands with Meredith and Derek.

"Are you the new doctor?" Derek asked, knowing he never seen her at any of the meetings.

"Just started a few weeks ago, and I'm guessing you are a doctor here?" She knew he looked familiar, and she did also.

"Yes, I'm an intern," Meredith nodded.

"I'm Derek Shepherd, chief of neurosurgery," he smiled charmingly.

"Ah alright so let's get started," she smiled. She began to ask questions and did a physical exam on Meredith.

"Ok, everything seems fine. I want to do another round of blood work and I'll send an ultrasound technician in here," Lucy left the room, letting Meredith change into a hospital gown, leaving her pants on underneath. She didn't know how to feel, she felt butterflies in her stomach, not only because she was seeing her child for the first time, but this would make it real.

A tech came in a few minutes later, sitting down on the stool and asking her a couple questions also before he started the ultrasound. He seemed friendly enough, trying to keep a smile on his face at all times.

They sat there in the dark, the monitor showed the fuzz and fluids while the ultrasound tech was looking for the embryo. He suddenly stopped and a small peanut like feature flashed across, a smile grew on Derek's face. Meredith sat quietly as he continued to look. She didn't know how to react, she didn't know if she should be happy or scared when the tech suddenly stopped, he turned the screen and continued to move the transducer all over her lower abdomen.

"Looks healthy, both babies are doing fine," he said and turned the monitor.

"What!?" Meredith's mouth dropped. Derek's smile faded a little bit.

"Twins?" Derek had a smile still strung across his face.

"Two healthy babies, both are measuring 8 weeks and two days," he said. He turned on the sound and flashed across both babies heartbeats, letting them hear each of them for a little bit of time.

"They are both in the same placenta, does that mean identical right?" Derek made sure to ask, he hadn't read an ultrasound since he was a resident. Meredith felt her breathing become faster. Twins. How the hell could that happen to her? What did she do in a previous life to cause this.

"Yes it does. Baby A is on the right and heart beat is strong at 155bpm and Baby B is just behind at 152bpm," he continued to do his measurements. Meredith was still in shock. She wasn't ready for one baby, much less two. Derek seemed happy, of course he was happy. He loves kids, this is good for him. For her, she just thought of everything that could go wrong now. She was high risk now, with twins. She had to worry about two little babies inside of her instead of one.

They got finished, got pictures of the ultrasound, she got dressed and they left and walked toward the lobby. Not a word was spoken but Derek was almost jumping out of his skin with joy. Meredith tried to be happy, she was glad he was happy but her doubts still clouded her mind. She didn't wanna take any chances, she couldn't jinx it.

"Can you drive me home then we can call your family," she said as they stepped off the elevator. She put on a smile, pretending not to be freaking out inside. She did love these babies but she couldn't handle two. She already was going to be a horrible mother but now she was going to have two kids, two lives she is going to ruin with her mother's horrible genes.

"Yeah, I'm so happy that I'm doing this with you," he kept his smile on his face, she practically leaned on him all the way to his car. They both got in, Derek drove back to her house with one hand steady on her undeveloped belly.

They pulled up to her house, both of them getting out. They went inside and into the kitchen.

"I'll call mom. Do you want me to make you something for lunch?" He asked as he took his jacket off.

"No thanks," she offered a smile before she sat down on the stool.

"Did you eat breakfast?"

She was silent, and he shook his head slightly. She knew she had to eat but with the constant nausea it was hard.

"I'll cook you something that will be easy on your stomach," he said as he pulled out his phone. He dialed his mother's number and put her on speaker phone.

Meredith gulped, she hadn't even met his mom before. She was having his babies and hadn't even met his mom.

"Hi ma."

"Derek Shepherd! I haven't heard from you in a week! I was ready to jump on a plane and come see if you were alright." His mother scolded him. Carolyn Shepherd was not one to worry about her kids but since that night he called her crying over Meredith and Addison, she had been constantly worrying about him.

"I'm sorry ma, just some things came up but I have good news."

"This news better be good! I haven't heard from my only son in days."

"Ma, remember how I talked to you about Meredith?"

"Oh this Meredith, the same one you fell in love with but you stayed with Addison for whatever reason?" she scolded. Derek knew his mother didn't like Addison, especially after what she had did to him.

"Yes Ma. Well we are together now and we found out she is pregnant," he said. There was a long pause before Carolyn spoke up.

"Why haven't I heard about this before? Have you told your sisters?" She began to question him, she wasn't sure how she felt yet. She hadn't ever met Meredith but she was now suddenly pregnant by her son.

"I haven't told anyone, and we just went and got an ultrasound today. The babies are perfectly healthy," he said with an emphasis on babies.

"Babies!? As in more than one!" She suddenly got excited.

"Yes Ma, two babies. Perfectly healthy little peanuts. She's 8 weeks."

"That's wonderful dear. I want to come out there and meet you two. Or better yet you two can fly here and she can meet everyone. Oh it would be so wonderful to finally meet the woman I've heard so much about."

Meredith froze, she didn't do mother's. She couldn't even handle her own mother half the time, she especially didn't do family's. She hoped Derek would disagree. Maybe he could come to his senses and just leave this all under the water.

"I don't know ma, we will talk about it later." Derek noticed how Meredith reacted. He got off the phone with his mother relatively quick.

"What's the matter?" Derek asked when he noticed the look on Meredith's face.

"Nothing, it's nothing. So about that food?" She tried to change the subject. She couldn't tell him her irrational fear of mother's and family's.

"Right, I'll get right on that," he nodded, kissing her forehead before he started searching through her pantry.


	6. Chapter 6

**An: Hey Guys! I've been meaning to upload this for the past two days but I've just been exhausted after work and haven't had the chance. Anyway this is a short chapter, I am sorry about that, but the next chapter will be longer! Thanks for the reviews and reading!**

* * *

 _Chapter VI_

 _Ignition_

 _It's the remix to ignition_  
 _Hot and fresh out the kitchen_  
 _Mama rollin' that body_  
 _Got every man in here wishin'_

* * *

Meredith woke up, not from her usual feeling of nausea but for something different. A new phase was entering her pregnancy and she tossed and turned, the urge was rushing through her body and she didn't know what to do about it. She couldn't fill the need by herself, she needed the person who did this to her to help. She craved it, like there was no tomorrow. She knew he was on-call and probably at the hospital. A wicked idea came into her brain and she smirked and she threw the covers off her body. Her stomach now having a small bump to it, nothing more than a little extra pudge.

It was 5:00am, she could claim she wanted to have an early start when she went in. Excuses continued to flow through her as she threw clothes on her body, making it out the door as fast as she could. No good excuse could come to mind as her head was still in a trans. She craved his touch, she didn't care about the rules anymore.

After parking her car, she quickly hurried inside to find Derek. She looked all over until she found him at the nurses station. He looked exhausted, like he had just gotten out of a long surgery.

"Hey," she whispered in his ear and he whipped around and a smile grew on his face.

"Hi, you're here early," he kept that smile on his face. He loved seeing her, no matter the circumstances.

"Mhm, come with me," she took his hand and dragged him to an empty on-call room.

"What are you doing?" He managed to ask before she attacked him with her lips.

"Do I need to explain," she said coming up for air, before he looked dumbfounded. He assumed she didn't want to have sex yet, they had only went on two dates since their agreement.

"Mm, we have to talk," he mumbled in between kisses. Her body pressing up against his made it hard for him to even think.

"Can't we talk later?" She smirked, her hand traveled down his torso and down to his pants.

"Yes," he gave in to her, lifting her up and laying her down on to the bed. He lifted her shirt from the bottom, dragging his tongue from her pant line up as he slowly took her her shirt.

"Fuck Derek," she bucked her hips against him, feeling his bulge trying to push out of his pants. Their moans and groans filled the air as their clothes were removed, his tongue danced with hers as their bodies collided.

Her hands in his hair, pulling the tips as he thrust harder. His lips on her neck as she pressed her body against his. Their bodies were one, for the first time in a few months he had craved her every minute he's been with her. Finally joined together, moving as one. After what seemed like just a few short minutes, they sent each other into an orgasmic train.

Both of them coming off their high, he rolled off her and by her side. Their sweaty bodies still extremely close to one another. He slowly moved his hand over the bump that had slowly developed over the last thirteen weeks. Her hand covered his and she looked over at him.

"What did you want to talk about?" She breathed heavily, her head still spinning.

"So since we already had sex, I was thinking I should take you out to dinner tonight," he smiled, earning a small, breathless giggle from her.

"You should, and to that new Italian place they just put in town," she had craved anything to do with pasta.

"So I'll meet you in the lobby at 8?" He asked, slowly getting up to put his scrubs back on.

"Mhm," she put her clothes back on, leaning up to place a quick kiss on his lips.

"See you at 8," she mumbled as she was going out the door. She hurried up to the locker room and changed into her scrubs.

"Grey, you and Yang are in the pit," Bailey shouted as she stood at the doorway. Meredith rolled her eyes, she hated the pit almost as much as she hated scut.

"So how's dating McDreamy going?" Cristina asked as she walked next to Meredith.

"It's good, I don't really know how else to explain it," she really didn't know what it was, it's like nothing has changed from before except now she has a fetus in her stomach, their fetus.

"Nothing different?" she questioned. That didn't make much sense, things should have changed.

"Nope. We are taking it slow, or we were suppose to be taking it slow. I wanted to take it slow then these stupid pregnancy hormones basically pulled the plug on that plan," she groaned. She didn't regret the sex, she never regretted sex with him, she just wished they would have stuck to the plan. That she should have been able to stick to the plan.

"So you guys were not having sex and now you are?"

"No. Yes. Kind of, I don't know. I don't want to have sex but I do want to have sex. It's been so long and I just want to jump on him every time I see him," she tried to explain. Everything seemed so complicated.

"Mer it sounds really complicated. Are you sure you're ok with everything?" Cristina was confused by her person like she always was. Meredith was still fragile, she didn't want her to get hurt.

"I am positive, so how's you and Burke?" Meredith tried to change the subject, she saw how Cristina rolled her eyes but she chose to ignore it, nothing else she could do about it. She knew her life was only getting more complicated but it didn't matter because she was happy.

* * *

 **Song; Ignition Remix by R. Kelly**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note; I'm back! Alright so here is their date chapter! Really loved writing this, haha. Already working on the next few chapters which brings a whole new view into this story. Some will like it, other's will not. It's just how I feel it should be portrayed but anyway, back to this chapter. It's really going to be easy-going, really light a fluffy. Hope you enjoy it!**

 **P.S. Thank you to those who are still reading this and following this story! Special thanks to those reviewing, your kind comments make my day! A little info on my other story, I am still working on that! I am going to work on Survivor's Guilt this weekend since I have a day off school Monday. Happy Reading!**

* * *

 _Chapter VII  
_ _This_

 _This is the start_  
 _Of something beautiful_  
 _This is the start_  
 _Of something new_  
 _You are the one_  
 _Who'd make me loose it all_  
 _You are the start_  
 _Of something new_

* * *

Seven-thirty came along and Meredith had retreated to the locker room to change. She and Derek had never really went on any dates when they were seeing each other the first time. She felt nervous, something she never really ever felt. She didn't even know why she was nervous, they have been together for what seemed like forever now.

She put on her lilac sweater along with her jeans and keeping her regular converse on, she wished she had something nicer to put on but she was in a rush this morning so she didn't even think about it. She waited out her nerves until she had just enough time to make it to the lobby right before eight.

As she stepped off the elevator, she saw him standing there with his eyes looking down at his phone. His hair perfectly tousled along with his coat and good jeans, the ones that outlined his ass perfectly. The stupid pregnancy hormones kicked in again, causing her to feel all hot and bothered just looking at him. She didn't know how she could spend all night in public with him and not jump his bones. As she got closer to him, she smelled his cologne, the perfect scent that just made her nostrils fall in love with him.

"Hey there sexy, got a hot date?" She smirked, trying to flirt with him. He looked up at her, smiling and shaking his head slightly at her.

"I do, with this amazing woman who looks just perfect and smells like, like this flower that just makes me crazy when I smell it," he smiled as he leaned down and placed a quick kiss on her lips.

"Mhm, lavender. It's in my condition," she giggled, walking next to him. He grabbed her hand as they walked out the doors.

"Ah well I love it, my new favorite flower," he smiled back down at her. He loved her giggly face as she looked back at him. Even at night she had this radiating glow to her skin, pregnancy sure did look great on her.

"I'll remember that. So I drove to work this morning so we can take your car or mine," she shrugged as they stopped just before the end of the sidewalk.

"How about you drive yours to your house and I'll follow behind you so I can take you home afterward," he smiled, guiding her toward her car.

"Alright, well maybe you can stay the night too," she smiled, having a smirk to her face. He shook his head slightly as he opened the door for her.

"Not today, I'm keeping my word," he whispered against her lips before kissing her deeply. He pulled away before things got too hot and closed her door. He went back to his car and drove to Meredith's house. She was already there and standing against the back of car. She hopped in, a smile on her face extremely wide as she leaned over and placed a quick kiss on his lips.

They drove to the little Italian restaurant they talked about, the ride was pretty quiet. They were each in their little own world, him holding her hand just to make sure she was still there. They arrived at the restaurant that was extremely pack, Meredith now weary of going in and waiting forever.

"We don't have to eat here," she spoke up, watching as another crowd of people moved into the small building.

"Is that what the babies want?" He asked seriously. She bit her lip, wanting to not answer because she was craving it.

"Yes," she mumbled, looking into his eyes. She could tell by the look on his face that he was going to do anything to get her the food.

"Then we will figure something out," he replied with a smile. They both got out of the car and walked toward the crowded building, hand-in-hand. Derek proceeded to kiss Meredith's cheek as he told her to wait there under the pavilion next to the restaurant before he went inside by himself.

Meredith stood and waited, she paced slowly by the tables and sat down as she waited. It seemed like forever before Derek came out with a large, brown bag and a grin from ear to ear.

"What is this?" She referred to the bag he carried toward her.

"Dinner, come on," he said as he took her hand and leaded her back to the car. She was surprised by his actions as they drove down a familiar path. She smiled when she realized where they were going as they turned down a dirt path. They came to stop where a cliff that over watched the bay. The night sky was clear so you could see the stars shine so bright.

"Do you remember when you took me up here for the first time?" He asked and she smiled, her cheeks turning blush. She felt her core become warm when she thought about that night oh-so many months ago. It seemed like yesterday they were acting fools in the rainy sky on the ground just a few feet away from them.

"Yeah, and I wouldn't mind doing what we did again," she smirked, moving closer to him. He laughed and shook his head, grabbing the bag and placing a small kiss on her lips before getting out.

"Can you grab the blanket from the back?" He asked as he waited for her. She sighed as she got out and grabbed the large blanket, spreading it across the grass. The last of the ferryboats for the night were rolling through the bay. The moon was their only lighting as they sat down.

"Since you can't have wine, I got us water," he pulled the two water bottles from the paper bag first and handed her one of them.

"How sweet of you, I really wish I could," she sighed and he just smiled.

"I know. But it's worth it," he put on his McDreamy smile as he handed her the food. She smiled in return, the way he looked at her made her blush slightly. She looked in the containers at all of her favorite food, she shook her head at him.

"What?" He asked as he looked questionably at her.

"Nothing, it's just you know me so well," she smiled cheekily at him. He leaned over and kissed her, a long and sensual kiss. One that lasted a long time and Derek was the one to pull away.

"Eat, you and the babies need food," he motioned toward the food and she rolled her eyes. She wanted desert first, but he was being honest and true to the words he said to her when they agreed to be together so she couldn't stay mad at him.

They are and talked for a little in between bites. Meredith would let out a small moan when she took bites off her fork, causing Derek to stir. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't resist her. Her gorgeous smile and the way her eyes lit up, the moon light shining perfectly on her face. He also loved the small giggles that would erupt from her when he made one of the stupid faces or jokes he did.

"Ok, did you get desert too because chocolate sounds amazing right now," she said as she licked the last of the sauce off her lips. She had devoured a whole plate of pasta and a few breadsticks along the way.

"I did," he smirked as he pulled out a small piece of chocolate cake with a side of strawberries.

"Strawberries, god you know me," she blushed slightly as she grabbed one out of the container. She made a slight face when she bit into the strawberry, the tart taste the cause. He stared at the little bit of juice the dribbled down from the corner of her mouth and licked his lips.

"Here let me get that," he smirked as he inched toward her. She could feel his breathing get heavy as he moved closer to her. She prepared herself for his kiss and in an instant her hands were around his neck as she was pulling him on top of her. He landed between her legs, hers wrapping around his waist as their tongues danced in the moonlight. He felt himself thrust against her, his lips moving toward her neck. He suckled on her pulse as she let out a loud moan.

Something in him clicked and he realized what was about to happen and he pulled away from her. She looked shocked as she starred blankly back at him.

"Why'd you stop?" She asked breathlessly.

"Because, I want to respect you and your wishes. We slipped up this morning but that was it," he assured her. She let out a sigh, he was right. She wanted to go slow, she wanted to wait but he was too irresistible to her.

"God why do you have to be such a gentleman," she released a breath before she sat up also. Patrick stared at her, instantly regretting his decision. Her hair was messy and her breathing still heavy as her chest rose and fell faster than normal.

"It's getting late, I should get you home," he said as he stood up. He reached out his hand and she used it as a way to help herself up. He grabbed all the left over's and the blanket and packed them away in the car while Meredith waited in the front seat.

He drove slower than he normally would, enjoying the time he was spending with her. They arrived at her house quicker than he hoped and he got out, going to open her door and he lead her to the front porch. His hand in hers, they reached the door. He stopped and looked down at her with a sympathetic smile on his face.

"I had a really good time," she smiled, holding onto both of his hands and swung them lightly.

"Me too," he returned the dreamy smiled. He leaned down, putting his hands on her cheeks as he pulled her into a longing kiss. It lasted forever as they stood under the porch light. They pulled away for air, his forehead resting on hers.

"Goodnight Derek," she said, biting on her bottom lip slightly.

"Night Mer," he watched as she went inside, waiting until he heard her lock the door before he slowly moved to his car. That night was the best night he had in a long time. He truly believed his life was finally falling into place.


	8. Chapter 8

_Chapter VIII_  
 _Soldier_

 _Where did all the people go_  
 _They got scared_  
 _When the lights went low_  
 _I'll get you through it_  
 _Nice and slow_  
 _When the world's spinning out of control_

* * *

Meredith sat down, she had finally gotten a break for the first time that day. Her back was killing her, she was starving and still horny. She would kill for a cheeseburger and sex. Not in that particular order.

She pulled out her phone to check, she had a missed call from the nursing home and she called them back quickly. They hadn't called her in a while and now she missed their call.

"Hello?" Meredith answered the phone. So many things could have happened since then.

"Hi, may I help you?" The lady sounded sweet.

"Yes, my name is Meredith Grey and I had missed a call from my mother, Ellis Grey's nurse and I was just calling her back," Meredith explained how she was a surgeon and her schedule was busy. Her hand unintentionally rested against her small stomach. She didn't look exactly pregnant yet, she just looked bloated. She was only 14 weeks so of course she didn't have a belly yet.

"Oh yes, I will get your mother's nurse just a second," she said before the line went on hold. Meredith waited, tapping her foot anxiously against the tile floors. A few minutes passed before the nurse answered.

"Hello Meredith, it's Katie," her mother's regular nurse said as she answered.

"Hi Katie, did you need anything?" Meredith calmly asked. She didn't want to admit to anyone but she hoped her mother was alright. No matter how much she despised her mother for ruining her childhood, she still cared for her.

"Oh yes, I was just calling to let you know she woke up lucid. I don't know how long it's going to last but she's been asking for you," Katie explained. Meredith's heart dropped. She didn't know how much longer she had with her mother but she suddenly felt guilty for not being there.

"Oh um yes, my shift is about to end so just tell her I'm on my way and I'll be there soon," Meredith said as she jumped up and hurried to the locker room. She hung up with the nurse and threw on her regular clothes. As she grabbed her stuff and hurried out of the room, she saw Derek leaning against the nurses station. His hair hidden inside the ferryboat scrub cap and his hand was busy writing away. She went up behind him, she felt her body become heated as she got closer.

"Hey Derek," she smiled and he turned around. He looked exhausted, his normally bright eyes looked dull.

"Hey Mer, you got off?" He asked, noticing she was in regular clothes.

"Um yeah, I got a call and my mother is lucid," Meredith gulped. She was nervous to see her mother.

"Oh that's good news, do you want me to come with you? We can tell her about the babies," He smiled, shutting the chart. She felt a wave of guilt come over her, she didn't want to tell her mother but she had to.

"Oh um no, you're busy. I'll catch up with you later," she gave him a quick kiss before she left, she didn't know how her mother was going to react to her news. She especially didn't want him to be around if her mother acted like she was before her Alzheimer's got really bad. The only thing Ellis Grey wanted for her daughter was to become extraordinary and this would be a disappointment for her.

As she pulled into the parking lot of the nursing home, Meredith suddenly felt her fight or flight instinct coming through and all she wanted to do was run. Running solved everything in her life, until recently when everything was biting her in the ass. It seemed like the most odd thing when she walked into her mother's room and she had a smile on her face.

"Meredith, you've grown up," Ellis commented as Meredith slowly walked in. She felt the need to hold her arms across her self, trying to hide her stomach.

"I have," Meredith nodded. She stood a good bit away from her mother who was reading the paper at the small reading area set up in her room.

"So please, have a seat. I want to know about you," Ellis encouraged. It had been 5 years since she remembered having a conversation with her daughter.

"Ok, well um I am an intern at Seattle Grace," she gulped, she always knew her mother wanted her to be great but it still scared the hell out of her.

"Oh that's wonderful, have you thought about what specialty you wanted to go into?" She asked as she sat the paper down and turned to her daughter, giving her all of her attention.

"Um I am not real sure. I really enjoy Neuro but general is nice too," she wanted her mother to be proud.

"Ooh, I just knew I wanted general when I was on rotation as an intern. I hope you get that feeling too, so what about your personal life?" Ellis asked. Meredith suddenly got scared, she froze up as she heard that her mother wanted to know about her personal life.

"Ah you know I'm staying busy with work. I um... I actually have been seeing someone and it's pretty serious," she prayed quickly that her mother didn't criticize him.

"Does he know about your career? Cause even if he does, most men won't under stand the constant needs of a surgeon," she was referring to Thatcher, Meredith's father.

"Yes mom, actually he is a doctor," she made sure to mention, Derek knew about the constant needs of a surgeon.

"Ah, anything else?" Ellis asked, she seemed like she wanted to know everything. Meredith was scared. She was going to mention to her mother she was pregnant and her mother would be the way she always has been and would go all Ellis Grey on her and she didn't want that.

"Um... Actually mom there is something that I..." Meredith was about to tell her before Ellis suddenly froze her, she took in a deep breath as her hand flew to her chest. Meredith quickly went to her mother's aid. She called one of the nurses in and they called 911.

"It's ok mom, we are taking you to the hospital," Meredith said calmly as the paramedics came rushing in. The look of panic on her normally cold mother's face said everything to Meredith. Her heart dropped when she watched her mother in pain being laid on the stretcher. It brought back a very much real memory from her childhood she didn't want to relive. She knew she had to be strong as she followed the paramedics into the ambulance.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note; Hey Guys! I just wanna thank you all for the wonderful reviews I am getting! I can't wait to see what you guys think of this chapter. Something unexpected happens and idk how you'll react. Happy Reading!**

* * *

 _Chapter IX_  
 _Second Chances_

 _I watched the world outside_  
 _By the way,_  
 _I'm leaving out today_  
 _I just saw Halley's comet_  
 _She waved_  
 _Said, "Why you always running in place?"_  
 _Even the man in the moon disappeared_  
 _Somewhere in the stratosphere_

* * *

Derek stood still as he watched Meredith worried with guilt and panic. He didn't know how he could help her, he could go check on Ellis but at the same time he wanted to be there for Meredith. She paced the halls, she hadn't spoken in the two hours she's been at the hospital.

"Mer," he said worried as she kept her head at the floor.

"Hmm?" She mumbled as she continued to pace.

"Would you like to sit? Do you need anything?" He calmly asked, wanting to help. Even if that meant just being here he would.

"I need my mother to be alive, I know she was never a good mother but at least she tried. I need there to be a cure for Alzheimer's because I don't know if she wakes up and is back to her old self or if she even wakes up at all. I just need her to be alive and to be lucid because I really want her to know about our kids," she said, slightly angered but more scared than anything.

"Mer, she's going to be alright. The best cardio surgeon in the country is working on your mother," he tried to reassure her with the fact that Preston is working on her mother but he knew that wouldn't help.

"I'm just going to continue to be this way so you can just either be here or go find something to do," she snapped, continuing to pace. Derek just nodded before sitting down and watching her. Even in this state, she had one hand on her slightly swollen stomach, no matter how much she claimed that she was going to be a terrible mother, she wasn't. She already loved those babies, he knew it deep down that she was going to be the best mother she could be.

It seemed like hours of her, she was becoming restless between the pacing and then having to rest and pacing again. She just wanted everything to be alright. No matter how bad of a mother Ellis was, Meredith did love her. She sighed with relief when she saw her person walking through the doors with Burke, her stomach began to flutter with a slight bit of hope. They didn't seem upset, that was always a good sign. She stood there, she felt Derek rise and put his arm around her waist to hold her up.

"How is she Preston?" Derek asked, knowing Meredith wanted to ask.

"She's in recovery. She did have a major heart attack and we had to put her on bypass, we have to go in and repair her ventricular wall due to the damage in a few days," he explained the situation.

"Alright, so she's alright?" Meredith finally got a normal breath in as he said that.

"Yes. But we will be keeping her for a while," he nodded and Meredith agreed that was best.

"I also suggest she get a full body CT just to check for more damage," Burke said before leaving.

"Cristina, how did it really go," Meredith asked when Burke left.

"It went really well, better than expected. You should get some rest," Cristina encouraged. Meredith just nodded and she left. Meredith sat back down on the chair and just breathed. She had felt so many emotions at one time, all she knew was that she was glad her mother was alive.

"Mer?" Derek whispered as he sat back down next to her, putting his arm around her shoulder's. It took her a minute before she turned to him, so much hurt and fear in her eyes.

"I didn't tell her that I was pregnant, I need to tell her whether she is lucid or not," Meredith said, Derek just nodded. He saw her eyes began to release the tears and he just pulled her close to him. He didn't know how long they sat there like this before one of the nurses came and told her that they could go see Ellis.

"Come with me, please," she whispered, he just nodded and helped her up. They walked hand in hand into the ICU and into Ellis's room, she opened her eyes and the slightly confused look on her face made Meredith confident that maybe she was lucid.

"Mom?" Meredith let go of Derek's hand as she went into her room. Ellis stared at Meredith for a second before she said anything.

"Meredith?" Ellis croaked, her throat sounding dry.

"Here mom, drink some water," Meredith couldn't help but feel relieved as she handed her mother the water.

"Who is this?" Ellis asked after she drank some of the water. She was talking about Derek, Meredith knew this automatically.

"I'm Dr Derek Shepherd, Chief of Neurosugery," he introduced himself to Ellis, she was a bit confused at first, knowing that she most likely had a heart attack and didn't know why a neurosurgeon was in her room.

"Are you here about my Alzheimer's? Meredith did you tell him about it?" She asked, her eyes darting at her daughter.

"Yes mom but not for what you think. Mother, this is my boyfriend," Meredith felt nervous all over again, she had never had to introduce her mother to her boyfriend before and she didn't know how Ellis would react.

"Hmm yes I figured, the way you were looking at my daughter told me, it was the way Richard once looked at me," Ellis nodded, Meredith knew her mother had an affair with Richard, she would always remember her parents fighting about it, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt any less.

"Dr Grey, I understand that you probably won't..." Derek tried to say something but Ellis immediately stopped him.

"Derek, please understand that I get you two may be involved now but I have no idea when or if I'll ever be lucid again but I do know that you better take good care of my daughter because she deserves it after the hell she's been through," Ellis seemed to be tearing up. This was a foreign thing for Meredith, her mother was a strong and intelligent woman who never cried. She felt a stray tear fall down her cheek as her mother was actually showing compassion for the first time in her life.

"Mother he will, and we have to tell you something," Meredith suddenly felt her stomach flip and the flutters returned. She didn't know what to do next except tell her.

"What is it Meredith? I don't have all day you know," her bluntness only made Meredith more nervous. She was right, she didn't have all day. She could just go back to her old self any second really.

"Mother I just wanted to say that what I'm about to tell you is something i am happy about. Me and Derek are going to have a baby. Well babies, it's twins," Meredith quickly spit out what she wanted to say and waited. The waiting was terrible, it seemed like Ellis's lucid state had gone. It seemed like hours but it was only minutes before Ellis replied.

"I don't really know how to respond. I just... Meredith promise me something," Ellis grabbed Meredith's hand, taking her by surprise. Meredith never recalls her mother showing any affection throughout her childhood.

"What is it?" Meredith suddenly felt like she had to take her mother seriously.

"I've never told you anything like this Meredith but please be extraordinary in every way that I wasn't and even in ways I was. I want you to become an extraordinary woman and to be an extraordinary mother to these two children. Your work is important but so are these children," Ellis spoken highly of Meredith's babies, which really confused Meredith. Her mother never had spoken to her like this, it was scary.

"Mom I will, I love these babies and Derek. They will always come first," Meredith rubbed her belly, the flutters continued. If she wore a tight shirt you could probably see that she was definitely pregnant due to the size of the bump.

"How far along are you?" Ellis asked curiously, noticing how Meredith was very fond of the babies. Ellis knew Meredith would be a good mother, she just had to believe in herself.

"Fifteen weeks," Meredith smiled, holding her hand on a spot she was sure there was one of the babies.

"Oh, that's nice. Have you felt them move yet? You know I felt you move at thirteen weeks, it was only small flutters and honestly didn't feel like much unless I was nervous or very happy," Ellis smiled at the fond memory, she missed remembering stuff.

"Well I'm not sure, I think I have once before," Meredith thought, she didn't really know how it would feel, maybe it was the small flutters she had been feeling all day.

"You probably have, well you both probably have things to do and I am getting a little tired," Ellis nodded, feeling fatigued all the sudden.

"Oh alright. Well if you're not lucid when I see you again then I'll wait until you are again," Meredith nodded, she really enjoyed her mother's company. Maybe it was that she had grown up or her mother maybe felt guilty but whatever it was made Meredith feel amazing.

"Alright," Ellis smiled, a genuine smile at the both of them. Meredith got up and went over to Derek, grabbing his hand in relief. They began walking out before Ellis asked them to wait for a second.

"Meredith, you're extraordinary. I love you," Ellis had a large grin on her face, Meredith didn't know how to react, her mother never said she loved her when she was younger at all.

"Thank you mom. I love you too, see you later," she just smiled, squeezing Derek's hand a little tighter as they walked out the door.

Derek put his arm around Meredith, walking a little forward with her, he could feel how that conversation made her strong and a better person. He knew that it meant everything to Meredith for Ellis to say those things and he was grateful. Just as they got to the nurses station, the monitors began blaring from the room they had just came from.

It was a blur, how Derek had to hold Meredith back as the code team was rushed into the room. How they had tried four times, how Meredith was in tears, Derek continued to hold Meredith tightly as the code team called time of death. It was all a blur, for both Meredith and Derek. Meredith had hoped this was her second chance with her mother but she realized not everything in her life could have a second chance.


	10. Chapter 10

_Chapter X_  
 _Chasing Cars_

 _We'll do it all_  
 _Everything_  
 _On our own_  
 _We don't need_  
 _Anything_  
 _Or anyone_

* * *

Meredith sat on the edge of the bed, her black dress pants still haven't made their way onto her legs. She didn't have the energy, she was numb. Her head quickly whipped around when there was a knock on her bedroom door before it opened and Derek walked in. She turned back and continued to stare toward the wall.

"Mer?" He asked calmly. He had been there to support her, trying to help her not break down. She tried to be strong, pretending to be alright but he thinks she finally reached her breaking point. He stood in front of her and she continued to stare at him. It caught him by surprise when she reached up and tugged at his belt buckle, he started to protest before she looked at him with sad and needy eyes.

"Derek please," she begged silently. He sat next to her on the bed, removing his jacket as he moved closer to her. Their lips met softly, her leaning in on him and placing her hand on his chest. Their lips danced together slowly, he didn't want to rush her so he let her lead the way. She was the one who started to undress him, the one who laid down and pulled him on top of her, letting him know it was his turn to take control.

They weren't having sex, it wasn't just quick and easy, it was slow and steady. He wanted to take his time to enjoy her, to please her and make her feel better. This was for her, he knew sex was always, in a way, healing for Meredith. He kissed her gently as he laid down next to her, letting her curl into his arms. They stayed like that for a few minutes before tears began rushing down her cheeks and on to his chest. He just held her, letting her cry until she couldn't anymore. He didn't know exactly what she was feeling, he honestly didn't want to know what she was feeling for a long time.

It was at least an hour before there was a knock on the door indicating they had to get dressed. Derek helped Meredith as much as he could, giving her encouraging kisses each time she would stop for a second. He held her hand tightly as they walked out and downstairs to George and Izzie waiting on the pair. They knew they didn't have to be there but they wanted to, since it was hard on Meredith enough as it is.

Derek drove the four of them to the crematory, never letting go of Meredith's hand the whole drive. The radio didn't turn on, it was just silence the whole way. George and Izzie tried to make light conversation but Meredith stayed silent causing everyone else to also be silent.

Derek kept and eye on Meredith, she kept one hand on her stomach as they were walking, even talking to the cremation assistant. He explained the process of the cremation and led Meredith and Derek to the room where it would happen. Ellis was lying on the silver tray that would be pushed into the fire, her body covered by a thin sheet.

"I'll leave you to say goodbye, just when you're ready to have the process happen, just hit the red button and you can leave whenever you want," the man said before leaving the room. It took Meredith a moment before approaching the body, but she squeezed Derek's hand tighter and her hand moved in circles on her stomach as they moved closer. Derek wanted to know exactly what was going in her head, she seemed lost but she wasn't showing any emotion.

"Well mom, this is it. So just going to make this short and simple because I have a doctor's appointment to find out what the babies are, sure you already know, and I have a twelve hour shift after that. You know how that is, well I guess this is goodbye," Meredith shifted, she started to reach out to touch Ellis but she changed her mind, residing in Derek's arms once again. He held her close as they walked slowly over to the button and pressed it. Ellis began moving toward the opening where her body would soon become only ashes. Meredith didn't cry, she was just silent as they stood their.

They waited, waited until she was fully inside the chamber before Meredith began moving toward the door to leave the room. Derek held his arm around her securely, going to the office to inform them that they had started. They told them that they would be in contact for when her remains would be ready for pick up and wished the best to Meredith and Derek.

"Are you still up for the appointment?" Derek wanted to make sure she was still alright with it, they hadn't known what was happening today when they scheduled the appointment and he wouldn't mind cancelling if she needed it.

"No, I need to see them," Meredith said without even a doubt in her mind. She had grown so attached to the babies in her stomach, they were one of the only reasons that she was getting through the days.

"Ok, well we can go to the hospital and go straight to the appointment and go home," he said, hoping she would take more time off work. She had only taken off a week, he didn't think she was ready.

"No I've already told you, I am going back to work," she argued, he didn't want to argue so he just nodded as they arrived to the lobby where Izzie and George were waiting on the pair.

"So any interesting surgeries?" Meredith tried to make conversation in the car. She was tired of people tip toeing around her, she was fine.

"Uh Bailey is operating with Webber on liver guy and I am going to try and scrub in," George shrugged, earning a glare from Izzie.

"That's nice, Iz?" Meredith managed a small smile as she glanced back at Izzie.

"Nope, I'm still on scut," Izzie said, biting her lip. The car was silent again as they finished their drive to the hospital. They went their separate ways, Derek escorting Meredith to her appointment.

"So what do you think they are?" Meredith asked curiously, she never really had asked him.

"I have no idea, hoping for boys," he smiled widely, at least he knew that at least both were the same sex since they were identical.

"I am hoping on boys, they seem easier," Meredith said, she always hated girls and it was a rare event if she got along with a female.

"Well we will see," Derek offered a smile, placing a quick kiss on her forehead as they exited the elevator. They went into the office and straight back into an exam room. Meredith sat patiently on the table, Derek sitting on a chair beside her.

"I've been thinking about names," Meredith spoke up, putting one hand on her stomach.

"Oh really? I am so bad with names," Derek chuckled, remembering how his sister Liz tried to get Derek to help her pick a name.

"Yeah. You know how I never thought I was going to have a family when I was younger but well, there was this guy who lived down the street from me in Boston and we weren't exactly friends, he was a little older and had his own friends but every day he would walk home with me from school because we were basically the only kids who lived on the street I lived on, he was kind of a brother figure for a few years until it was uncool to hang out with me. He still secretly watched over me and I knew that but anyway, the story is that his name was Taylor and I swore if I ever had a kid that I would name him or her Taylor," Meredith seemed to smile at the memory as she held on to her stomach. Derek smiled and grabbed her hand, squeezing it slightly.

"That's a nice story, of course if you want we can name one of them Taylor," he leaned up and kissed her gently, letting his lips rest against hers for a minute. She ran her fingers through his hair and pulled away slightly. She wiped the tears that formed in her eyes and smiled genuinely at him.

"I probably haven't ever said it but I'm glad you picked me," Meredith whispered, holding onto him.

"Picking you wasn't a question," he shook his head at her, laughing lightly. The moment was interrupted by a knock and the ultrasound tech came in to give the ultrasound.

It was pure silence as they got ready, the ultrasound was the only light in the room as the screen was pointed toward the tech. He didn't talk much, just rubbed the transducer over Meredith's stomach. Derek pulled Meredith's hand to his lips and placed a kiss on it before letting it back down.

"Well baby A is being a little shy today," the technician said as he tried moving the transducer more.

"Well what about baby B? They are identical so they are the same sex," Derek suggested. He was anxious to find out what they were.

"Yeah, I'll try that," the tech nodded as he moved it higher a bit. He didn't have an expression as he was looking.

"Looks like you're going to be parents to two healthy baby girls," he had a slight smile on his face as he turned the monitor so they could see.

"It's girls?" Meredith asked shocked. She was so sure she was having boys, it was surreal. Derek had a grin plastered across his face.

"Yes Ma'am, I can check baby A again but I am pretty positive it's girls," he asked and Meredith nodded. Even if she couldn't see, she wanted to see her babies. They made her happy, something she could never imagine herself saying out loud. She had fallen in love with these babies and all that mattered was that they were healthy.

Derek watched Meredith light up when the other baby came across the screen. He knew something had changed inside of her since the first ultrasound, he couldn't put his finger on it but he didn't care. He was happy that she was happy.

"We are having two girls Mer," he smiled as he kissed her forehead. He didn't care that he was going to be surrounded by girls, he was going to love all of his girls no matter what.

"Can we hear their heartbeat?" She asked and the tech nodded. He put the sound on from the machine and the rushing thumps came crashing from the speakers. Derek wiped a tear that came from his eye, his girls were all healthy and something about that made him extremely happy.

* * *

 **Author's Note: Oh my god, it's been two weeks since I've updated this and I feel so bad about it. I've been trying to write for my other story in my free time to finally update that one but with the little free time I have, it's hard finding time to write. I'll be posting another update for this one this Friday to make up for such a long wait, and I am thankful for those who stay for my hectic schedule.**

 **In the story, things are about to start picking up, as you found out the gender and the things that happened with Ellis. Derek's family is going to start to question things about Meredith and they want answers. This story has a lot of work to do and I can't wait to hear what you guys think about it! Thanks for reading!**


	11. Chapter 11

_Chapter VI_  
 _New soul_

 _I'm a new soul_  
 _I came to this strange world_  
 _Hoping I could learn a bit_  
 _Bout how to give and take_  
 _But since I came here_  
 _Felt the joy and the fear_  
 _Finding myself making every possible mistake_

* * *

"Derek, who's at the door?" Meredith said in shock as she wrapped the blanket around her naked body. Derek didn't have any neighbors and his trailer was the only place they had any alone time with Izzie and George living at her house.

"I don't know," Derek shrugged as he tried to pull her back down into the bed. He had a look of mischievous written all over his face. She shook her head at him, pulling her hand away.

"Derek please go look," she begged. He groaned as he climbed out of the bed and put on some boxers along with pajama pants. It was dark out so he couldn't really see if anyone was there. He suddenly heard the familiar voice call out his name and instantly panicked.

"Derek Christopher Shepherd! I know you are home, open this trailer door," the female voice knocked again. Derek gulped, looking at a panicked Meredith.

"It's my mother, get dressed," he hissed. Meredith felt her stomach flip instantly. She looked around for her clothes, only finding one of Derek's shirts and some of her pajama pants she had left her before. She quickly got dressed and managed to pull her hair up so she didn't look like they had just spent the last hour having sex.

"Ma!" Derek said nervously as he opened the trailer door to find his mother standing there.

"Is that all you are going to say to your mother? I fly all the way out to Seattle to spend some time with my son and meet his girlfriend and you're just going to stand there?" Carolyn Shepherd was a very strong willed woman, she waited for her son to say something in reply. She knew she was interrupting something but it didn't bother her one bit. She hadn't seen her baby boy in over 8 months and she was bound to get answers from him.

"Come in Ma, me and Meredith were just getting ready for bed," he lied slightly, stepping aside to let his mother into his trailer.

"Oh Derek, this trailer is pretty tiny for you and Meredith to raise my grand babies in," Carolyn said as she looked around, her eyes stopping on a very young woman, her hair looked messy and her figure was petite besides the baby bump that was on her stomach. Carolyn grinned, moving toward the figure.

"You must be Meredith, I am Carolyn Shepherd. It's very nice to finally meet the famous Meredith," Carolyn reached her arm out and shook Meredith's hand. Meredith's cheeks blush, her cheeky smile showed off her glow.

"Nice to meet you too Mrs. Shepherd," Meredith replied and Carolyn quickly corrected her.

"Call my Carolyn please," Carolyn smiled. Meredith looked at the older lady, she wasn't sure what to expect from Derek's mother but this was a lot what she thought she would look like. She had salt and pepper hair, Derek shared her nose and eye color.

"Ok, Carolyn," Meredith smiled.

"Anyway, just stopped by telling you two I was in town. I got a hotel room so I'll be seeing you two tomorrow?" Carolyn raised her eyebrows, staring down her son. He smiled and nodded in reply.

"Of course Ma. I wish you didn't have to stay in a hotel," Derek said, he wished he had more than the trailer but he didn't.

"Well she can stay at my house! We all can stay there!" Meredith suggested and she immediately regret her decision.

"Oh I couldn't be a bother," Carolyn said and Meredith just shook her head.

"No bother at all. Let me and Derek get dressed and we can all go over there together," Meredith said, not letting Carolyn disagree. Carolyn stepped outside and Derek turned to Meredith.

"What was that?" Derek hissed. He knew Meredith's house was in no shape for his mother to be staying there.

"You said it yourself, your mother shouldn't have to stay in a hotel room and I have an empty guest bedroom she can stay in. I'll just call Izzie and tell her to get the room and house ready," Meredith shrugged. She knew herself it was a bad idea but she couldn't back out of it now.

The both of them got dressed fairly quickly and Meredith called Izzie and told her to get he house ready and presentable for Carolyn, hiding all the booze and cleaning the house. The three of them got into Derek's truck, Meredith being the one to get in the back, and drove over to Meredith's house. Meredith was regretting her decision almost immediately as they drove in silence.

Carolyn talked to Derek about his sisters, informing him on the latest news. His youngest sister Amelia was preparing to take her boards, the most important test a doctor will ever take besides the intern exam. His other sister Lizzie was pregnant also, a little farther along then Meredith and it was a little boy. Kathleen was starting up her own practice which made Carolyn extremely proud. Nancy wasn't really mentioned in the conversation, Derek refused to ask about her because he knew how she probably went home and told their mother about Meredith and every problem he had.

It was awkward the rest of the drive with the silence in the air, a sigh of relief left Meredith when Derek pulled down her familiar street. A strike of panic came over her when she saw all the lights in the house out and Izzie's car was not in the driveway. She took a deep breath as she led Carolyn and Derek up to the house and inside.

The house was certainly cleaned and it even smelled like a nice home. Meredith smiled as she saw everything picked up and the house was clean compared to what she left it.

"This is my house," Meredith explained about her room mates and how they most likely wouldn't be in for the rest of the night due to their crazy hospital hours.

"Oh Meredith it's just so nice, it's a perfect family home," Carolyn hinted toward Derek and he just groaned. Derek and Mer showed Carolyn around the house and left her in the room she would be in to get ready for the night.

"Mer, you didn't have to do this," Derek said as they were alone in Meredith's room.

"Derek I wanted to, she is my kids grandmother and I want her to feel welcomed," she shrugged, grabbing some sleep pants from the drawer. Derek admired her growing bump as she was putting on her pajama's, she was glowing full on now, along with the baby bump.

"God I love you," he mumbled as he moved toward her, swiftly taking her into his arms and kissing her deeply.

"I love you too," she smiled and placed another kiss on his lips before pushing him away and pulling her side of the blankets down and got into the bed. She wasn't sure how long Carolyn would be staying but she did know that she wanted to get to know her while she was here.

* * *

 **Author's Note; Friday, as I promised! Ok so you have been introduced to Carolyn! I am really excited to finish the next chapter to this! I have started it and after last night's episode, I really needed the relief I got from working on this. Not spoiling anything but very done with Grey's Anatomy. I thought I would give it a chance but last night ruined it for me. Now Meredith and Derek can live happily in my head and in my fics. I am thankful for those who who review and to those even reading this! I don't know what I'd do without you wonder people. Hope you enjoyed and hopefully I'll get another update next week!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter XII**

 **What Hurts the Most**

 _Even though goin' on with you gone still upsets me_

 _There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay_

 _But that's not what gets me_

 _What hurts the most was being so close_

 _And havin' so much to say_

* * *

 **Author's Note: I cannot believe it has been over two months since I have updated this story. I am so sorry about that, I have been preparing for all my finals and now it is finals week and I made myself take a break from studying to write an update before having to write another paper. I am so sorry about not updating, I don't have any good excuses except school and writers block does not coincide together well. Anyway, I hope anyone who is still here enjoy's this update and I know it won't be too long before I update again. Much love.**

* * *

Meredith awoke to the aroma of pancakes in her room, she knew Izzie most likely wasn't cooking and her body was still nestled against Derek's so it couldn't be him. She suddenly remembered Carolyn was there and let out a deep groan. She snuggled deeper into his arms, she wasn't prepared to see his mother. It wasn't long before she felt Derek's breathing become faster. She felt his breath on her neck as he placed a kiss between her ear and collar bone.

"Mm, morning," he said in her ear.

"Morning. Your mother is cooking I think," she whispered back and he sighed a little.

"I know. I smell it. I hope you don't mind," he asked and she shook her head.

"Today is my last day off, I secretly wanna spend it here with you," she turned in his arms, taking his face into her hand.

"I know. I wish we could but I have to be in for a consult at 9," he sighed, placing a small kiss on her lips.

"I know," she pouted.

"You can spend the day getting to know my mother," he said and she groaned, burying her face into his chest.

"I'm not mother material, mothers don't like me," she mumbled and he chuckled.

"My mother is going to love you because I love you," he couldn't stop laughing. He knew his mother had to like Meredith, she was amazing and his mother always could tell how a person was when she met them.

"She doesn't have to."

"She will," he promised. He kissed the top of her head before getting up and searching for some of his pants.

"I'm going to shower and I'll be down after you," she said, still laying in the bed.

"Alright," he smiled at her tiny body surrounded by the blankets. He threw on some of his dress pants and a blue button up before going down. He saw the feast his mother had fixed and shook his head. Her famous waffles were just coming out of the waffle iron and some fresh bacon and eggs were sitting on plates.

"Morning Ma," he said, going to the pot of coffee and grabbing a travel mug.

"Good morning Derek. I hope Meredith won't mind I fixed breakfast, I just thought she would want some for the babies," Carolyn smiled at her son, shoving him toward the food.

"She won't at all, she loves food. I have to go to work so you two can do your thing or whatever," he shrugged, biting into a waffle. His health nut side of him was scream but he couldn't help but enjoy his mother's home cooking.

"Oh good!" Carolyn smiled, she was truly excited to really get to know her future daughter-in-law. Both Carolyn and Derek looked up as Meredith slowly walked into the room. Her hair still soaking wet from the shower and her face in a frown.

"The crematory called, my mother's ashes are ready," Meredith gulped. She didn't want to feel like that, especially in front of Carolyn but she didn't care.

"Mer. I can call in and tell them I can't come in today. You shouldn't go alone," Derek was quick to jump at the chance to stay home with her and make sure she was alright.

"No, it's not a big deal. You have to work and I can do it by myself," she sighed as she lifted herself into one of the stools by the island.

"I can't let you do that alone Mer," Derek argued.

"She won't, I'll go with her. I won't be a bother, just someone there in case you need someone," Carolyn suggested, a sympathetic smile on her face.

"Oh I can't make you do that Carolyn," Meredith replied, trying not to seem like she needed help at all.

"I want to do it sweetie. Besides, it gives me some time to get to know you a little," Carolyn replied like it wasn't a big deal. Meredith couldn't deny her offer so she agreed.

"Alright, are you sure you're ok Mer?" Derek asked in a whisper tone, his head close to hers. She nodded in response and he kissed the side of her head.

"I should probably get going," Derek said with a smile on his face. Meredith felt slightly hopeful that maybe spending some time with Carolyn would make her erase the opinion that Nancy set forth.

"Are you alright to drive because I can easily do that for you?" Carolyn offered, Meredith shook her head.

"No it's fine, I can drive," Meredith tried to smile, grabbing her car keys and purse. She didn't feel like eating, though it did seem rude not to. Carolyn went along with it, following Meredith out the door without any argument.

The ride to the crematory was silent, not even the car radio was playing music. Carolyn fought the urge to talk Meredith through it, she knew Meredith was a private person but all her emotions were shown through her eyes. Carolyn saw the sadness and hurt and she wanted to help but she knew that Meredith needed to open up first.

"So have you felt them move yet?" Carolyn asked, making light conversation about a safe subject.

"Yes, they move like crazy all the time. It's not much on the outside except sometimes, Derek has felt them move a few times," she had a smile on her face talking about the babies which made Carolyn smile also. She didn't know much about Meredith but she felt like Meredith was going to be a good mother for her grandchildren.

"That's good, Derek moved constantly. He always liked to get right on my bladder and just kick away," Carolyn chuckled at the fond memory. Meredith laughed also.

"Baby B does that, she especially loves to do flips," Meredith grinned then felt tension grew in the room. She remembered they hadn't told Carolyn that the babies were girls.

"You guys are having girls?" Carolyn smiled, she knew Derek would be an amazing father either way but she expected him to be better with girls.

"We are, we wanted to surprise you in a big way and now I ruined it and Derek is going to be so upset because he wanted to tell you. Oh can you act surprised when he tells you? God sometimes I can just be so absent minded and start rambling like I am now so I should probably just stop," Meredith rambled and Carolyn laughed loudly.

"I'm sorry dear, it's just Derek was right," Carolyn continued to chuckle and Meredith couldn't help but laugh along. This was bonding, she was actually bonding with her mother-in-law and wasn't wanting to run the entire time. It wasn't until they arrive at the crematory that Meredith started to get quiet again and back into her dark and twisty mood.

Carolyn stood back and watched how stiff Meredith became when she talked to the receptionist and someone came out, handing her a silver urn. Meredith showed her ID and signed a lot of papers and quickly bolted out as soon as she could. Carolyn's heart broke as she found Meredith outside in tears.

"Oh Meredith dear," Carolyn sat next to Meredith on the bench, her hand drew circles on her back and Meredith continued to cry but she felt comfort, Derek would do the same thing to comfort her which made it feel a little better.

"I don't even know why I'm sad. She was never a good mother to me, it was always about being extraordinary and she was always disappointed in me," Meredith confessed and Carolyn listened as she spilled her heart out about how bad Ellis was.

"Meredith dear, it's alright to be upset. Loosing a mother, whether she was huge part in your life or very absent, she was your mother and was there when no one else was. You loved her and I am sure she did love you," Carolyn continued to rub circles on her back and Meredith slowly turned and looked at Carolyn. She had never felt so much love from anyone other than Derek. Carolyn was genuine, she cared about her and she didn't even know much about her.

"You're right," Meredith croaked, her tears now drying up, "I'll be fine."

"You will be, because you are a very strong woman and you are loved," Carolyn smiled, causing Meredith to show a small smile.

"Let's get you home, I want to cook you something to help you feel better," Carolyn instructed, making Meredith get into the passenger while she drove them back to Meredith's house.

* * *

Derek didn't know why he was worried when he entered his house, the smell of food filled the house and two familiar voices chatted away in the kitchen. He variously entered the kitchen to see his mother stirring a pot while Meredith sat on one of the stools and was smiling.

"Hi dear, how was work?" Carolyn was the first to notice Derek.

"Great, how are you both?" He asked, sitting down his briefcase and placing a kiss on Meredith's head.

"Good, your mom was just telling me about how you and Mark had to shave your heads because you both put gum in each other's hair," Meredith giggled, Derek instantly smiled and put his arms around her and left his hands on her stomach.

"That's not even fair, Mark had started it!" He exclaimed, earning a laugh from Meredith and a head shake from Carolyn.

"Well I finished it, oh and remind me to tell you about..." Carolyn started to say before Derek stopped her.

"No more stories Ma!" He blushed slightly and Meredith shook her head.

"Lighten up Der, you were such a trouble maker!" Meredith laughed and Derek shook his head.

"No I was not, Mark was the one with all the idea's," he defended himself, pulling away from her slightly.

"Whatever, how was today?" He asked, talking about the crematory trip.

"I made it through, your mom is kind of great," Meredith praised Carolyn and she just shook her head.

"She's the strong one, I was just the driver," Carolyn said innocently, smiling at the two.

"Oh Carolyn, you're too kind. If you guys will excuse me, one of the little ones is on my bladder," she excused herself, leaving Derek and Carolyn alone.

"I never thought Addison was good for you, she was a good woman but not for you. She was too, well I can't think of the word but you guys just didn't fit but Meredith, she's the one. And before you start, I am saying this because she makes you genuinely happy and not just because she is bringing me two more grandbabies, she is truly a good person. Derek, I spent merely a day with her and I knew she was perfect, you see things differently than each other but in the end it makes the perfect pair. Never forget that son, she is special. Now before you go and say anything else, have this," she reached into her pocket and pulled out a velvet box, inside was a very small ring that was previously worn on Carolyn's finger years ago.

"Ma, this is your ring," he said as he tried to give it back.

"Your father gave me that ring and we agreed that when you found your true love, to give it to you and he would buy me another one that was much more extravagant. But now he isn't here but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have the ring to give to her, she's the one son," Carolyn grabbed her son and pulled him into an embrace. He wiped the tears that trickled down his face and he held on to his mother. He couldn't be more thankful that she saw Meredith for how amazing she was, and now he was sure that he could propose to her.


	13. Chapter 13

**_Author's Note; It's been so long since I've updated this and I am so so sorry! Life has just been so hectic lately, but I'll be able to start writing again soon but for now, here is chapter 13. It's shorter than I would like but nothing else more to say in this chapter. Thank you to those who have stuck by me,  
much love xx_**

* * *

 _Chapter VIII  
_ _Shake it out_

 _Regrets collect like old friends_  
 _Here to relive your darkest moments_  
 _I can see no way, I can see no way_  
 _And all of the ghouls come out to play_  
 _And every demon wants his pound of flesh_  
 _But I like to keep some things to myself_  
 _I like to keep my issues drawn_  
 _It's always darkest before the dawn_

* * *

"Meredith, you're on Dr Montgomery's service today," Bailey informed her and Meredith wanted to scream. She hadn't worked with Addison except once since she found out about her being pregnant. Addison didn't seem upset, she was actually easier to deal with now that she and Derek weren't constantly fighting.

"Thanks," Meredith replied dryly, walking slowly to the elevator. Her feet were already killing her and she had just started her shift. She had no idea how she was going to make it through the rest of day much less the rest her pregnancy with the swollen feet and the sore back.

She found Addison staring at a chart, her red hair hanging down in her face as she looked very concerned.

"Did you need me Dr Montgomery?" Meredith spoke up and Addison turned to look at her.

"Uh yes, I need you. I'm about to do a c-section on a mom who is 36 weeks and she's been contracting for two weeks and I stopped them for a little but the baby needs out now," Addison have her a small rundown on the case before handing the chart over to her to prep the patient for surgery.

"Molly Grey?" Meredith asked as she entered the room. The woman laying on the bed sat up and looked, her face showed how exhausted she was and Meredith suddenly felt scared herself.

"That's me, and this is my mom Susan," Molly said with a slight smile on her face. Susan was standing beside Molly was staring down Meredith as she entered the room.

"I'm Dr Grey, I am here to prep you for your c -section," Meredith smiled. She checked her vitals first.

"When am I going to get to see her?" Molly questioned Meredith to keep the silence from filling the room.

"Hard to say, as long as everything is fine then you can see her as soon as she comes out," Meredith smiled at the two women before continuing what she was doing.

"How far along are you?" Susan asked and Meredith looked up then back at her stomach.

"Uh 20 weeks. Not many people can tell," Meredith smiled, she felt a slight joy in knowing people could see her stomach now.

"I always know. Do you know the sex yet?" She asked and Meredith smiled.

"Two girls."

"Oh twins! That's nice. You're husband must be terrified," Susan smiled and Meredith shook her head.

"Not married but my boyfriend is extremely excited, surprisingly," she shrugged as she finished prepping Molly.

"I'm going to find Dr Montgomery so we can get this show on the road," Meredith smiled as she left the room. She felt tension inside that room and she wasn't sure why. It wasn't hard to find Addison and soon she was scrubbing into the OR. Susan stood beside Molly and it wasn't long until the baby was out but it was silent.

"Dr Grey, can you give me a hand?" Addison asked as she hurried the baby over to the incubator. She began doing chest compressions to try and get her to breathe.

"What's going on?" Susan asked worried as she stood up and walked toward them.

"The baby isn't breathing, we are going to do everything to fix it," Addison spoke up. Meredith froze, her stomach doing flips and the moving that was happening inside was not helping her at all.

"Is she going to be alright?" Molly cried and Meredith looked from the baby to Susan. The look on her face made Meredith cringe.

"We need to run some test," Meredith explained everything and Addison was quick to intubate the baby and move her out of the room.

"I'll update you as soon as I can," Meredith said as she ran out of the room to follow Addison.

"Grey, go update her chart and I'll come find you before anything else happens," Addison said, leaving a confused Meredith in the hallway. She slowly made her way back to the nurses station and grabbed Molly's chart.

Meredith stood against the nurse station, quietly trying to think about what had happened. She wrote all of her own notes down and her hand was unintentionally rubbing circles on her abdomen. She looked up when she heard an older man looking for Molly. Her heart jumped into her chest, the older man standing there was recognizable but it couldn't be who she thought it was. There was no way that he could be there and it suddenly clicked in her mind. Her flight instinct kicked in moments to late because he saw her and the look on his face was pure shock.

"Meredith?" He let out in one breath. She could see the guilty expression on his face as he moved closer to her and she was frozen in time.

"Thatcher."


	14. Chapter 14

**Second update for the day, I thought since I hadn't posted in so long and the chapter I posted today was so short, I would leave you with another update. Hope you enjoy xx**

* * *

 _Chapter VX_  
 _Fight song_

 _Like how a single word_  
 _Can make a heart open_  
 _I might only have one match_  
 _But I can make an explosion_  
 _And all those things I didn't say_  
 _Wrecking balls inside my brain_  
 _I will scream them loud tonight_  
 _Can you hear my voice this time?_

* * *

"Thatcher," Meredith repeated his name. She was numb from the shock of seeing her father, a man she hadn't seen since she was 5 years old.

"You've grown up," he breathed and Meredith snapped out of her daze. She felt the anger rush over her as he stared at her, not even realizing he was staring at her stomach.

"That's what happens when you abandon someone for twenty five years," she spat, he started to speak before she turned around and rushed off. She couldn't believe it, she had been treating her father's _other_ child. She felt disgust in knowing that his wife and daughter didn't even know her but it didn't surprise her, he just disappeared and she hadn't seen him since she was five.

Her head clearly clouded as she reached the only place she felt like she wanted to be, knocking on Derek's office door. She opened it and found him sitting, reading over the newest medical journal.

"Mer," his face lit up but came crashing down when he saw the distress on her face.

"God how can I be so stupid?" She cursed herself, slamming the door and sitting on the couch in his office. He got up and hurried over to her, sitting down beside her.

"What's the matter Mer?" He asked curiously, looking at the anger that burned inside her.

"Thatcher is what's the matter," she huffed, crossing her arms and resting them on top of her stomach.

"Your father?" Derek was confused. She didn't talk about her father, she knew he still lived in Seattle but she hated bringing him up, she blamed him for everything that went wrong.

"He's not my father. He is Molly's father. Ok well I guess he is my father but he isn't! I can never call that man my father because he hasn't been in my life long enough to earn the title of being a father! He will never be my father," she rambled, all the steam releasing from years of anger and resentment toward him.

"Wait, he's here?" Derek asked, confused as how she found out she had a sister.

"He is. And I'm on Molly's case so I can't avoid him forever," she pouted. She knew deep down she had to face her fears and talk to him but she found it hard because of all the anger she still had in her.

"Mer, you were going to have to talk to him eventually, and you have a sister?" He asked and she looked at him slyly.

"Two actually. And they aren't my sisters," she rolled her eyes. They sure as hell were not her sisters.

"Actually Mer," he started but was interrupted by the sound of a pager. Meredith looked down at hers and wanted to throw it across the room.

"Addison is calling," she groaned, standing up and kissing him quickly before she rushed off. She found her in the NICU, getting the baby settled in.

"Yes Dr Montgomery," Meredith said breathlessly stopping and looking down at the fragile baby.

"We are going to have to go back in and operate on her, but we need to update the family on her condition," Addison informed her and Meredith secretly groaned. She was hoping that once Addison found out that she was considered family, she couldn't work on the case anymore.

Meredith nodded and followed her to the room. Molly was crying still and Susan was by her side along with Thatcher. Meredith cringed at the sight, she didn't understand why she had a sudden wave of jealousy flow over her. He wasn't even her father, he never was her father.

"Dr Montgomery! Is my baby going to be alright?" Molly asked, and Addison kept her poker face on. Meredith noticed how Susan and Molly's demeanor hadn't changed toward her, they didn't know who she was. That mad her blood boil, Thatcher didn't even tell his new family about her.

"We ran some test and found that her intestines aren't attached correctly and we have to go in and fix it," As the words left Addison's mouth, Molly began to cry hysterically.

"My baby is going to die," she cried and Thatcher held her, letting her cry into him.

"Not that I can help, we just need your consent to do the surgery and we can get her fixed," Addison said kindly, handing her consent forms. Meredith stood, feeling like a stranger intruding on an intimate moment. She felt the anger boiling at her surface. Addison began to leave and Meredith was quick to follow.

"I'm not going to need your hands in the OR so I want you to keep the family updated," Addison said and Meredith couldn't argue. She wouldn't win in the argument and her head was already pounding, no use in making it worse.

And Meredith did as she was told, each hour on the hour she would go and update Molly about the baby. It took longer than expected but the baby made it out of surgery. Meredith went along with Addison to share the news.

"She's doing good," Addison informed Molly and Susan, "She is stable and Susan can go and see her if she would like."

"When can I see her?" Molly asked.

"It will be a few days. We have to make sure she doesn't develop an infection with both of you having surgery and all," Addison explained.

"Oh, I don't want to see her without Molly," Susan said, rubbing Molly's head.

"No Mom, she needs someone and I'll have daddy here," she said and Meredith's stomach turned upside down. She called him daddy. She was a grown woman who just had a baby and she still called her father daddy.

"Are you sure?" Susan asked once more and Molly nodded.

"Alright, Dr Grey will take you to see her in the NICU," Addison smiled and left. Meredith took Susan to see the infant and showed her how to put on the protective clothing.

Susan gasp as she looked at the baby that was hooked up to all the machines and smiled. Meredith sat back and watched the interaction.

"Beautiful, isn't she?" Susan looked at Meredith as they both were standing there alone together.

"Yeah," Meredith had to agree, she was sort of cute besides the wires. Meredith began to walk out before Susan spoke up.

"Thatcher told me who you were when he got her, I couldn't believe it. The last time I saw you, you were just tiny," Susan said and Meredith stopped immediately.

"You knew about me?" Meredith asked, she tried to keep herself calm.

"Of course I knew, Thatcher loved you very much. Molly and Lexie don't know, Lexie was just a baby when your mother moved you two to Boston," Susan said, obviously taking up for Thatcher.

"What is that suppose to mean?" Meredith asked angrily. She barely knew Susan but she assumed Susan was a nice person, she hoped she wasn't wrong.

"It means there is two sides to every story. Ellis was a force to be reckoned with," Susan laughed slightly, causing Meredith's blood to boil even more.

"I know how my mother was, she was my only family," she replied coldly, her mother was in fact a force of nature but that didn't mean Meredith wasn't thankful for the little she did for her.

"Meredith, I'm not trying to intrude on your life and become your new mother but I just wanted to say that we can be your family too you know?" Susan said and with that, Meredith didn't know how to react. The mother instinct wanted to give them a chance, to have a family again. But then the dark and twisty wanted to just run and never look back.

Meredith slowly walked out of the room, Susan's words playing over and over in her head. She replayed them as she got out of her scrubs and into normal clothes and as she drove to her house. She had to tell Derek, he would know what to do.

She made it up the stairs and into her bedroom where Derek was laid on the bed with a book in his hands. He looked up at her and put the book down, intrigued by the look of confusion on her face.

"Susan said there are two sides to the story," she said as she plopped down on the bed. Derek was utterly confused, realizing she was talking about her childhood.

"Well, maybe there is," he shrugged, putting his hand on her stomach.

"She wants to get to know me, she and Thatcher. She said that I could be apart of their family," she breathed, her head spinning from the turn of events.

"What do you want to do?" He asked, rubbing her belly. He was eager to feel the babies movements so he would always try and touch her stomach.

"What should I do?" She confessed. She was truly lost for words.

"It can't hurt to try?" He suggested and they sat in silence for a moment. Derek suddenly gasp and a large smile spread across his face as he looked up at Meredith.

"I think that's the answer," he smiled, rubbing her belly to encourage more movement. Meredith sat there and contemplated, she was actually thinking about giving her father's family a chance.


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's note; Another month since I've updated, I'm such a bad writer. Anyway, so sorry guys and thanks again for those who have stuck with me. I am trying my hardest to write, it's just hard for me to find time with work and keeping a decent social life. Hopefully I'll be able to pre-write and post chapters weekly soon. Much love and enjoy xx**

* * *

 _Chapter XV_

 _Just Keep Breathing_

 _Without the dark the light won't show_

 _Remember that you're not alone_

 _When you watch the world just turn away_

 _And break the promises you have made_

 _When love is all too hard to hold_

 _Just take a breath and let it go_

* * *

"Oh god, this was such a bad idea," Meredith was in panic mode. She had no idea why she had agreed to have dinner with Thatcher and Susan. She held on to her stomach, grateful her girls won't ever have to go through anything like she is right now.

"Mer, it's alright, I'll be right there with you," Derek coached, he finished buttoning the buttons on his shirt.

"No it's not Derek, and I have nothing to wear!" Meredith groaned as she searched through all her clothes. Being 22 weeks pregnant, her jeans no longer fit right since her bump had really defined itself in the last week and most of her favorite sweaters were tight.

"I've told you that you should go shopping for maturity clothes," he shrugged, she growled slightly and rolled her eyes.

"Why would I do that when I spend 60 hours a week in scrubs and the rest in sweatpants," she growled, grabbing the only pair of black leggings she owned and pulled them on.

"Alright fine," he didn't want to argue with her.

"I'm wearing one of your shirts," Meredith smirked, grabbing one of the twenty blue button up shirts and pulled it over her shoulders.

"You are going to need to get your own clothes," Derek rolled his eyes, fixing his fluffy curls. Meredith joined him, now dressed and she finished fixing her hair the best she could. The babies were going crazy in her stomach, maybe it was her nerves causing them to go insane but she was not enjoying.

"Will you please tell your girls to stop kicking my ribs," she groaned in pain, she didn't know how painful it was when all the other women talk about how amazing it is to feel their baby move. It was uncomfortable and there wasn't anything to do about it.

Derek chuckled, running his hand over her stomach before leaving the bathroom and downstairs. Meredith was right behind him, she was ready to go and get this over with. She didn't know why exactly she needed to go hear her father's explanation but she did hope it would give her closure. They rode in silence to a house not far from where Meredith's house, it sort of made her upset to know he was so close to her childhood home and never bothered to reach out.

"Is it rude that we didn't bring anything?" Meredith asked Derek as he parked the car. He just shrugged.

"I think so, I don't know. I always bring wine but that's kind of silly with you being pregnant," he got out and went around to open her door, taking her hand as they walked to the front door. She held his hand tightly, waiting for someone to answer the door. Her nerves were really going crazy right now and she didn't know what to do except hold on to Derek.

"Hi Meredith, come in," Susan opened the door, allowing Derek and Meredith to enter. The first thing Meredith noticed was their foyer filled with tons of pictures of the family.

"Hi Susan, this is Derek Shepherd. He's my boyfriend, Derek this is Susan," Meredith introduced the two, she looked around at the pictures. One in particular stood out to her, it was on the shelf in a brown frame and inside was a picture of a young Thatcher holding a baby in one arm with a toddler on his lap.

"Nice to meet you Derek," Susan smiled as she shook his hand.

"The pleasure is mine, your house is really nice," he smiled his McDreamy smile and Susan just smiled back. She saw Meredith eyeing the picture on the shelf and she smiled.

"That's you and Lexie, our oldest," Susan said and Meredith looked at her confused.

"I don't remember this," Meredith admitted, now picking up the picture and taking a closer look. She didn't have many pictures of her from when she was younger but she was certain this was her.

"You were only three, I have a lot more that I can show you after dinner," Susan tried to be friendly. Meredith smiled awkwardly and nodded before returning to Derek's side.

"Susan! Are they here?" Thatcher asked as he walked in, he was very awkward in his stature and he had a huge smile on his face.

"Hi Thatcher," Meredith smiled as she held out her hand for him. He just smiled and shook her hand.

"Thatcher, this is Derek, Derek this is my father, Thatcher."

Derek smiled, shaking hands with Thatcher also. They began talking about dinner and Meredith just followed them through the house to the dining room.

"I hope you like chicken," Susan said as she sat down at one of the five chairs.

"Oh there's five places, is Molly coming?" Meredith asked, Molly was sweet and very kind, she liked Molly.

"Oh no dear, I forgot to mention that Lexie is joining us," Susan said and Meredith felt the tension grow. She wasn't sure if she was ready to meet Lexie, again apparently.

"Not at all," Meredith cleared her throat, sitting down and motioning for Derek to sit next to her.

"I'm going to go grab some of the food from the kitchen, you guys chat," Susan excused herself, leaving Meredith and Derek alone with Thatcher.

"So Derek, what do you do?" Thatcher asked, making the conversation light.

"I'm the Head of Neuro at Seattle Grace," Derek smiled, taking a sip of the water that was on the table.

"Oh a surgeon, that's good. Meredith, you must be in your third or fourth year of residency now," Thatcher asked, earning a questioning look by Meredith.

"Oh no, just an intern. I got a late start, took a couple of years off school to travel Europe," she shrugged, drinking the water also.

"Oh that's good. So when are you due? Uh, Susan told me that you were pregnant," he clarified.

"Oh. Well I got a few more months to go," she smiled awkwardly, she felt safe as long as Derek was in some way touching her.

"That's good, well congratulations," he smiled. It was silent until a young woman walked into the dining room, presumably Lexie. She was tall and slender, she hard dark brown hair and looked to be only a few years younger than Meredith.

"Hi dad," Lexie smiled as she went over and hugged Thatcher.

"Lexie, thanks for coming. Lex, this is Meredith and Derek," Thatcher introduced them, Derek smiled and shook her hand and Meredith just kept a straight face.

"Ah Meredith, my long not-so lost big sister," Lexie joked, and Meredith laughed a little.

"Yes, nice to see you again I guess," Meredith shrugged, she didn't remember Lexie but according to Susan, they had met before.

"I was barely a year old when you moved away with your mom so it's alright to say we just met," Lexie joked, the room fell silent again.

"Who's hungry?" Susan asked as she entered the room again. She sat down the food and let everyone fix their own plate. Small conversation about Derek was talked during dinner. The conversation shifted and they spoke about Thatcher and his recent research.

"So I'm going to get these dishes cleaned and then I'll show you all the pictures from when you use to come over," Susan smiled and Meredith was quick to help grab some of the plates.

"I got to be going, I'm going out with some of my old friends and catching up," Lexie said as she got up, hugging and kissing her mother and father.

Meredith helped Susan in the kitchen, cleaning up and doing the dishes.

"That was so awkward and horrible, I'm sorry I'm not sure what to say," Meredith felt herself starting to ramble and she shut up.

"It's alright Meredith. It's been a long time, he was actually more scared than you think," Susan chuckled at that.

"Really? Because I was terrified. I mean he's my father and I always grew up resenting him for being there and leaving me with my mother," she confessed.

"Oh Meredith, you do know that he loves you so much, even now. He was scared that you hated him for what he couldn't help, Ellis was a strong woman and when she wanted it a certain way, it had to be that way," Susan confessed and Meredith nodded. She knew it was true, her mother was a evil woman and everything was always the way she wanted it.

"I did, hate him I mean. But now I can't, he's my father and he's here and he's trying. I can't change the past but I want to try," Meredith confessed. Susan smiled, taking Meredith by surprise as she hugged her.

In the living room, Derek and Thatcher sat down on the couch. They talked a little about fishing but the conversation soon hit a turn.

"How do you think it went?" Thatcher asked his opinion.

"Well, it's hard to say. You were both nervous and to me it seemed good but Meredith, she's complicated. She's tough, she tries to hide her feelings. If you make an effort to get to know her, you won't regret it."

Derek kept a smile on his face, letting Thatcher process the words that Derek said. It wasn't long before a smiling Meredith and Susan made their way into the room. Susan held a giant red book that seemed to be filled with pictures. Meredith sat beside Derek, almost too close, and Susan sat beside her. She opened the book to the first page and it was filled with pictures of a baby Meredith with Thatcher.

"When your mother and I divorced, I took a lot of the pictures of us together," Thatcher admitted, telling her where each picture was taken. Meredith almost cried when she saw a picture of Thatcher holding her when she was an infant. It was overwhelming, she had always thought her father never cared and that is why he left but in reality, there was a huge story behind it and she wanted to know.

"That's my favorite," Susan pointed to a picture of Meredith smiling widely and holding a baby that must be Lexie.

"You were a proud big sister," Thatcher added, Meredith look at both of them and back at Derek.

"You were a cute kid Mer," Derek smiled, looking back down at the album.

"I was, thank you for this," Meredith closed the album and handed it to Susan.

"Oh no problem, I am just glad we got the chance to show you," Susan grinned, setting the album on the coffee table.

"It's getting late, I think we should get going. I had a great time, thanks again for this," Meredith stood up, hugging Susan and then Thatcher. She felt odd, she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. They said their goodbye's, then the two of them left.

"How are you?" Derek asked, wanting a honest answer. He knew she was freaking out but he wanted to know why.

"I'm fine. I don't know what I want to do right now but I have to just focus on the intern exam and these babies," she admitted, biting her tongue from saying everything she wanted. She was clueless, she wasn't sure she could trust Thatcher and Susan. She wanted to but she couldn't.

They pulled up to the house, very confused on why the lights were on inside. Meredith got out, going inside to find George moving boxes and Izzie freaking out.

"What is going on?" Meredith asked, trying to figure out what was happening.

"I'm moving out, I think it's for the best since I'm married now and you are pregnant. The babies can have my room," George confessed, trying to go back upstairs before Meredith could freak out.

"What! George when did you get married?" Meredith screamed, she had no idea what was happening but she didn't like it.

"A couple days ago. I'm happy Mer," he said, Meredith couldn't argue. Izzie continued to try and convince him to stop, and it was a mistake but he wasn't listening.

"I'm happy for you George, now excuse me, I have to be up early in the morning," Derek said, leaning down to place a kiss on Meredith's forehead and he went upstairs.

"Izzie, calm down please. George is a big boy," Meredith begged, she really didn't feel like fighting tonight.

"Fine," she said as she stomped upstairs like a child.

"George, I wish you and Callie the best. Now I'm exhausted so please keep the noise down," she bypassed the boxes and went upstairs. She knew she would have to deal with the fallout tomorrow but she had too much on her mind to care.


	16. Chapter 16

**Author's Note: Hey guys! Sorry it took so long to update, I'm just start back my classes and I have such a busy schedule between work and classes so I am trying my best, just hang in there and I will finish this story even if it takes me forever (let's hope it won't) thanks xo**

* * *

 _Chapter XVI_

 _You save me_

 _Every now and then_

 _I get a little lost_

 _My strings get all tangled_

 _My wires get all crossed_

 _Every now and then_

 _Right up on the edge_

 _Dangling my toes over the ledge_

* * *

Meredith walked down the hall, a stack of flash cards in one hand and a large pile of old cases in the other. Her mind raced, she was too worried about studying for her intern exam than she was about the utterly bad feeling she had in her stomach. The babies were kicking rapidly, constantly, and it was starting to get more irritating the less sleep she had.

"Meredith! There you are!" Izzie said breathlessly. Izzie had became extra annoying around the house since George moved out, constantly baking and trying to convince everyone she wasn't upset. She followed Meredith and Cristina around all the time.

"What is it Izzie," Meredith said, sounding more agitated than she actually was.

"What's the matter with you?" Izzie asked, sounding offended.

"It's nothing," Meredith cursed as she finally got to a stopping point as she sat down everything in her arms and reluctantly clutching her stomach.

"Mer are you alright?"

"No Iz, my feet are so swollen and my back is killing me, The intern exam is in less than three weeks, and I'm pregnant so no Izzie," she felt herself feeling dizzy.

"What's going on?" Derek asked coming up behind Meredith, putting his arms on her shoulders and trying to keep her from freaking out.

"I'm sorry Mer," Izzie said, feeling worse than she already did. She began to hurry off.

"Iz, wait!" Meredith called after her, she began to try and walk after her and suddenly she felt the room spinning. She felt her body began to give as she fell back.

"Mer," Derek quickly grabbed her before she had fell, he tried his best to shake her awake but instead she laid in his arms, her breathing seemingly normal but something else was wrong.

* * *

"Der..." Meredith said groggily, she didn't remember much that had happened. She felt the wire connected to her arm along with the wires to her chest. She had no idea what had happened and a feeling of guilt rushed over herself as she moved her arm to her stomach.

"You're awake," Derek said in relief. His eyes rimmed with red along with the dark circles around his eyes.

"How long have I been out? Are the babies alright?" She gulped, she got worried when he didn't answer right away.

"I don't know, they are alive and safe but Mer you have pushed yourself too much," he expressed his worries that have been in his stomach for months now. He knew she was taking too much on and with everything, the only thing he wanted for her was the babies to be safe.

"What are the doctors saying?" She groaned, her head still spinning and she was unsure of the events.

"Nothing yet. God Mer, you scared me half to death. You can't do that again," he said with a stern look on his face.

"I don't even know what happened, I didn't mean to," she practically screamed back. She felt all her defenses flying up. She looked him dead in the eye, both their eyes shared the fear and worry of what could be wrong with their babies. Derek reached over and took her hand, squeezing it gently for comfort.

"I'm sorry. I know you didn't have any control but I'm scared for you and those little ones," he leaned up and kissed her forehead, placing his other hand on her stomach between the two heart monitors and rubbed the small area he had access to.

"I know and I should have yelled. This is kind of my fault, I've been so stressed lately about the situation with my father and now George is married and the intern exam is in three weeks," she cried slightly, Derek was quick to wipe the tears as he smoothed her hair.

"No Mer, you can't blame yourself."

"But Derek, I can because it is my fault I'm here."

"Meredith, everyone is stressed right now and the babies are fine. You can't blame yourself anymore," he assured her, not letting her fight back. Both their heads turned to the door as Addison came inside with her chart in hand.

"Addison, where is Dr. Collins?"

"She is off today and I was the on call OB, any problem?" Addison asked, looking up from Meredith's chart.

"No."

"Alright. So from the test we had ran, all the signs are point to the early stages of preeclampsia. We caught it early which is a good thing but I also want to stress that you need to take it easy Meredith. And before you argue, yes I know the intern exam is in a few weeks but you need to just take it easy. Make rounds, do the pit, run labs, and study," Addison said more as an order than a suggestion.

"Addison, that's not fair."

"Meredith, life isn't fair and if you want these babies to stay in there and live then you want to take my advice. Now I want to do an ultrasound to make sure everything is fine," Addison instructed, grabbing the ultrasound machine and pulling it into position at her side. Derek watched in awe as the baby came across the screen. He couldn't help but smile and leaned over, kissing Meredith's forehead. Derek looked over at Addison and he knew what that look on her face meant. He studied the ultrasound, he hadn't had to read one of those since residency and he couldn't tell anything really. All he saw were his two girls, his perfect little angels.

"Addison, what's up?" Derek asked curiously.

"Is something wrong?" Meredith asked, noticing the concern growing on Addison's face.

"When you had the anatomy scan, did they tell you anything about the sizes of the babies?" Addison asked, her eyes stayed on the ultrasound as she continued to investigate what she saw.

"They said Baby B was measuring about a week behind Baby A and to come back in a few weeks to make sure but I just never got the chance. I was going to wait until after the exam so I could put my worry to rest. Addison is something wrong?" Meredith asked, almost in tears. She couldn't let something happen to their babies because she didn't need the extra stress.

"Baby A is measuring at 25 weeks and 2 days while baby B is measuring 23 weeks and 6 days. I'm looking right now and I don't see anything specifically wrong other than the size differences. No shared blood vessels which rules out twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome but I don't know what's causing this size abnormality, one thing I can be glad is that they have apparently both grown from your last appointment so nothing major should be wrong. You need to come in next week to make sure they're growth difference has become even longer," Addison said as she cut off the ultrasound. Both of them sat silent, Meredith rubbed the gel off her stomach and held her hand over her belly.

"Now you need to take the next couple of days to recover and get your blood pressure at a decent level and I am putting you on strict bed rest for the next 48 hours, no leaving bed for any reason except to use the bathroom, then after that you will stay home on modified bed rest until next week when you come back and see me," Addison said and Meredith agreed. She left and the two of them stayed silent, maybe they were in shock but whatever it was caused Meredith to start crying.

"This is all my fault, if I wouldn't be so worried about that stupid exam and payed more attention to my health then maybe they would be the same size," she said as she wiped her eyes. She has always hated crying, especially in front of people but she couldn't hold it in.

"Meredith, this was bound to happen. It was happening weeks ago, we just didn't think it was a big deal because the other doctor said not worry and we didn't."

"I don't want her on my case anymore. No if anyone is my doctor, I want Addison. She's the best."

"Are you sure?" He asked, look at her with worry.

"Positive," she nodded as she sat up. All she knew is that she wanted to go home and rest, and study. As she sat up, she felt the flutters in her stomach start again and she couldn't help but smile.

"Baby A is so active," Meredith laughed as she put her hand on her moving belly.

"My future soccer star," he smiled as he kissed Meredith's forehead as she rolled her eyes.

"So the agreement is you go home and rest and I'll take the rest of the day off just to make sure you rest," Derek said seriously pulling away from her.

"Derek, no. You are working and I swear I'll stay put in bed all day until you get home."

"Meredith no. I will come back to work tomorrow but today I need time with you to keep myself sane," he gave her a stern look and she just agreed, she couldn't fight him anymore today.

They got their things and Derek forced her to use a wheelchair to the car, she sat unhappily with her arms crossed all the way home. One thing she hated was being treated like a child and that is exactly what she felt like right now.

"Mer, stop pouting. I know it's not what you wanted but this is how it has to be," he knew she was upset but he hated seeing her like that.

"I'm fine."

"No you aren't."

"I am. See, happy and smiling," she gave him a fake smile and he groaned and shook his head.

"What do you want to eat? I'll fix you anything," he asked as they were almost to her house.

"I don't care. Just food of any kind," she held her stomach as it made a low growl. She didn't remember what exactly she ate today and it kind of scared her. She realized that she hadn't been taking care of herself like she should be and she needed to really fix that.

"I'll make pasta carbonara," he smiled over at her and her mouth started watering in itself.

"Yes please," she smiled and laid her head back against the headrest. They arrived at her house and she went to her room as agreed and Derek stayed downstairs to cook their dinner. It wasn't long before he arrived in her room with two plates full of pasta carbonara and she couldn't help but fall in love with him even more.

"For my favorite woman and two girls," he smiled as he handed her the plate.

"We all thank you so much," she smiled before starting to shovel the pasta into her mouth, moaning slightly as the sauce hit her taste buds.

"So I'm gonna stay the night tonight and for the next few nights, until you get off bed rest at least," he smiled as he watched her devour the food.

"I was thinking, why don't you just move in? It's not like you aren't here all the time anyway and then we can start decorating the nursery which is going to be in George's room since he moved out instead of the tiny room all the way down the hall," she shrugged and he looked at her dumbfounded.

"Seriously? What about the trailer?" He questioned.

"You'll keep it of course, use it as a getaway spot from all the estrogen. We can use the land later, to build us a house because I don't want to live here forever," she shrugged and he just continued to be surprised by her words.

"Alright. I guess I'll move in," he smiled and she rolled her eyes.

"You can stop looking at me like that," she laughed as she continued to eat.

"Sorry, just surprised by all this. Meredith Grey you never seize to amaze me," he chuckled and thought about the ring his mother gave him. He knew she would soon be ready for the next step but until then he would keep it to himself.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Note; I updated before another month passed? I'm just as surprised I had time to right this as you are. Alright so I feel like no one is reading this story anymore due to the lack of reviews and it really makes me sad because I love this story so much and I love writing for it so if you're out there, please review. Even if it's just a guest, it will make my day! Happy reading.**

* * *

 _Chapter XVII_

 _Look after you_

 _There now, steady love,_

 _so few come and don't go_

 _Will you won't you,_

 _be the one I always know?_

 _When I'm losing my control,_

 _the city spins around_

 _You're the only one who knows,_

 _you slow it down_

* * *

Meredith shifted in the bed, her growing belly made it harder to get comfortable sitting up. She had already read through all the cases Cristina brought over for her to study and she had come to terms with the fact that the babies loved when she read out loud so she had to read to them in order for them to calm inside her stomach. It was only 3:00 pm and Derek wasn't suppose to be home for another two hours and she was bored out of her mind. She felt for all the mother's who had to be put on bed rest, she was only on the second day and she still had to finish off the week basically being home bound, she was thankful she could get off strict bed rest the following day.

"Izzie! Can you bring me a bottle of water," Meredith yelled loudly, thankful that Izzie had the day off. She had been downstairs baking away her problems with George which Meredith didn't understand at all, he and Callie were happy so she was happy for him.

"Here, and try this," she brought along a chocolate cupcake with some type of icing on the top. Meredith bit into the cupcake and it tasted like the four others she had brought up earlier.

"Iz, it taste the same," Meredith mumbled with her mouth full.

"No, it shouldn't. I added more coconut oil," Izzie groaned as she threw herself on the bed.

"Just call whoever has the original recipe," Meredith shrugged, finishing off the cupcake.

"No, I will figure it out," Izzie huffed and they both looked puzzled at each other when there was a knock at the door.

"Who could that be?" Izzie questioned

"I have no idea, go check," Meredith shrugged as Izzie disappeared. She heard noises coming from downstairs, unable to really hear any words being spoken. She thought for a minute before curiosity overtook her and she carefully removed herself from the bed. She slowly made it down the stairs, one at a time. She heard a familiar voice as she made it to the kitchen, stunned at who had came.

"Meredith, I know I should have called first but I thought I would surprise you and kind of help out," the woman shrugged as she places multiple grocery bags on the counters.

"Susan, this is nice of you but really I can't accept all this," she looked at mounds of groceries on the island.

"It's no big deal, really. Anyway I wanted to help since you are kind of my step daughter," she smiled sweetly and Meredith almost corrected her before she heard Derek's voice in her head telling her maybe to give them a chance.

"Yeah. Alright. Thank you so much," Meredith smiled back and looked at Izzie who was putting away the groceries.

"I know it's overstepping a little but I thought well I thought this could start building a bridge," Susan shrugged slightly, nervously shifting.

"My mother was only overbearing, never was she overprotective and it's gonna take some getting use to so really, it's ok," Meredith assured her and they both shared a smile.

"Thank you Meredith," Susan said with a smile.

"Yes, now I'm going to go back and sit down and you two can do whatever," Meredith slowly wobbled to the living room and laid down on the couch. After a good ten minutes, Susan came from the kitchen with a cup of tea and she sat it down on the coffee table.

"I'm going to be going, and I'm sorry again for the overstepping. I'll be sure to call before I come again," Susan said with a smile, Meredith thanked her before she left. Izzie made her way into the room again.

"That was nice of you Mer, I'm proud," Izzie complimented her.

"I guess it was. This pregnancy has changed my point of view on a lot of things including family. Call your mom Iz."

"Mer, really I will figure this out," Izzie groaned and Meredith shook her head.

"It will make you feel better Iz," Meredith told her.

"I'm really done talking about her," Izzie rolled her eyes before leaving. Meredith sat there and shook her head. She dozed off and on until Derek got him. He came in and kissed her forehead, she sat up and changed her position to give him room to sit.

"How was your day?" He asked, Sitting down next to her.

"It was good, Susan stopped by with groceries," she said casually.

"She did? What did you say?" He was shocked by her revelation.

"Nothing really, we just talked and I realized that you were right. I have to give them a chance to really explain what happened when I was a child."

"Mer, I'm proud of you," he smiled and leaned over to kiss her again. She laughed and leaned in for another kiss.

"I know. I don't know what has gotten into me, I feel like everything has changed and I find myself dreaming about the future," she shrugged and he looked at her in awe.

"You're happy Mer, and I'm glad you are realizing this because this means you will be the most amazing mother to our two beautiful daughter's," he smiled and placed his hand on her stomach.

"Enough about me, how about you? How was work?" She asked, changing the subject. She missed surgery so much, though this time off had gave her time to study she still missed it.

"Great, I did two craniotomy's and both patient's are doing great," he went into detail of how the surgeries went and she just watched him, in a daze by his amazing glow when he talked about surgery. She could think of a million things that could go wrong but she didn't want to think about that because every time she looked at him, she fell more in love with him. She couldn't imagine her life without him.


	18. Chapter 18

_Chapter XVIII_

 _Unsteady_

 _Hold, hold on, hold onto me_

 _'Cause I'm a little unsteady_

 _A little unsteady_

 _Hold, hold on, hold onto me_

 _'Cause I'm a little unsteady_

 _A little unsteady_

* * *

Meredith sat there, her foot tapping rapidly against the tiles. Derek looked over at the nervous wreck that was sitting next to him, he placed his hand on her knee and she stopped to look at him. Unspoken words between the two and Meredith just smiled, putting her hand over his and grabbing it.

"Meredith Grey," the nurse said and they both stood up, she grabbed his hand for support as they walked with the nurse to the exam room. She sat down on the table and looked around the room. She never got a chance to really look at all the detail items that were in the OB exam rooms.

"It's going to be alright Mer," Derek said encouragingly, grabbing one of the chairs and sitting it beside the exam table.

"I hope so, I don't know what I'm going to do if things aren't good," she sighed, trying to hold back the tears. She did everything Addison said to do, she stayed in bed most of the day with the exception of going down to eat or the bathroom.

"Are you sure you can take the intern exam later?" He asked, the only opening Addison had this week was the day of the intern exam, which was both a convenience and and inconvenience.

"Yes Derek, of course. I am prepared. I studied and worked too hard to miss it," she stated bluntly. She hated to say it but this could make or break her career. She couldn't imagine having to start fresh with a new set of interns.

"Alright, I just don't think you need the added stress," he confessed and she shot him an angry glare.

"Well I don't think it's really a concern of yours right now," she stated before turning her head from him. She immediately regretted what she had said, he longing silence in the room killed her. Nothing was said again until Addison appeared in the room with the portable ultrasound machine.

"Good morning Meredith, how are you feeling?" Addison asked, feeling the tension in the room between the pair.

"Fine. They are both moving and I haven't really had any problems," she stated, laying back and pulling her shirt up to reveal the baby bump. It had gotten larger and Addison noted that before she sat down and felt around on her stomach.

"You're stomach has grown which means they have grown which is good," Addison said as she grabbed the transducer and the cool gel, rubbing it across Meredith's abdomen. Addison immediately started taking measurements and studying the ultrasound. Both Meredith and Derek enjoyed seeing their babies on the screen. Baby A was sucking her thumb and Meredith pointed it out to Derek which lead him to grab her hand and smile at her, a silent apology exchanged between the two.

"Well the good news is that they both have grown, though they still have about two week size difference, Baby A is measuring 26 weeks and 6 days while Baby B is measuring 24 weeks and 5 days. They are healthy and growing. I don't see any problems with you going back to work after the vacation from the intern exam," Addison said as she cleaned off Meredith's stomach.

"So I'm good? They are good?" Meredith asked hopeful, getting the conformation would make her feel better.

"Yes, you have two very healthy baby girls inside you. But again I can't stress enough how much you need to cut back on the work load. It's not healthy for you or the babies," she again said.

"I swear I will not work as much, these babies are my number one priority," Meredith agreed. Addison smiled and left the room, wishing her luck on the exam.

"I'm glad they are healthy," Derek said as he helped her off the table.

"Me too," she said as they started to leave.

"I'm sorry for what I said earlier, your opinion does matter and I agree, the hormones get to me and I get angry easy," Meredith admitted as they walked to the elevator together.

"I forgive you, I know it can be hard but I only want what is best for you and them," he said as he placed his hand on her stomach.

"I know," she sighed, leaning into him.

"I will see you after the exam," he said as the elevator doors opened, he kissed her before he left the elevator. She was nervous, the babies were going crazy in her stomach to match her nerves. She slowly made her way to the room that was put off for the interns to take the exam.

"How'd it go?" Cristina asked as Meredith sat down next to her.

"Good, they are fine. Just one of them is a little smaller," Meredith shrugged.

"Good," Cristina said genuinely. Meredith smiled, her person was turning mushy toward the babies.

"Where's Izzie and George?" Meredith asked as she looked around. Cristina shrugged, she didn't even realize they weren't there. Before Meredith could say something, a very out-of-breath Izzie joined the two of them in the chairs.

"Where were you?" Meredith asked. She then saw George come in, his hair was unusually messier than it was, she looked at the both of them suspiciously but decided not to say anything after they both said they were running late.

"So how's the wedding planning going?" Meredith asked casually.

"Sad and too big, he wants a big-churchy wedding," Cristina groaned, throwing her head back.

"This is a sign, you getting married means there is hope for girls like us," Meredith joked and they both laughed. The examiner entered the room and everyone got silent. The exam took them two hours and they were dismissed after, their results would be in the next day.

"Oh I rocked that test," Cristina laughed.

"I thought it would be harder," Meredith said honestly.

"I wonder what's going on with Bambi and Barbie," Cristina said, pointing to Izzie and George who were having a very intimate conversation.

"Who knows, so big wedding?" Meredith asked.

"Burke wants a huge wedding and I don't know why, he wants all of our friend and families and basically everyone on the face of this freaking earth there," she motioned her finger toward her mouth and fake gagged.

"It won't be that bad," Meredith said suggestively.

"Oh and he wants us to write our own vowels," Cristina rolled her eyes.

"That's bad. When me and Derek get married there will be the traditional vows and it will be a small wedding for just our family and friends," Meredith shrugged.

"So you're having babies with McDreamy and now you're imagining a wedding with McDreamy?" Cristina asked with a raised brow. Meredith thought for a second before she answered.

"Like I said, hope for all of us," Meredith shrugged, her and Cristina parted ways and Meredith headed up to Derek's office. She found him looking at CT scans.

"What's that?" Meredith asked as she looked at the unusual scan.

"That's 6 nails inside of a skull," he pointed out.

"How is he still alive?" Meredith asked, wide-eyed.

"It's a miracle. So how was the exam?" He asked, sitting the scans down on his desk.

"Great, you know Burke is making Cristina have a big wedding? When we get married, we are not having a big wedding," Meredith scoffed, looked at Derek. His eyes got wide when she said that.

"You want to get married?" He asked slowly.

"Not what I said, I mean... Never mind," she shook her head.

"Wait no, we can talk about it if you want. One day I do want to marry you," he confessed.

"Oh. Well ok. Not anytime soon, right?" She asked.

"Oh no, not at all. Too soon remember? Anyway our wedding kind of has to be big, I have four sisters and lots of nieces and nephews," he reminded her.

"Well no church, maybe outdoor?" She asked.

"Sounds perfect," he smiled and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her. She held on to his embrace. Progress, this was progress. She was talking about marrying him one day and he couldn't help but imagine their small outdoor ceremony on his land, their little girls being flower girls, all of his family and her friends along with her father and his family joining them. He knew one day it would happen, one day she will be his wife.


	19. Chapter 19

_Chapter XIX_

 _Die a happy man_

 _Baby last night_

 _Was hands down_

 _One of he best nights_

 _That I've had no doubt_

 _Between the bottle of wine_

 _And the look in your eyes_

 _And the Marvin Gaye_

* * *

"I can't believe you convinced me to go to Hawaii. I can't believe Addison said it was alright to travel, I should be with George," Meredith groaned as they were halfway to the airport. They got the results back from the intern exam two days ago, everyone passed except George. He acted like it was alright but it wasn't. He had to repeat his intern year. He was devastated and he refused to accept that he wasn't upset when in fact he was.

"Meredith he will be fine, he has Callie. We need you to be relaxed now, we want those babies to stay in there for as long as possible," he put his hand on her knee for reassurance. She gave him a smile in return and placed her hand on the 27 week bump. She felt on of the girls kick her hand slightly and she couldn't help but laugh.

"I think one of the girls is protesting," Meredith smiled widely, she was happy that she was finally able to enjoy the easy phase of her pregnancy, after all the scares they had the past few weeks, she needed it. She hated to admit but she started to put her career in front of her girls health and she was terrified.

"She's just like her mother, at least the other one is going to be like her daddy," he smiled as he placed his hand just above Meredith's and felt a tiny body part press against his hand.

"Ok, both hands on the wheel daddy," Meredith instructed and he agreed. He placed his hand on the steering wheel.

"Did you just call me daddy?"

"I did, do you like it?" She smirked and he smiled widely.

"I think I'm turned on right now," he said jokingly and she hit his arm playfully.

"Stop! Can we talk about names? I think I have a list somewhere," she grabbed her purse and searched through to pull out a piece of paper with lines of names.

"Alright shoot," he shrugged, thinking about what all he knew had to be the perfect name for his child.

"I think baby B should be Everleigh because one of my patients was named Everleigh and she was very sweet and I fell in love with the name. It's just so adorable and it flows with Shepherd," she confessed, placing her free hand where the baby is.

"I really like that name, so baby B is Everleigh. Middle name?" He questioned.

"Taylor," she replied with a smile.

"Everleigh Taylor Shepherd. It's perfect Mer," he smiled, "so baby A. Maybe we should name her something that starts with an A since she's baby A," he shrugged, causing Meredith to laugh.

"Really Der?" She giggled, feeling her stomach hiccup.

"One of them has hiccups again," she groaned, rubbing her stomach.

"Anyway, Mer I'm serious. What about Amber?" He asked and she shook her head.

"Ansley?" He raised his brow and she shot him down again.

"What about Alison?" He asked and she was silent for a minute.

"Alison," she repeated, letting the name roll off her tongue.

"Alison Rachael," he said.

"Alison Rachael Shepherd. I think I like it," she smiled and he laughed.

"Good. So Evie and Ali," he reached over and patted her stomach.

"Evie is such a cute nickname!" Meredith grinned. They parked in the parking deck and he carried their luggage through check-in and security. They got to the gate just in time for the plane to start boarding and soon they were landing in Hawaii and making their way to the hotel.

"It's so gorgeous," Meredith exclaimed as she starred out the window. The ocean was a vibrant blue and the exotic trees and plants just lined the island. It was truly one of the most beautiful thing's she has ever seen.

"Yeah, it is," he smiled as he starred at her. When they arrived at the hotel, they were greater by some natives who placed lei's around each of their necks.

"Congratulations," one of the females said to Meredith.

"Thank you," Meredith smiled as she took Derek's hand as they went inside the hotel and up to their room. It had a beautiful view of the ocean and it was practically right on the beach.

"What do you want to do first?" Derek asked as sat all the bags down around the hotel room.

"I don't know, maybe go down to the water?" she suggested as she starred out at the open ocean.

"Ok," He agreed, Meredith put on a pair of shorts and a loose tank top. Derek went into the bathroom and started to fix his hair. Meredith followed him, she started giggling and watching as he fixed his hair.

"I'm going ahead while you pamper yourself," she laughed as she went out to the balcony, she took a deep breath and took in the ocean air. She was mesmerized by the waves crashing on the shore.

Derek finished his hair fairly quickly, he looked out the windows of the balcony to see Meredith leaning against the railing, looking out toward the water. He smiled, the sun was shinning around her, giving her a glow effect as her hair was blowing in the wind. He smiled, walking out and slowly approaching her.

"It's so beautiful," she said as he stood behind her, wrapping his hands around her waist and locking his hands on her growing up.

"Mhm," he nodded, kissing the side of her head as she leaned back into his embrace. They stood like that for a minute, listening to the sounds of the waves and the beautiful sky. It was like a picture-perfect moment.

"Let's go," she pulled away from him, grabbing his hand as she led him down to the beach. Their feet sunk into the white sand as they walked across it until they reached the water. It was slightly warm as it rushed over their feet and ankles as they walked.

"They like the ocean," she smiled as she rubbed over her calm belly. She felt them move slightly but it wasn't the rapid kicks that she was use to, they were sleeping apparently.

"When they get older, we will have to bring them back," he smiled, leaned over to kiss her. It was a soft kiss, not one that was quick like the ones they had gotten use to. It was sensual, gentle but wanting. They had gotten so use to the rush of life, they hadn't been able to enjoy the little things about each other and it made Derek upset slightly.

"I am glad we get this time together before the hectic life starts back," she said honestly after their kiss broke.

"Me too. Soon we will have two little monsters to run our lives along with your crazy schedule," he joked. She laughed and hit his torso playfully.

"You're horrible, horrible I say," she giggled, she dropped his hand and started back toward their room.

"Where are you going?" He asked, chasing after her.

"I'm hungry," she shrugged. They got into the hotel room, Meredith turned on the stereo that the hotel room came with and turned it up a little.

"Where do you want to eat?" Derek asked as he sat and on the edge of the bed.

"I don't know," she stated as she flipped through the stations. She stopped when she heard the best start of one of her favorite songs, We Got The Beat by The Go-Go's.

"I love this song," Meredith giggled as she started to dance a little to the beat. Derek laughed and shook his head.

"This was literally the song I listened to in high school, I remember partying to this song," Meredith laughed as she continued to move to the music.

"I was in med school," he shook his head slightly at her. She grabbed his hands, trying to pull him up.

"Dance with me," she whined.

"I don't dance for anyone," he shook his head.

"Please?" She pouted. He shook his head as he started to stand up. She danced crazy and he just moved his body, trying to match her dance moves. She was singing along with the song until it ended, she was laughing at his attempt to dance.

"That was hilarious," she laughed as the radio host was talking in the background.

"See! I don't dance," he laughed awkwardly at her laughing. She looked relaxed for the first time in a long time, like she had no care in the world.

"It's ok, you'll get better," she said jokingly. He smiled and shook his head at her. There wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her and their kids.


	20. Chapter 20

_Chapter XX_

 _Dancing away with my heart_

 _I finally asked you to dance_  
 _On the last slow song_  
 _And beneath that moon_  
 _That was a disco ball_  
 _I can still feel my_  
 _Head on your shoulder_  
 _And hoping that song_  
 _Would never be over_

* * *

Meredith looked at herself in the mirror, the chocolate dress was a tight fit across her huge bump. She groaned as she tried her best to slip the sandals on her feet, she couldn't bend over weeks ago but she learned to put her shoes on but now she couldn't even bring her leg up enough in order to help them slide on.

"Cristina, would you please help," Meredith groaned. Cristina was currently having her hair curled and put up by Izzie.

"No, I don't touch feet. Get Callie, she likes feet," she smirked at Callie who was trying to put her own dress own.

"I do not do feet," Callie shook her head.

"None of you are of any help," Meredith glared.

"Put your foot up here," Izzie instructed as she put the curling iron down.

"If I could reach my foot that high, I'd put them on myself," Meredith rolled her eyes. Izzie shook her head as she bent down and buckled the sandals around each of her swollen ankles.

"Thank you," Meredith huffed, "now I'm going to go check on the boys."

Meredith slipped out of the dressing room of the church and hunted down all the groomsmen along with the groom. She found them in a room all the way across the church and she was taken aback by the way Derek looked in the suit. His hair was styled differently and he was living up to the McDreamy nickname.

"There's my beautiful girlfriend," he smiled as he came over and kissed her cheek.

"You're only saying that because I'm having your babies," she rolled her eyes, "how's everything in here going?"

"Good, ready when you all are," Preston said with a huge smile across his face.

"Are you two playing nice?" She pointed at Mark and Derek.

"Yes, we can be civil," Derek nodded.

"We could even be friends, want to get a drink later?" Mark asked charmingly.

"Not a chance Mark, not there yet," Derek shook his head.

"Yet, there was a yet. C'mon I miss my best friend," Mark said sadly.

"You slept with my wife," he glared.

"Alright, let's not bring up the past. Derek," Meredith said as she raised her brow at him. He sighed, pulling her against his side and kissing the side of her head.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear.

"To Mark?" She replied bluntly. He rolled his eyes and started to argue but he stopped when he saw the look in her eyes. He turned to Mark, apologizing to him about his behavior.

"I'm going back to the ladies, I'll send word when we are ready," she replied and swiftly went back to the girls. Izzie had finished her hair and make-up, replacing the eyebrows that Burke's mother had shaven off. The only thing she had left was to put on the dress which Meredith helped her into.

"You look stunning Cristina," Callie commented with a smile.

"Thanks, I feel weird," she replied with a shrug.

"After today, you won't ever have to do this again," Meredith smiled.

"True. Let's get this over with, I'm ready to be drunk," Cristina grumbled. Callie left to go tell the boys to line up in the back of the church. Cristina and Meredith walked together to meet with the groomsmen, Burke was standing at the front of the church. Cristina's step father was the one who was walking her down the isle so she stood next to him away from the view of the church doors.

"Ready when you are," Cristina said and the music started to play. The first people to walk out was Izzie with Mark. Next was Callie and George.

"You can do this Cristina, I believe in you," Meredith smiled as she hugged her person before grabbing on to Derek's arm as he escorted her down the isle. The church doors closed and the new music began and everyone in the church stood to watch Cristina come down the isle. Everyone except Derek had their eyes on Cristina, Derek's eyes were focused on Meredith who looked beautiful with her hair curled and left down. The brown dress complimented her eyes and he was just boggled by how well she looked for being thirty weeks pregnant.

Cristina made it down the isle and the ceremony began, it was over fairly quickly since they had wrote their own vows. Cristina said words no one knew she was capable of saying and had almost everyone in tears. Burke's vows to Cristina were just as heart warming and they were pronounced husband and wife. Meredith was happy for her best friend, she admired the way she could be so loving but hardcore. She wanted to be like that, she knew she had it in her, she just had to find it.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asked as they had made it outside the church. Everyone was meeting at one of the restaurant's in town for the reception.

"I'm good, we can go to the reception," Meredith smiled. She wasn't sure if her body could handle the standing and walking but she was feeling fine except her ankles were swollen which she had gotten use to.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Yes Derek. They are fine and I am fine," she said with annoyance.

"Alright I just wanted to make sure," he said defensively.

"I'm sorry. But please believe me when I say I am perfectly fine," she smiled as she got into the car as they headed to the reception. They arrived as everyone else was, Meredith met up with Izzie and Alex who were standing awkwardly next to one another.

"Tomorrow, we are no longer interns and officially residents," Alex said with a smile.

"Except George," he added.

"That's not nice Alex, he can retake the exam in a few months and he will pass for sure," Izzie defended him. Every since the intern exam, Izzie and George barely spoke to one another which was very odd to everyone.

"You two play nice please, this is Cristina's day," Meredith grumbled. She was tired of the fighting going on between Alex and Izzie and George.

"It's true, O'Malley is the one who failed," Alex pointed out before he walked away to avoid any more yelling from Meredith.

"I hate him so much," Izzie rolled her eyes as she grabbed her glass of champagne and gulped it down.

"I'm going to find Derek," Meredith nodded to her and went to find Derek who was talking to a few other people from the hospital.

"Are you feeling alright?" He asked. The people he was talking to left and it was just the two of them.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of all the fighting between Izzie and Alex and George. I don't see why it matters of George failed, he can take the test in six months and be moved up," Meredith ranted.

"Everything is gonna work out," He smiled at her sincerely before pulling her into an awkward hug. Her belly had officially gotten in the way of their embrace. The DJ interrupted them and everyone as they gathered everyone around for Cristina and Preston's first dance. After a minute people started to join them on the dance floor.

"Are you gonna dance with me?" Meredith asked nicely.

"Sure but I'm only swaying slightly," he joked as he took her hand and led her to the dance floor.

"Don't step on my feet," she said seriously.

"I'll try not to," he winked and she just giggled as she put her arms around him and swayed to the music. She laid her head against his shoulder, he wrapped his arms tighter around her and turned slightly to kiss the side of her head. She had never been happier in her life than she was in that moment when everything just seemed right.


	21. Chapter 21

**An; I know that usually the song reflects the chapter and how it goes but I couldn't find a song that fits this chapter so I just chose a song that I am currently loving. Also, I'm not seeing a lot of feedback, I feel like this story is just not coming along very much so I am thinking about a time jump after the babies are born, what do you think? Much love ❤️**

 _Chapter XXI_  
 _Sun_

 _With golden string_  
 _Our universe was clothed in light_  
 _Pulling at the seams_  
 _Our once barren world now brims with life_  
 _That we may fall in love_  
 _Every time we open up our eyes_  
 _I guess space and time_  
 _Takes violent things_  
 _Angry things_  
 _And makes them kind_

* * *

Derek laid with his eyes closed, trying to get some sleep of the little bit of time he had left before work. Tonight was the first night where Meredith was not able to sleep because of her growing belly. She was constantly groaning and changing positions which caused Derek to also be awoke with every noise and move she made. She finally just sat up and turned the lamp on and began reading.

"I hate this, I'm so ready for them to just be here," she whined.

"They have to cook a little longer," he mumbled and turned to his side.

"I know. I want them to but I also want to sleep," she said with a little bit of anger to her voice.

"Me too," he said quietly and she glared at him.

"If you have a problem, there is plenty of other places you can sleep."

"I'll remember that," he mumbled as he closed his eyes again. She groaned as she grabbed her stomach, they were both so active and strong, their kicks actually caused her slight pain.

"Good, I'm going downstairs," she huffed as she managed to get out of bed and stomped down the stairs. It was only 5am and she wasn't sure what to do for the next hour. She started coffee for Derek and Izzie, pouring herself orange juice. She craved coffee so badly but she was advised to stay away from caffeine. She silently cursed Addison while sipping on the orange juice. As she moved around, the movements settled in her stomach and she wanted to scream. Anytime she sat down, the babies around go crazy and cause Meredith to almost cut them out herself. When she would stand and move around, they settled other than the flips they did while they slept.

She searched the kitchen for food, finding herself craving something sweet. She found some baked good that Izzie made from her mini freak-out. She went back up the stairs to the empty room which housed all the things they had bought for the nursery that had to be set up. They had bought two dark brown cribs and a rocking chair the same colored wood with a purple seat cushion. They had been given a few packs of diapers from some of the people at work and they had gotten about a dozen onesies all from Susan who insist on buying something for them every time she shops. Meredith soon realized how unprepared she actually was to have these babies. They hadn't even set up where they were going to sleep when they come home much less had any outfits other than the ones that Susan bought impulsively. She immedietly went and grabbed her laptop and went down to the couch. She remembered hearing some nurses talk about how they started online shopping because it was much easier so that is what she was going to do. She first went on and searched things she would need for a baby. She found a website that was actually blog post and immedietly started going to websites to buy the things she saw were interesting.

She first bought a changing table that looked like it would be the same color as the things she had already bought, then she found two rock 'n play's that were the same style but one was lilac while the other was a pale blue. She also found somewhere that she bought at least ten outfits that were for a newborn and even a few preemie clothes that Evie would probably need when she was born. She looked at all the types of strollers and was amazed by all the selections. She decided on a double stroller that could transform from infant to toddler stage. She went through and ordered a lot of bottles along with a breast pump along with a few packs of different brands of pacifier's. As she clicked the check-out button she saw the loads of items that she had clicked on and she finished her order. She knew Derek was going to kill her but this was something that needed to be done.

"You're up early," Izzie yawned as she came down the stairs.

"I couldn't sleep. Did you know that in less than two months I'm going to give birth and I had nothing prepared," Meredith said as she sat the laptop down and followed Izzie into the kitchen.

"Had? What did you do?" Izzie asked as she poured herself a cup of coffee that Meredith had brewed.

"I ordered everything I'll need," she shrugged as she refilled her orange juice glass.

"Meredith! I was going to have you a baby shower at the hospital and invite everyone," Izzie groaned.

"No, I did not want a baby shower. I don't need gifts from anyone," Meredith huffed.

"Well, I mine as well give you the gift I already bought you," Izzie sighed, disappearing and then reappearing with two baskets. They were each filled with a pack of newborn diapers, a set of bottles, each a customized, fluffy blanket with their initials embroidered on it, and matching outfits with hats to match.

"Oh Izzie, you didn't have to," Meredith said as she started to tear up, her emotions were really getting to her recently.

"Mer, your one of my good friends and you literally gave me a place to stay when I had no where to go, it is really the least I can do," Izzie said as she sat the baskets down on the kitchen table. She went over and gave Meredith a hug and Meredith dried her eyes of the tears.

"I'm going to go get dressed, I have to be scary for the interns," Meredith smiled as she went upstairs and slowly crept into her room, Derek laid still on the bed and his breathing was even. He was asleep. She shook her head slightly, grabbing something comfortable to put on and got dressed. She hated that she had to wake him up, he was going to be cranky all day which was not a good thing with the new interns arriving.

"Derek," she said softly as she shook him. He let out a loud groan before he looked over at the clock.

"I hate working," he grumbled as he got up and searched for a pair of pajama pants.

"You're only saying that because you haven't slept much, I'm sorry I kept you up," she apologized as she handed him a spare pair of pajama pants she found on her side of the bed.

"I get it, you can't sleep either but we have to figure something out, I might actually kill someone," he grumbled again as he went to the bathroom that was attached to the room and began brushing his teeth. He then went and got into a nice button up shirt and jeans.

"I fixed coffee too, a whole pot."

"I knew there was a reason I keep you around," He joked as he kissed the side of her head before going downstairs.

"Or maybe it's because I am carrying your children?" she followed him and got out his muesli for him and sat it on the table.

"Who is this from?" he pointed to the baskets.

"Izzie, look at the blankets," she beamed as she picked up the blankets and showed him the embroidered initials.

"Very cute, now we won't mix them up," He joked and she hit his arm.

"I will be able to tell the difference," she glared at him.

"You keep telling yourself that, Mer they are identical," he shook his head at her as he ate his muesli.

"We need to get going soon, I want a head start on the interns," Meredith said as she finished off her orange juice and sat the glass in the sink.

"Mer, just go without me. I'll meet you there," he smiled slightly at her.

"Promise?" She asked sweetly.

"Of course, I work there too," he smirked and she hit his arm before going over and kissing his cheek and backed away with a scrunched face.

"Shave, too much scruff," she said as she ran her hand across the rough hairs on his face.

"I can't shave when I'm still half asleep," he said after her as she was leaving the room. She chose to ignore him as she went outside and got into her Jeep and drove to the hospital. She met up with Cristina who was in the resident's lounge. They could officially be in there and she couldn't be any happier, though she felt for Cristina. Her and Burke weren't granted time for a honeymoon due to the timing but they plan on taking it on the week of thanksgiving.

"Morning Cristina," Meredith said as she went to the locker she was assigned, a white coat with her name embroidered on it waiting inside. She smiled as she ran her fingers across _Dr. Meredith Grey._

"Morning Mer, you're here early," Cristina said as she was finishing putting her scrubs on.

"I could say the same for you, but I couldn't sleep good last night," she shrugged as she pulled off the large shirt and put on scrubs that were large enough to fit over the baby bump.

"Probably because you have a watermelon as a stomach," Cristina joked.

"Shut up, I'm only going to get bigger," Meredith realized and hated herself for saying that. She imagined the pain she would be feeling all the time until after the babies are born and wanted to cry.

"Are you still going by Yang?" Meredith asked questionably.

"Of course, I don't want my interns to think they get special treatment because their resident is married to head of cardio."

"Makes sense. Have you found out who you got?"

"Nope, they will get numbers. I don't have time to remember their names," Cristina scoffed.

"Cristina! That's awful," Meredith shook her head. Cristina just shrugged as they sat there and enjoyed the lounge before all the other residents began piling in groups. Meredith. Cristina, and Izzie all went to the nurses station by the intern locker room and waited for their interns to come out. Izzie was the first to get her interns and she started off trying to impress them and show them around the hospital. Cristina got her interns second and one name stood out when Meredith heard it being called and when she saw the brunette come walking out of the locker room she froze.

"Mer!" Lexie said as she hurried up to Meredith.

"Lexie, I didn't know you were doing your internship here," Meredith said surprised. She didn't really get to know Lexie much since she use to live on campus at her school but they talked occasionally on the phone.

"Yeah, well I wanted to surprise you. No way I'd miss being around my family anymore," Lexie shrugged. She went and stood with the other interns that were assigned to Cristina. She immediately gave them their numbers and they were off.

Meredith was surprised to see her interns come up to her, the first one she noticed was George. She decided not to call them out by their names and instead she gave them their pagers and explain the same rules she was once read by Bailey. She gave the interns all their assignments, George refused to speak to her until all the other interns left.

"Has Izzie said anything to you?" He asked in a low voice.

"No, what would she say?" Meredith asked questionably.

"Nothing, how are you feeling?" He changed the subject, he was avoiding something and Meredith wanted to know what it was.

"Tired, I officially can't sleep anymore," Meredith complained.

"Oh, sorry. Well I guess I better go do intern stuff," he shrugged and Meredith felt her heart break for him. He was so upset but he refused to talk to any of them.

"How's it so far?" Derek asked as he came up behind Meredith, startling her a little.

"Good, George is my intern. I feel so bad," she said.

"I'm sorry. I know it's hard. In six months he can retake the intern exam and be moved up so he won't be waiting for too long," Derek said in a hopeful voice.

"That's good. Have you talked to Mark?" Meredith asked and he shook his head slightly.

"Der, we talked about this. You two were best friends, everything is good now," Meredith tried to explain.

"Fine, alright everything will be fine. I'll talk to him when I have a minute," he sighed.

"Good, now I'm going to monitor my interns," Meredith smiled as she gave him a quick kiss on the lips before walking away. Today was going to be a good day for her.

* * *

 **AN: Another short note, this is my own story so I am playing this out how I want to. I want to bring Mark and Derek back as best friends and I also want develop the relationship between Lexie and Meredith better and sooner than it happened in Grey's. Thanks for reading!**


	22. Chapter 22

_Chapter XXII_  
 _Why Can't We Be Friends_

 _I seen you round for a long_  
 _long time_  
 _I really 'memered you_  
 _When you drank my wine_  
 _Why can't we be friends_  
 _I seen you walk in' down in Chinatown_  
 _I called you but you could not look around_

* * *

Derek rolled over and laid his arm across Meredith's waist, putting the pads of his fingers on her bare stomach. He felt the babies move around in her stomach and he couldn't help but smile. Addison had given Meredith some tips on better way to sleep and how to get comfortable as her stomach keeps growing larger in larger. With Meredith able to sleep, Derek was also able to get more sleep but something in him woke him up early and he just wanted to enjoy it on his day off. Meredith had to go to work at nine in the morning which sucked for him but knew she wouldn't call out. He listened to her breathing start to speed up and she let out yawn before moving his hand away from her.

"I have to pee," she groaned as she managed to get out of the bed and waddled her way to the bathroom. He chuckled when he saw her coming back, she wasn't wearing anything except a sports bra and his boxer's that she stole.

"What's so funny?" she said, grumpy was an understatement.

"You're just so beautiful," he smiled and she shook her head at him.

"I am getting dressed, I know I won't be able to go back to sleep," she said before looking around the room for clothes.

"I'll do the laundry today," he said as he pointed to the small pile of clean clothes.

"Good, and I need you to call Mark and become friends again please," she begged. She was honestly tired of him being all over her, she hoped that if they became friends again, he would spend some time with him instead of constantly being on her all the time.

"Mer," he sighed. He and Mark were becoming friends slowly, he had no idea when or if they would ever be back to where they were before Addison.

"Derek. I'm serious," she grumbled and he purses his lips. He couldn't say no.

"Fine," he stood up and kissed the side of her head before going into the bathroom. Meredith left and he grabbed his phone. He kept putting off calling Mark for a while, starting on the piles of laundry and making himself breakfast. Lunch time rolled around and he had yet to called Mark, he looked at his phone and saw a picture of him and Meredith. He groaned before he grabbed the phone and called Mark.

"Mark Sloan," Mark said as he answered the phone.

"Hey Mark," Derek replied.

"I'm surprised to get a phone call, what's going on man?" Mark said happily.

"Nothing, I was about to get ready and bring Meredith some lunch so I was wondering if you wanted to get some too," Derek said, trying not to sound too needy.

"Of course, I'll just clear my lunch plans up and I'I'll be all yours," Mark said happily. Derek told him where to meet him and they hung up. Derek got dressed in something besides the pajama pants he currently was residing in. He grabbed his wallet and car keys and headed to the deli near the hospital. He picked up something he knew Meredith would eat and ordered Mark the sandwich he use to order a few years ago, hoping he still liked it. He picked himself up a chef salad and a green tea before heading to the hospital. He found Meredith talking with Cristina about something and he came up behind her, kissing the back of her head. Cristina said something and walked off and Meredith turned to face him.

"Derek, you were suppose to be eating with Mark," she frowned as she saw the bag of food in his hands.

"I am, but I need you there so it's not weird," he explained.

"You guys were best friends, it can't be that bad," Meredith rolled her eyes.

"He slept with me wife," Derek grumbled, Meredith had a slightly unamused look on her face, waiting for him to correct himself.

"Ex-wife," he said, now scared he had upset her.

"It was over a year ago, its all done and now you can forgive him," she stated.

"How about me and Mark join you and whoever," Derek suggested.

"I told Lexie I would eat with her today," Meredith informed him.

"That's good, that you two are forming a relationship," Derek smiled, he was happy Meredith wasn't pushing her away like he assumed she would.

"I have to try. Susan and Thatcher have been so good to me lately and I thought since I am forgive people and giving chances, one should be for her too," Meredith shrugged.

"So Lunch is on?" He smiled hopeful.

"Fine. But there will be rules," she glared. Meredith kissed him quickly before she was off to find Lexie. Derek told one of the nurses to page Mark and soon he showed up.

"Hey man," Mark smiled cheekily as he came up to Derek.

"I got you what you always ate in New York, a Turkey club with extra mayo and lots of olives and oil," Derek said as he handed him the sandwich.

"And you stuck with the usual Chef Salad, things really don't change much," Mark joked.

"Yeah, I told Meredith I'm going to eat with her so you can join us if you want," Derek said. Mark accepted his offer and they both went down to the cafeteria. The awkwardness faded as Mark continued to make jokes to him and Derek pointed out the flaws in his jokes but laughed anyway. They went to the table where Meredith was sitting across from Lexie.

"Here's your Italian sub, the meat cooked of course," Derek said handing Meredith her sandwich, "and sorry Lexie. I didn't know you would be joining us or I would have gotten you something."

"It's fine, I don't really mind it," she smiled awkwardly, avoiding eye contact with Mark. The lunch was just small talk, mostly about their days and assignments. Mark talked about a burn victim, he had to reconstruct his whole face and the kid was only 17. Their lunch was interrupted by the three of them being paged to the ER, the four disbursed and Derek left with hope for his friendship with Mark. He knew that soon, maybe they could actually become brother's again.

* * *

 **Author's Note: This chapter is short and sweet, trying to build the relationship between Mark and Derek along with Meredith and Lexie. Hope you enjoyed!**


	23. Chapter 23

_Chapter XXIII_  
 _Keep Breathing_

 _The storm is coming_  
 _But I don't mind_  
 _People are dying_  
 _I close my blinds_  
 _All that I know is_  
 _I'm breathing now_

* * *

Meredith waddled down the halls of the hospital, her stomach having Braxton hicks contractions which caused her slight pain. Both babies wanted to move like crazy when her stomach tensed and she didn't even want to be touched. She was thankful they were so uneven and only happened every ten or fifteen minutes. She saw Izzie and George talking quietly as she walked to them, George angrily stumbled off and Izzie stood dumbfounded.

"What's wrong Iz?" Meredith asked, noticing how she was upset. The more she watched Izzie and George, the more she thought something was definitely up between the two of them.

"Nothing," she shook her head and walked away. Meredith wanted to know, Izzie told her earlier that morning that she was looking for another place since Meredith was about to have the babies. She couldn't tell her no because it would be nice to be just her and Derek and their babies but she also felt bad. She continued to walk around until she found Cristina looking at charts.

"Do you know what's going on with Izzie and George?" Meredith asked.

"Nope, but my guess is that Barbie and Bambi did the nasty because Callie always gives Izzie the evil eye and it's so weird around them," Cristina shrugged.

"There is no way, they couldn't have," Meredith said shocked, thinking for a minute. It could be an explanation why things have been so odd. She just shook it off.

"How's married life?" Meredith asked.

"Eh, it's alright. Burke wants kids," Cristina said as she put the chart down and the two of them started walking down the hall.

"Well, kids aren't so bad," Meredith said.

"For you maybe, but for me they are. I don't do kids," Cristina grumbled.

"What about the girls?" Meredith asked.

"I'll love them of course, but I won't have to wake up every other hour for them to latch to my breast and suck me dry and I won't have to change dirty diapers. I'm alright being the cool aunt but I would be a shitty mom," Cristina said.

"Well I hate to agree with you but it's true. You're career driven, so was my mom. She was shitty as a mother but she was a damn good surgeon," Meredith agreed. She had to stop with another Braxton hicks hit, this one actually hurt her.

"Are you having contractions?" Cristina asked concerned.

"No, Braxton hicks. I'll be fine," Meredith shrugged.

"Are you sure?" Cristina asked. Meredith nodded as they both were paged to the ER, and hurried down.

"There was a four car pile-up," Bailey said as she was telling them more information about the crash. The ambulances were five minutes out and they all rushed to get suited up. Derek came down along with Burke and Mark, they each took a resident. Cristina with Burke while Meredith went with Derek. Each resident assigned their interns on what to do as they all went straight to the ambulance bay. They were unloading each crash victim, two DOA's and nothing else majorly wrong with the rest of the patients. One head lac and one with a possible punctured lung. The rest just cuts and bruises. Mark left and said he had better things to do and the chaos was dying down.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asked Meredith as they stood outside the CT room.

"I'm good, they are killing my bladder," Meredith didn't want to worry him that the Braxton hicks were possibly real contractions so she kept to herself. Their patient didn't have any brain bleed and they let a 5th year resident stitch up the head lac.

Derek followed Meredith to the nurses station, they were both filling out the charts and Meredith let out a slight groan as she held her stomach. Derek looked concerned as he stopped what he was doing.

"Mer, come on and let's go lay down," Derek said as he took her hand and leaded her slowly to an on-call room.

"Derek, I am fine, just a few braxton hicks," she lied, she knew they were most likely true contractions but she had a lot to do and she would figure it out later.

"Meredith, please," he plead, looking at her. She groaned and continued walking with him and they made it to an on call room. Derek was the one to open the door and the sight he saw and his eyes went wide. Meredith looked around and the two people in the bed shocked the both of them.

"Lexie!" Meredith yelped.

"Good going Mark," Derek said sarcastically. They were both frantic to get their clothes on.

"This is..." Meredith started before she let out a loud gasp as she grabbed her stomach. She felt something start to trickle down her leg and she burst into tears. Not only was she starting to have contractions, she had also peed on herself.

"Meredith, I'm sorry," Lexie said, feeling upset.

"I'm not mad or upset at you, i just peed on myself," she continued to cry, "and it's won't stop."

"Meredith, we should go see Addison," Derek said, concerned suddenly by her revelation. They both went to the OB wing and found Addison.

"Hi Meredith, what's the matter?" Addison asked concerned.

"I think I am having contractions," Meredith said, trying to dry the tears.

"It's alright, let's get you a room so we can check on those babies," Addison said as she got one of the nurses to tell her where an empty exam room was and she brought Meredith to the room.

"Can I get a gown? I kind of peed myself," Meredith said quietly to Addison who looked a little confused.

"Meredith, are you sure it was that or was it your water?" Addison asked.

"I don't know, all I know is that now my pants are soaking wet and my stomach is contracting," Meredith now said, a slight fear coming into her voice. She was now fearful, only being thirty-five weeks pregnant. Her babies might not be fully ready.

"Alright, get into the gown and I'll be back in here once I go find your chart," Addison said before leaving.

"Meredith, it's going to be alright," Derek said as he was trying not to freak out himself. He had to be strong with Meredith freaking out.

"No, what if it's not?" she asked as she was putting the gown on.

"It will be, they take after their stubborn mother," he joked as he helped tie her gown in her back.

"You're an asshole," she laughed before stopping and trying to breathe as another contraction had hit. They were not coming stronger and faster. She was convinced she was now in labor. Addison came inside again, this time she had the portable ultrasound machine.

"I just want to check in on the babies, make sure they can handle in case you are in labor," Addison said as she came closer to Meredith. She started with the physical exam, checking to see if she was dilated and if her water had actually broke.

"Well, good news. You did not pee yourself, Meredith you are in labor officially," Addison said as she then took the transducer and put gel on it before putting it on Meredith's stomach. Addison found the babies almost right away, a look of concern on her face.

"What is it?" Derek said quietly to Addison, trying to not start any worry for Meredith. Addison just shook her head, trying to see if what she was seeing was real.

"Meredith, how do you feel about a c-section?" Addison asked, earning a very worried look from Meredith.

"What? Why?" she said, her tears now starting to fall.

"The placenta is starting to detach so I want to go in and do a c-section," Addison said, Meredith now started to officially freak out.

"Do whatever you have to but are they big and healthy enough?" Meredith said, her voice quivering.

"They look good in the ultrasound but you know how things change once they arrive," Addison said honestly.

"Alright,let's do the c-section," Meredith nodded. Addison agreed and went to find an anesthesiologist to give Meredith an epidural.

"When we get into that ER and something happens, make sure Addison saves the babies first," Meredith said.

"Mer, don't talk like that. Everything will be fine," he said, trying to be positive. He refused to even think about what Meredith was talking about. Everything had to be alright, they had to be. He couldn't lose Meredith, she was certainly the most important person in his life. No matter what happened, she had to come first.


	24. Chapter 24

**Author's Note: Its finally here, the update that is the most anticipated. The birth of the twins. I really enjoyed writing this chapter, I actually had this finished for over a month, I just had to write the chapters prior to this one. I am really happy with how this came out and played, let me know what you guys think of it! Thanks for reading.**

* * *

 _Chapter XXIV  
Lullaby_

 _Oh these little hands  
They don't know what hurt is  
And these little eyes  
_ _They see the world  
_ _In different colors  
_ _And all I can think about is  
_ _How I could live without you  
_ _And time is but a loom  
_ _In this hospital room  
_ _Where I see you for the very first time_

* * *

"Meredith you are going to be fine," Derek said, holding her hand as they rushed with the gurney. Meredith wasn't getting any calmer as they moved toward the OR.

"No it's not! I'm only 35 weeks. They aren't going to be ok," Meredith sobbed. Derek's heart broke. There wasn't anything either of them could do to prevent it. It was just something that happened and it was all moving too quickly.

"Meredith they will be fine. Tiny maybe but they will survive. They are fighters, just like you. I'll be by your side the whole time," he promised. He could never leave her side in something like this.

"No Derek. You have to stay with the babies, they are going to need you," she begged. Derek just nodded as they entered the doors. He went and scrubbed in, the only thing he could think about was if Meredith and his babies were going to live.

He went into the OR, they had Meredith on the table with her arm laid on the the arm rest with an IV pushing liquid into her veins. He ran his hand over her hair, smoothing it before he put it in a hair cap.

"Derek," she said with tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Mer, please don't worry. They will be fine," he assured her, resting his hand in hers and squeezing it for reassurance. Soon Addison was rushing in with one of the 4th year residents as she got set up for the c-section.

"Alright Meredith, you might feel a little bit of pressure," Addison said as she started the incision.

"I hope they have your hair," Meredith smiled at him. She didn't want to think about the pain that was happening to her abdomen.

"I hope they have your smile," he smiled and stroked her hand. Derek peaked over the curtain just in time to see Addison pull out the first baby. She was tiny, Addison clipped off the cord and handed the baby to the resident.

"Baby A is here," Addison said just as the resident moved around the curtain to show Meredith the baby.

"Alison," Meredith said with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face as the baby's face turned a bright red as she started to cry. Derek smiled and leaned down to kiss Meredith's lips before he went over with the resident to the side where they were cleaning the baby up.

"Hi Ali," he said as lightly touched her arm as two of the nurses took over while the resident went back over to Meredith. Derek looked over just in time for Addison to deliver the second baby. She was significantly smaller than her sister, after Addison cut the cord she still wasn't breathing.

"Why isn't she crying?" Meredith looked terrified at me for answers.

"Calm down Meredith, she just isn't wanting to breath for us just yet," Addison said calmly as she handed the baby over the the resident who took the baby beside Derek. Most of the nurses and one other Doctor surrounded the baby. Derek observed quietly for a minute.

"Dr. Montgomery, I think she has MAS," the doctor said as she was trying to clear her airway.

"Clear her airway, if she doesn't start on her own then put her on the vent," Addison said as she was now working on stopping the bleeding that was coming from her uterus. The doctor placed a breathing tube into Evie's mouth and put her in an incubator before rushing her to the NICU.

"Derek you stay with those girls," Meredith cried as she watched them take Alison along with them.

"Mer," he started to say before he walked over to her and leaned down to kiss her forehead, "I'll be back."

Meredith watched as he left and she started crying as Addison was working inside her stomach. She knew it was too soon, she knew she shouldn't have been working so hard. She felt her head starting to get dizzy, she was trying to process her symptoms with her emotions and suddenly she heard the beeping start going off. An anesthesiologist placed a mask on her and she dozed off into darkness.

* * *

Derek watched as the babies were being worked on, Evie was hooked up to multiple machines while Alison was screaming her head off. He felt tears trickle down his face. He didn't know what to do, he couldn't stop thinking about Meredith who he just left there alone.

"Dr. Shepherd, would you like to hold her?" The nurse asked as she held Alison in her arms. He gladly took her, immediately settling the crying baby.

"Alison, you look just like your mother," Derek smiled as he rocked the baby in his arms.

"Your sister is going to be fine, right?" Derek held the tiny girl in his arms as he stood over the incubator which held his other daughter.

"Someone loves her daddy, doesn't she?" He cooed at Alison, bouncing her slowly in his arms. He sat back down in the rocking chair that was put next to the incubator and he rocked slowly with Alison as she slept soundly in his arms. He looked at Evie and felt his heart continue to break as he watched her being such a fighter. She was tiny but her breathing was getting better.

"Derek," Mark said as he poked his head into the room and Derek looked up. He hadn't realized that nearly an hour and a half passed since they were born and he started to worry about Meredith.

"Mark," Derek replied, standing up slowly.

"Meredith is out of surgery. I think she's going to wake up any minute," Mark said and Derek had a decision to make.

" I'm coming," Derek said and Mark left. He took one last look at Evie, knowing she would be alright. He paged one of the nurses and instructed her to stay with Evie, even threatening her nicely to stay before she agreed. He probably wasn't suppose to but he brought Alison anyway, she was cleared with the pediatric doctor so he went assumed it would be alright.

As he stepped into the room, he saw a very pale and fragile woman laying in the bed. She didn't even look much like Meredith, she didn't have the nature glow to her skin. He went and sat in the chair next to her bed, making sure Alison was still asleep as he waited. It was about fifteen minutes before Meredith finally came to and looked over at Derek. It took her a minute to say anything.

"Where's the other one?" She said hoarse, a worried look on her face.

"She's fine Mer, she's just in the NICU. She is fine except she has to be on a ventilator because she had a hard time breathing and they have her on a feeding tube because she's so small," he smiled at her, continuing to rock Alison in his arms.

"I want to see her, I told you they were too small," she cried as she grabbed the cup of water and took a sip. Her throat was too dry to be crying.

"Mer, this is Alison Rachael Grey-Shepherd, she is a healthy 6 pounds even," he held the tiny infant closer to Mer so she was able to see her clearly.

"She's so beautiful," she began to tear up as she reached up and touched her head softly. She had the dark brown hair that matched Derek's and Meredith couldn't stop looking at her. She was officially a mother and she couldn't be any happier than she was.

"Here, hold her," Derek offered, placing the baby carefully in Meredith's arms. She happily took her, instantly pulling her head up to her mouth and placing a kiss on her head. The baby slept peacefully in her mother's arms.

"Hi Ali, I'm your mama," she cried, holding her close. She cooed at the tiny yawn that came from her little mouth.

"Meredith, I know it's hard but you can make it. We are all going to be able to make it, we always do, Everleigh is 4lbs and 5oz so it will be no time before she can come home too," he assured her their other daughter would be fine besides her size. They both stared at the baby, and there was a knock on the door and Addison came in.

"So during your surgery, there were a few complications. Your uterus started bleeding due to the placenta detaching earlier than expected and I had a hard time getting it under control but you are going to have to stay in the hospital a few extra days," Addison said.

"Will I ever have any more kids," Meredith asked as her voice cracked.

"If it heals correctly, yes. But if something happens and I have to go in and fix it again then there will be a chance of having to remove your whole uterus so I suggest that you take it easy. You cannot lift anything and please don't move too fast," she stressed.

"Alright. Thanks again so much Addison," Meredith smiled.

"You're welcome, and congratulations again. I'll go check on the other one and come update you on her progress and treatment plan," Addison said before she left.

"This is all so much," Meredith admitted.

"I know but we can make it through," he assured her as he kissed the side of her head and wiped the tear that fell from her eye. They sat in silence and watched Ali closely, just in awe of her features. There was a knock before the door was cracked open and Lexie came in along with Mark.

"Hey Mer," Lexie said with a slight smile, she held a bundle of balloons along with a small teddy bear.

"Hey Lex, Mark," she smiled at both of them and moved Ali around in her arms to show her to Lexie.

"She's so precious," Lexie smiled widely as she starred at the baby, Mark stood beside her and said the same thing.

"Congrats brother," Mark said as he went over to Derek and patted his back. Meredith noticed how Derek didn't say anything except thanks and she was very happy with the way he reacted. They were actually becoming friends again, meaning the girls were actually going to have a family.

"Mer, I'm sorry that you had to find out about us like that," Lexie said with a sigh.

"It's alright. I'm actually really happy for you both," Meredith said.

"Derek," Meredith said and he just nodded along with her. Addison entered the room again, this time a little surprised on what she was walking in on.

"How is she Addie?" Derek asked hopeful, running his hand over Meredith's shoulder and giving it a slight squeeze.

"She is doing the best that she could be, I don't know if anyone explained but she inhaled meconium as she was being born so that caused her to have the problems she is having now. Once we get everything under control and she is off the ventilator and eating regularly, she can be released," Addison explained.

"What does that mean? How long does she have to stay in there?" Meredith asked, worried but also thankful that it wasn't anything seriously wrong other than the MAS.

"It could be anywhere from a week and up to three weeks," Addison answered.

"Can I go see her?" Meredith asked, trying to sit herself up more in the bed.

"If you are up to it, just please take it easy and I'll go get a nurse to help you into a wheelchair," Addison said as she went and got a nurse. She supervised as Derek and the nurse helped Meredith slowly into the wheelchair.

"Lex, do you want to come?" Meredith asked and Lexie nodded. They all made their way to the NICU where Cristina was actually waiting in the room by Evie's incubator.

"Hey Cris," Meredith smiled, happy to see her person there.

"She's cute Mer, and so is that one," Cristina said, pointing to the baby that was swaddles securely in Derek's arms.

"Thanks," Meredith smiled.

"So you never told us their names," Lexie said as she examined the baby in the incubator.

"Well Derek is holding Alison Rachael," Meredith reached up and ran her fingers across the hat that was on her head before putting her hand on the incubator, "and this is Everleigh Taylor, Evie."

"Those are adorable names," Lexie smiled as she admired her big sister and the babies.

"Thanks," Meredith smiled as she looked back and forth at both of her girls. She couldn't believe that she was actually a mother now, she assumed that when she would have them she would but happy but words can't explain how she is feeling. One thing is for sure and that is Meredith has never felt like this ever in her entire life.


	25. Chapter 25

_Chapter XXV_  
 _So Cold_

 _Oh you can't hear me cry_  
 _see my dreams all die_  
 _from where you're standing_  
 _on your own_  
 _it's so quiet here_  
 _and i feel so cold_  
 _this house no longer_  
 _feels like home_

* * *

"So do you get to go home today?" Susan asked as she and Thatcher were sitting on the couch the room had. Thatcher had Alison in his arms and a large smile on his face. Alison was sleeping soundly as she always was.

"I think so, Addison said I did," Meredith said, wanting to avoid the subject.

"I'm sorry, I totally forgot," Susan started to apologize but Meredith stopped her.

"It's alright. I understand, it will be hard but maybe she won't have to be here much longer," Meredith shrugged, she honestly didn't want to think about it.

"Well when you come up here to visit, I will happily come by and watch this cute little one," Susan said in a higher voice, running her finger over Alison's cheek.

"I'll keep that in mind but you will have to fight Lexie for that," Meredith laughed, remembering Lexie had already reserved babysitting rights for when she is off work. Thatcher was just quiet as he held Ali, occasionally just talk to her. Meredith couldn't help but think about how Thatcher must have been when she was a baby. She wondered if he also looked at her like that.

"Thatcher, can you tell me about when I was born?" Meredith asked, watching his expression of surprise look back at her.

"Uh well um it was a decently warm morning, Ellis was in class while I actually took the day off because I had to run all the errands so I had our car. When it was time for Ellis to get out of class I was stuck in traffic and I saw an ambulance pulling out of the college. I had a bad feeling so I turned around and followed the ambulance and sure enough, it was your mother. She was in full blown labor by the time she got to the hospital. A few hours later she had you," Thatcher said, now realizing Ellis had never told her.

"Were you happy?" Meredith asked, now curious.

"I was, very happy for you but I was upset with Ellis. She was just, it was different. I had seen my sister after she had a baby and now I am seeing you with her and Ellis said she was happy but you could look at her and tell that she was smiling but I don't think it really hit her that she now had responsibility," Thatcher tried to say in nice way that Ellis did love her but she wasn't happy.

"Thank you," Meredith said with a slight smile. Addison came into the room with a slight smile on her.

"How are you feeling today Meredith?" Addison asked.

"Good, ready to get out of here as a patient," Meredith smiled as Addison laughed.

"Well I'm going to get your discharge papers for you and that little one, I'll have a pediatrician come in here and check her out to get the good for her to go home," Addison smiled.

"Wait, Addison can you go get Derek so he can come in here and I want to go see Evie," Meredith said with a slight smile.

"Sure," Addison replied and then left the room.

"If you guys want to come you can," Meredith offered, not wanting to sound rude.

"No, it's fine. We will stay here with Alison and Derek, give you some alone time with your girl," Susan smiled sympathetically.

"Ok," Meredith nodded. Derek came in and kissed Meredith.

"She's growing so well," Derek smiled as he was referring to Everleigh. It was as if Ali sensed him in the room because when she heard his voice, she woke up from her sleep and started to get cranky.

"He's her favorite," Meredith joked, but was actually being serious. It didn't take but him speaking one word for her to wake from a dead sleep and seek him out to be in his arms.

"She's a daddy's girl," he smiled widely as her took her carefully from Thatcher. She started to calm as he was talking to her.

"You were like that Meredith, I understand," Thatcher laughed as he reminisced.

"Alright, now I'm going to slowly make my way down to the NICU," Meredith smiled as she took her time getting out of the hospital bed. She could move easily since it had been four days since the c-section but she chose to be careful. She knew that maybe one day she would want to have another baby so she had to be careful. Addison was checking out Evie when Meredith walked in and began to put the yellow protective gear on.

"How is she?" Meredith asked as she tried to tie the ties by herself.

"Good, she is triggering the vent so we are going to start slowly weaning her off," Addison said with a smile as she went behind Meredith and helped her.

"Thank you, for everything."

"It's my job, I know we have our past and I'll always love Derek but you are his future along with your precious girls," Addison said with a nod.

"I couldn't do what you were doing, helping the girlfriend of the love of your life," Meredith shook her head, trying not to think about it as she walked over to the incubator that held Everleigh. Izzie had sew a small blanket with her name to go on top of the incubator to show the nurses her name.

"I realized he wasn't the love of my life, i haven't found him yet but when I do, I couldn't do this," Addison replied then she left without another word.

Meredith stood quietly, she just starred at the tiny baby inside. She wanted so very badly to hold her and she knew she couldn't yet. It was killing her, she had watched many other babies be like this and she felt bad but nothing felt like she was then. Meredith didn't even notice when Cristina came into the room.

"Are you ready to go?" Cristina spoke, noticing Meredith starting to cry

"Mer," Cristina sighed as she put her arms around her person. Things were different since she found out she was pregnant, they drifted apart a little bit but right now showed that she still loved Meredith which put a ease to Meredith knowing she didn't completely lose her person.

"I don't want to leave her," Meredith mumbled between tears.

"I know you don't but you have to take care of Alison. Evie will be fine, she has all of us here," Cristina assured her.

"Yeah Mer, we will all be here," Lexie piped, she had also came in the room without being noticed.

"What if something happens," Meredith said in a dry heave, trying to catch her breath.

"Mer, I will stay here all night with her, I won't leave her side," Cristina said.

"Cris, you don't have to," Meredith said, knowing Cristina wasn't really a kid person.

"I want to. Besides, she has to get to know her aunt Cristina," Cristina smiled, causing Meredith to smile as she wiped her tears.

"And tomorrow, I'll come sit with her for a bit in between patients," Lexie smiled.

"I love you both," Meredith laughed slightly saying it, it was ironic how a year ago she was just an intern who slept with her boss who was married and didn't have anyone. Now she had two babies by her boss who she was in love with, a person who she could always count on, and even a sister who she was learning to love.


	26. Chapter 26

_Chapter XXVI_  
 _Never Grow Up_

 _Your little hands wrapped around my finger_  
 _And it's so quiet in the world tonight_  
 _Your little eyelids flutter cause your dreaming so i_  
 _Tuck you in,_  
 _Turn on your favorite night light_  
 _To you everything's funny_  
 _You got nothing to regret_  
 _I'd give all I have, honey_  
 _If you could stay like that_

* * *

Meredith sat quietly as she rocked Alison in her arms, she was snuggled tightly against her chest and her hand was wrapped around Meredith's finger. She just watched as the little girl slept quietly in her arms and she fell in love with every breath the little girl took. She let a smile creep on her face as the little girl was smiling also.

"Hey," Derek said from the doorway.

"Hi," Meredith didn't even look up as she kept her eyes glued to the baby.

"You know, today we get to go get Everleigh," Derek reminded her as he walked closer to the two.

"I know, that is why I'm just enjoying this moment because it's going to be hard when there are two," Meredith informed him.

"I know," he smiled as he walked over to her.

"I'm excited," Meredith smiled. Her life was so different, she was so in love with both of the little girls that she had. They were both so tiny but perfect. She stoked the baby's cheek with her finger which caused her to smile.

"Me too," he said as he watched them. It was odd to him, becoming a mother has changed her and he couldn't believe it.

"Susan is going to be here soon then we can go get her," Meredith said as she re-positioned the baby in her arms where she was laying in her hands. Alison yawned and she stretched, Derek and Meredith both smiled as she curled back up and fell asleep.

"She is definitely your child," Derek joked and she glared at him.

"If she wasn't so cute and taking both of my hands, I would totally hit you right now," she returned her stare to the little girl who now had a slight smile to her face. The doorbell rang and the both of them stood up, Meredith holding Alison tightly against her chest as she made her way down the stairs. Derek opened the door and a very delighted Susan came inside.

"Hey Susan," Meredith smiled as she hugged her.

"Hi Meredith, and there's my adorable granddaughter," Susan's eyes lit up as she was talking to the baby. Meredith kissed the side of her head before she handed her over to Susan. Ali only opened her eyes for a second to see who was now holdin her before she fell back into a slumber.

"She just ate so she's probably tired, if she starts to get fussy she has a collection of pacifiers in the changing table and if she wakes up and wants to..." Meredith was suddenly cut off by Susan.

"Meredith, I raised two myself. I know what to do. You two go and bring my other adorable granddaughter home so she can be with her sister," Susan said as she started to shoo them out the door.

"Thanks Susan," Derek says as he kisses the side of Alison's head and grabs Meredith's hand.

"If she gets hungry, there is a bag of milk in the fridge. We'll be back as soon as she can," Meredith said, kissing Alison once more before her and Derek left. Inside, she was freaking out. Never had she ever thought it would feel like this to be leaving without her. She sort of felt lost in a way. She was quiet her whole ride to the hospital and when they arrived, they immedietly shot up to the NICU. They put on the protective gear and went straight to Evie.

"I think she's gotten bigger," Meredith said in awe as they went to the bassinet that held her. They removed the ventilator exactly a week ago and she had gained seven ounces which put her at five pounds even.

"Mer, you saw her yesterday," Derek shook his head.

"How's my sweet girl doing," Meredith said sweetly as she lifted the baby from the bassinet and held her. She was lighter than Alison which wasn't such a big difference since they were both so small.

"Nice to see you Meredith, and you too Derek," Addison said as she was entered the room. She took the baby from Meredith and placed her on the scale. It showed her weight and Addison wrote it down along with all her stats.

"Now it's time for the car seat test," Addison said as she picked up Everleigh and held her while Derek grabbed the car seat, putting it on the chair and Addison strapped the baby into the car seat.

"You got this baby girl," Derek said as he leaned down and kissed her forehead. She scrunched up her face and Meredith giggled.

"She doesn't like the stubble either," Meredith laughed as she wrapped her arms around his arm and leaned against him. Addison hooked the oxygen reader to her foot and set up the machines. They all stood there as Addison set the timer and they watched as she just stayed content in the car seat. The hour and a half passed by slowly but it passed and she passed.

"Well, looks like we have someone who is ready to go home," Addison said as she picked her up and handed the baby back to Meredith. They filled out paperwork and got everything ready. Derek carried the car seat and bags to the car while Meredith wasn't allowed to carry anything due to her c-section. They went home and Derek again carried the things inside, they stopped in front of the door and they heard two female voices inside. Derek smiled when he recognized the other voice besides Susan and he had Meredith open the door quickly. Inside, Derek's mom was there with Ali in her arms as she and Susan were talking.

"Mom," Derek smiled as he sat the car seat down and hugged his mother carefully.

"Hi Son, Meredith. How are you feeling honey?" Carolyn said, hugging Meredith.

"I'm alright, glad to finally have both my girls home," Meredith smiled as she finally took Evie out of the car seat, she was sleeping soundly and didn't even budge when Meredith picked her up.

"They are adorable Meredith, they look like you," Carolyn awed at both the girls.

"Thanks, I kind of think they look more like Derek," Meredith smiled as she fixed Evie in her arms.

"They look like both of you, now let me see that beautiful little one," Susan said with a smile as she took Evie from Meredith.

"So how long are you staying in town ma?" Derek asked as he moved the car seat into the corner next to Alison's.

"Ready to get rid of me already?" Carolyn raised her brow.

"Of course not, I just wanted to know," he shrugged.

"My ticket is for two weeks," she said as she moved Alison into a different position. Her bright blue eyes were wide open as she just looked at Carolyn.

"Alright, and you're staying here, right?" Derek asked almost in a plea.

"Of course, I can't stay a moment away from these two precious girls," Carolyn said as she smiled down at Ali.

"Well we are happy to have you here Carolyn," Meredith smiled as she just watched both Carolyn and Susan with her daughter's.

"I'm going to go pump really quick," Meredith said as she left to go upstairs. Derek went into the kitchen leaving Carolyn and Susan with the babies.

"I can't believe she's so little," Susan said in awe to Carolyn.

"They are both tiny little angles," Carolyn replied with a smile.

"So what are you being called by them when they get old enough?" Susan asked as she sat down carefully with Evie.

"My other grandkids call me nana so I was just going to let them call me nana, you?" Carolyn asked as she sat on the opposite side of Susan.

"I don't know. My other granddaughter Molly isn't even six months yet so I think I'll let her call me whatever she wants and the girls can just learn from her," Susan shrugged.

"Yes, my oldest grandson Damien started nana and it just stuck," Carolyn smiled.

"They look a lot like Meredith did in the pictures Thatch has," Susan spoke as she held Evie in her lap, letting her stretch her little arms.

"They do favor her a lot, they have Derek's lips though, and his eye shape but the rest is Meredith. I can see it," Carolyn said as she held Alison out like Evie as they compared the two. There wasn't any difference between them really except their sizes.

"How were my girls?" Meredith asked with a smile as she came from downstairs.

"They are good, cute as buttons," Carolyn smiled.

"I'm glad you're here Carolyn," Meredith replied.

"I wouldn't miss being here for anything," Carolyn replied.

"Where did Derek go?" she asked, now noticing he wasn't in the room.

"He went into the kitchen, not sure what for," Susan replied.

"Oh alright," Meredith nodded as she sat down on the large chair.

"Well, I am about to have to leave these sweet faces, Molly is coming to visit from Portland with little Laura and she should be here in a few hours," Susan said sadly. She kissed the top of Evie's head before giving her to Meredith. She said goodbye before she left.

"I'm back, sorry. I was trying to handle some stuff since I'm not going back until next month," Derek said returning, smiling.

"It's fine," Carolyn said with a smile.

"How's the sister's?" Derek asked as he came and sat down next to his mother.

"Good, good. They are really excited to meet their new nieces," Carolyn smiled as she repeated it in a baby voice for Alison. Meredith glared at Derek, motioning for him to tell her.

"Ma, I'm not sure when we will have time to make it out there," Derek said, hoping to not upset his mother.

"Well Christmas is in a few months, I expect to see you both there since you missed last Christmas," she rose her eyebrows at them.

"Uh that's the thing, we are both using some of our vacation time to be out with the girls so we might not get off for Christmas," he mumbled. He knew how important Christmas is to his mother and his whole family, it was the only time they all ever got to see each other.

"Well I suggest you figure something out because Christmas is the most important holiday to this family and these two sweeties have to be present to have their new ornaments placed on the tree," Carolyn said sweetly but she meant it. Every time a new Shepherd was born, they got an ornament with their name added to the family Christmas tree.

"We'll try," Derek said, earning a death glare from Meredith. He mouthed I'm sorry to her and she shook her head and looked down at Everleigh. He just sighed and shook his head. Nothing much he could fight with now. He would love to spend Christmas with his family back in New York but he would also love to have the chance of spending Christmas here, again. He was torn, either making his mother happy or Meredith happy.


	27. Chapter 27

_Chapter XXVII_  
 _It won't be like this for long_

 _He didn't have to wake up_  
 _He'd been up all night_  
 _Lying there in bed and listening_  
 _To his newborn baby cry_  
 _He makes a pot of coffee_  
 _He splashes water on his face_  
 _His wife gives him a kiss and says_  
 _It's gonna be okay_  
 _It won't be like this for long_

* * *

"It's your turn," Meredith groaned as she tried to hand a screaming Alison off to Derek. It had been exactly twenty-four hours since Carolyn left. Twenty-four hours of Meredith and Derek alone with the twins.

"I don't know what to do!" He exclaimed as he grabbed her from Meredith.

"I don't either," she groaned. She looked over and saw a sleeping Evie, she didn't even seemed phased by her sister crying. Ali started to settle as Derek started circling the room and bouncing her against his chest.

"Keep it up," Meredith sighed as she slumped onto the bed. Alison had been crying for the past three hours for no reason, they had tried everything to make it stop. She had a clean diaper, she ate and still cried, and she also kept fighting her sleep.

Derek kept doing exactly what he was doing, bouncing Alison in his arms as she soothed her crying. Anytime he tried to stop, she would start to get cranky and cry again. He did it for another thirty minutes, until she was in a deep slumber as he laid her into the bassinet. They both held their breath until they saw she was continuing to sleep.

"I'm going to make coffee," he mumbled as he walked into the kitchen, still exhausted from the rough night. Alison was having a hard time sleeping, she wouldn't sleep unless she was on someone's chest and now they had to be moving. He looked over and saw Izzie coming down the stairs, she looked tired also.

"I have to find a new place," she groaned as she sat on the bar stool.

"Sorry Iz, i didn't know she kept you awake too," Derek replied as he just watched the coffee drop into the pot.

"It's fine, I'll just catch some sleep at the hospital. When do you come back?" She asked, Derek had been on paternity leave since they were born and they were going on five weeks old now.

"Next week, Meredith still has another three weeks. I feel bad for leaving her but Susan will be here when Lexie isn't over here," he shrugged as he poured himself a cup of coffee, drinking it black because he was too tired to add anything.

"Good luck," Izzie nodded before getting a cup of coffee and going back upstairs. Derek downed his coffee and went upstairs again. Meredith was passed out across the bed, curled up on his side of the bed. He just shook his head as he went to look at the girls. He sensed Evie beginning to wake up, she was making faces as she started to stretch out. He quickly grabbed her up so she wouldn't start crying as he held her close to his chest.

"Mer," he whispered, trying to wake her up.

"Hmm?" She groaned as she just wanted to sleep.

"Do you want to breast feed or just want me to give her a bottle?" He asked.

"Bottle, sleeping now," she replied before falling back into a slumber. He quietly made it down to the kitchen again where he started to warm her bottle as she started to cry.

"Here baby girl, give me a second," he said as he bounced her against him and use his free hand to make the bottle. He managed to do it one handed, surprising even himself as he rearranged her in his arms and started to feed her.

"There we go, happy as can be," he smiled sleepily as she sucked away at the bottle.

"I miss your nana, somehow she made it easier and it's only been one day," he sighed as he continued to talk to Evie. She finished and he burped her as he returned her to the laying position in his arms. Her eyes were wide as she looked up at him.

"You're not going to want to sleep, are you?" He asked and she just smiled in return. He shook his head as he went into the living room and laid out the play mat as he put her on her back on it. He laid down next to her and moved the toys that were hanging and she cooed and smiled at the toys as she reached for them.

He just smiled and watched as she played slightly, doing her best to reach for something to put into her mouth, only managing to get her fist every time. She kept on and kept on until she started to get aggravated and fussy.

"Oh, feisty," Derek joked as he picked her and and soothed her. She yawned a little and he immediately started to rock her. He was tired himself and wanted rest. He rocked her back and forth until her eyes closed and he brought her upstairs, laying her down next to Alison. He managed to climb into bed without waking up Meredith and he fell asleep.

Not even an hour passed when there was a cry of hunger coming from one of them. Alison. Derek groaned as he nudged Meredith awake, she blinked a few times before grabbing her and sliding her over to her side.

"Feed her," he said as he continued to shake Meredith.

"She's going to get a milkshake if you keep shaking me like that," Meredith snapped and he stopped shaking her and fell back asleep. Meredith waited for her to finished, hoping she wouldn't start crying again like she had been. Meredith slide her back into the bassinet and watched for any signed of crying, but to her surprise she just laid there and starred up at Meredith.

"You're not going to sleep, are you?" Meredith groaned as she reached over again and picked her up. She sat her in front of herself on the bed and watched as she was figuring out her own anatomy. She was moving her tongue in and out of her mouth as she stretched out her arms and legs.

"I figured you wouldn't," Meredith shook her head and continued to smile at Ali. She cooed a little and kicked her feet at Meredith, and Meredith smiled. She picked up Alison and reclined back against the pillow, letting Alison rest against her chest. She kept trying to lift her head and turn it side to side. The phone started ringing and Meredith looked over at the number and answered it.

"Hello?" She said as she rubbed circles on Alison's back.

"Hey Mer, are you awake?" Lexie asked.

"Of course I am, why?" She asked as she carefully got up out of bed and walked out into the hall and down the stairs.

"I was just making sure it's ok for me to stop by," Lexie asked.

"Yeah, it's fine," Meredith shrugged and hung up the phone. Not even a minute later there was a knock and she opened the door to see Lexie and Mark there.

"There is my baby girl," Lexie grinned as she took Alison from Meredith and handed Meredith a bag from Starbucks.

"I got you a blueberry muffin and Derek an egg white English muffin," Lexie replied.

"Thanks, Derek is asleep. This little stinker didn't want to sleep at all last night and she was crying so me nor Derek got much sleep," Meredith said and yawned slightly.

"Aw, were you not being good for mommy and daddy?" Lexie said in a baby voice as she was talking to Alison.

"Since you two are here, do you mind watching her for like ten minutes, I need a shower," Meredith asked and Lexie shook her head.

"We got it," Lexie smiled as she sat down on the couch. Meredith hurried upstairs and Mark sat down next to her and watched Lexie interact with the baby.

"She's a cutie," Mark said as he was looking more at Lexie.

"She is, I want one," she said and the looked at a very terrified Mark, "not now. I mean in like five or so years, after my residency."

"Oh. Yeah. That would be nice," he nodded.

"Mark, don't get scared. I can't handle a baby right now, work is too important to me," Lexie assured him.

"It's fine, I like the idea of you being a mother someday," he smiled and she blushed. They sat and just watched the new things she had developed since the last time they saw her. After a few minutes, a half awaken Derek and a fussy Everleigh made their way down the stairs.

"Good morning," Mark said in a cheerful voice and Derek just glared at him.

"It's nearly lunch, I've gotten barely four hours of sleep, and I never would have thought I would miss Ma this much," he grumbled and went into the kitchen. Mark followed him into the kitchen to hear more of his complaining.

"Come on, it can't be that bad," Mark smiled as he handed him the breakfast that they got him.

"Oh it's not, when they are happy. They are on separate schedules so Alison likes to sleep during the day while this one sleeps at night. Plus their right on schedule with their feedings. Every three hours they know," he grumbled as he tried to juggle Evie in his arms while he tried to eat.

"Here," Mark said as he reached for Evie. Derek handed her over as he went straight for coffee.

"Giving your dad a hard time? That's my girl," Mark smiled as he talked to a now happy Evie.

"I think she's been hanging out with her uncle Mark way too much, picking up on your habits," Derek said as he was eating his muffin.

"It's a good thing," Mark smiled and returned to the living room with Lexie and Alison. Alison had fallen asleep in Lexie's arms and Mark sat down next to Lexie with an awake Evie.

"Derek was right," Mark said as he nodded at the two girls.

"What?" Lexie asked.

"They are on different schedules," Mark said as he refereed to the girls.

"I wonder if Meredith wants me to wake her up and try and keep her awake," Lexie asked Mark and he shrugged.

"Derek!" Mark called and Derek came into the living room with a coffee cup in his hands.

"Yeah?" he asked as he went to sit down on the chair near the couch.

"Do you w ant me to wake her up so you guys can fix their schedule?" Lexie asked. Derek shrugged and sipped his coffee.

"I don't know, you can try. But she gets really angry," Derek said.

"Alright," Lexie said as he tried to wake her up but she wouldn't even budge.

"Just like her mom," Derek chuckled as he continued to sip her coffee.

"What was that?" Meredith said as she came downstairs, a new burst of energy came along with her shower. Her hair was thrown into a bun as she came and sat down on Derek's lap.

"Alison is asleep, again," He pointed to the newborn in Lexie's arms.

"We really need her schedule fixed," Meredith frowned slightly as she walked over and picked up Alison and started to poke at her stomach and move her arms.

"Good luck," Derek said as he finished his coffee.

"Come on little monster," Meredith said as she continued to pester the baby until she started to cry.

"Good one Mer," Mark laughed as he held a quiet Evie still.

"I got this," Meredith said as she laid her on the play mat, facing her toward the toys. She stopped crying once she saw the bright colors and patterns of the play mat.

"Let's see how long it last," Derek said as he returned with another cup filled with coffee.

"I say about thirty minutes," Meredith said as she got down next to her and moved the toys around toward her face.

"I got the night shift tonight so we better get going," Lexie said as she stood up along with Mark. Mark handed Everleigh over to Derek and walked over toward the door.

"Thanks for stopping by," Meredith said as she hugged Lexie goodbye and the two of them left.

"That was nice," Meredith continued to play with Alison as she cooed at the toys above her. Derek sat on the couch with a content Evie snuggled into his arms as he watched Meredith interact with Alison.

"Maybe they will notice each other," Derek said as he smiled and laid Evie next to Alison. He returned to the couch and waited to see what would happen. Alison continued to coo at the toys and Meredith and Evie turned her head to see what the noise was. When she saw her sister, she started to coo along and kick her feet. Alison then turned to look at Evie and she also began to coo back at her.

"We are going to have our hands full," Meredith said as she looked up at Derek and smiled. He returned the smile and nodded. Meredith returned her attention to the babies as they played together on the play mat. Derek got up and got on the floor with them, playing along as he spun one of the toys attached to the mat.


	28. Chapter 28

_Chapter XXVIII_  
 _500 Miles_

 _When I wake up_  
 _Well I know i'm gonna be_  
 _I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you_  
 _When I go out_  
 _Yeah I know I'm gonna be_  
 _I'm gonna be the man that goes along with you_  
 _When I come home_  
 _Yeah I know I'm gonna be_  
 _I'm gonna be the man who's coming home to you_

* * *

"Are you sure you are alright with me going to work?" Derek asked and Meredith nodded.

"We will be fine. Susan is stopping by before she goes to work," Meredith said as she bounced Evie in her arms.

"I don't want to leave my girls," he sighed.

"Well we need daddy to make the money while mommy can't," she said as she talked in her high-pitched baby voice.

"It's Halloween, I want to take them trick-or-treating," he said, taking Evie from Meredith.

"Why? Derek they are barely six weeks old, I don't think they will care," Meredith groaned.

"No but I still think it would be cute to dress them up," he replied.

"I'm not arguing, we can wait until next year when they can walk," she replied taking Evie back from him and placing a quick kiss on his lips.

"Say bye bye daddy," Meredith said as she took Evie's hand and waved with it.

"Bye sweet girl," he said, kissing the top of her head then going over to a sleeping Alison and kissing her head. He walked out the door and locked it on the way out. Meredith sat down and just looked at Evie. She was looking up at Meredith with a large smile and let out a tiny giggle.

"Is that a poop face?" she furrowed her brows at her and she kicked her feet and cooed.

"Evie, you couldn't have did it while daddy was still here?" Meredith groaned as she stood up and took her over to the changing table they had in the living room. Meredith checked her diaper and was slightly stunned that she was dry and hasn't soiled her diaper.

"Were you just smiling and giggling at mommy?" Meredith said in a smile. Evie replied with another large grin and another small giggle.

"Did you learn to giggle along with that adorable smile?" Meredith laughed slightly and Evie kicked her feet at her and wiggled. Meredith picked her up and took her over to the playmat. She sat her on her back and turned one of the toys on.

"I'll be back," Meredith quickly walked to the kitchen and grabbed a mug of coffee. She heard crying from the living room and she took a sip of the coffee and hurried back into the living room.

"I'm sorry baby," Meredith said as she lifted a crying Everleigh up. She bounced her until she stopped crying and settled against Meredith's chest. There was a knock on the door and Meredith quickly hurried and opened the door for Susan.

"Good morning my sweet girl," Susan said with a smile as she took Evie into her arms.

"Morning Susan, do you want to see something new we learned this morning?" Meredith asked.

"What did my smart girl learn?" Susan said in a slight gasp.

"Come on baby girl, do it for mimi," Meredith smiled as she tickled her belly slightly. A tiny giggle escaped to match the large smile on her face.

"Did she just giggle?" Susan gasp.

"She did, my big girl is growing up. It's just been tiny ones this morning but we will work on the bigger ones," Meredith ran her hand over her little head. She looked over at Alison who was starting to stir in her sleep.

"Ali, are you waking up now?" Meredith asked as she went over and picked her up.

"Have you got their schedules worked out now?" She asked.

"For the most part. Alison is finally sleeping at night for a while, she just likes to go to sleep later than Evie," Meredith said as she bounced Alison slightly.

"That's good. Lexie was a night owl when she was younger, I think she took after Thatcher. He likes to stay up at night," Susan said.

"I use to, I thought it was just because I studied through high school, college, and med school and my body got use to it," Meredith shrugged.

"You are more like Thatcher than you think," Susan said as she raised her brow.

"I guess I am."

"Are you taking them trick or treating?" Susan asked.

"No, I don't think they are old enough and I don't have any costumes for them," Meredith shrugged.

"That's true. Lexie went when she was about four months old because you were four and we wanted to take you. She fell asleep half-way through the neighborhood while you were still getting candy," Susan said.

"I don't remember ever going trick or treating," Meredith admitted.

"I think I have some pictures, you were a fairy and Lexie was a pumpkin, it was adorable," Susan smiled.

"Wow, yeah I would like to see them," Meredith replied with a smile. Alison was starting to get fussy as she got hungry. Meredith sat down and got comfortable to feed her.

"What time do you have to go to work?" Meredith asked Susan.

"In a few hours, I can go if you want to spend some time with them," Susan suggested.

"No, please it's fine. I love you being here, I don't think I could handle it alone," she admitted.

"Meredith, you know one day you are going to have to," Susan raised her eyebrow.

"I know. I'll be alone for a few hours today until Derek gets back," Meredith nodded. The idea of being alone with them scared the life out of her. She was suppose to be able to handle it, she was their mother but it still scared her to death.

"Alright, well you know if you need me I will be here in a flash," Susan reminded her.

"Yes, I know. You're such a good grandmother," Meredith smiled.

"I would do anything for these perfect little angels," Susan ran her hand over Evie's head. The little bit of dark hair she was born with had started to fall out. Meredith just nodded and put Ali against her shoulder, patting her back to burp her.

"Do you want me to cook you some breakfast?" Susan asked as she and Meredith switched babies so she could feed Evie.

"You don't have to unless you want to," Meredith shrugged.

"I will go find something to fix," Susan smiled as she took Alison with her to the kitchen.

"My girl," Meredith smiled as she ran her hand over the brown hair. Evie starred up at Meredith as she held on to Meredith's shirt. Evie finished up eating and Meredith went to the kitchen to see what Susan was doing.

"Do you need me to take Alison and free up your hand?" Meredith offered as she saw Susan stirring the food with one hand.

"No, I'm good. I have experience with working just one handed," Susan smiled in reply.

"Alright," Meredith nodded as she sat down at the kitchen table. Evie slowly fell asleep in Meredith's arms so she placed her into the swing they had in the kitchen. She turned it on low and waited as Susan was cooking.

"Alright, just let this simmer for a few more minutes and then it will be finished. I gotta go to work," Susan said as she put Alison in the other swing.

"Ok, thanks again for helping this morning," Meredith smiled as she stood up and hugged Susan goodbye. Susan left and it was just Meredith. Both girls were asleep soundly so she took the time to quickly eat her food. She cleaned up the kitchen while they slept. The front door opened and Meredith looked over to see Evie's eyes pop open immediately.

"I'm home," Derek said as he came into the kitchen.

"You're early," Meredith said as she reached up and placed a kiss against his lips.

"Work was slow, I'm on call until 6," he said as he went over to Evie. She was cooing at him for his attention.

"Aw, someone missed Daddy," he smiled as he picked her up.

"Susan just left not even an hour ago," Meredith said as she was putting dishes away.

"So you weren't here alone for long?" he asked.

"Izzie is coming by later to get the last of her things," she said.

"Ok, well I am going to shower then I'll come and take care of them so you can maybe take a nap," he said as he handed Evie to her and went upstairs. She just sat in the chair, holding Evie and watching her. No matter how tired she was, all she wanted to do is just watch them because she knew soon they would be growing up and won't need her but that is a long time away.

* * *

 **Author's note: Hey guys, it's been forever since I've updated. I am slowly losing interest in the story because I feel like no one really reads this anymore. I have a few more chapters planned out but after that I am most likely going to end this story. It will have 34 chapters including an epilogue. Thanks for reading!**


	29. Chapter 29

**Author's Note: Merry Christmas Everyone! And of course, I am uploading a Christmas chapter on Christmas. I just want to thank you for the kind words left on the previous chapter. I was having an issue where guest reviews were not posting for twenty-four hours but I fixed it to where they post immedietly, I think. Anyway, I really loved how this chapter turned out. Though some were asking that i continue but I really don't know where else this is going so I am going to do a few time jumps in the next few chapters before I post the epilogue but no worries, I already have an amazing story I am planning to start after this one is complete. I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas and hopefully I will post before the New Year.**

* * *

 _Chapter XXIX_  
 _Let It Snow_

 _Oh the weather outside is frightful_  
 _But the fire is so delightful_  
 _And since we've no place to go_  
 _Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow  
It doesn't show signs of stopping_  
 _And I've brought some corn for popping_  
 _The lights are turned way down low_  
 _Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow_

* * *

Derek watched as Meredith starred out the window of the plane. She nervously held Evie in her arms in a cute Christmas onesie. Alison sat quietly between them in her car seat, sound asleep from the smooth motions of the airplane.

"Do you want me to get her for a little so you can sleep? There's still three hours left on the flight," he offered.

"Yeah, since it's going to be 11am when we get there, we won't be able to sleep until tonight," she said as she handed Evie to him. She leaned her head against the neck pillow and was fast asleep, Evie on the other hand was not.

"I'm happy you're awake but when we get to Manhattan, you are going to be sleepy and grumpy," Derek frowned and her face just lit up with a smile.

"You don't want daddy to worry, do you?" He asked and she smiled again at him but she added a coo with it.

"I thought you were going to sleep through the flight but it turns out your sister is a sleep flyer and you are not," he said as he was talking to her.

He laid the seat back a little and put her on his chest, hoping she would fall asleep. He was correct when she slowly fell asleep on her chest. He drifted off into a sleep also but was awoken by the flight attendant saying buckle up and prepare for landing. He looked down and saw Evie was still sleeping along with Meredith and Alison. He reached over and shook Meredith slightly to put her seat belt on.

"I can't believe Alison slept the whole flight," he said as he was trying to buckle himself with Evie in his arms.

"Me either, and I thought she was going to stay awake," she motioned at Evie.

"Mark, wake up," Derek said as he reached across the isle and hit Mark. He jumped slightly and looked at Derek.

"What the hell?" He groaned.

"We are landing, buckle up Lex," Derek replied.

"It's snowing," Meredith said as she looked out the window.

"Look's like they are going to have a white Christmas for their first Christmas," Derek smiled as he referred to the girls.

"I haven't seen snow on Christmas since med school but of course I didn't really celebrate Christmas so it didn't matter to me," she noted.

"The last time I seen snow on Christmas was when I was 10," Lexie said.

"Me and Der are use to it," Mark spoke up. Derek nodded in agreement as he slowly rubbed circles on Evie's back to sooth her as the plane was descending. Alison stayed asleep while Evie began to wake up as they were getting their things together to get off the plane. Meredith grabbed the wrap and placed it around her, sticking Evie in between so she could carry her easily. Derek grabbed Alison's car seat and his carry-on bag.

"I'll get Meredith's bag," Mark said as he grabbed her bag. Meredith got the babies bag and they got off the plane and headed for baggage claim.

"It's so much colder it feels like," Lexie said as they were walking through the airport.

"It's the same temperature Lex," Derek said.

"Maybe seeing the snow makes it feel colder," she shrugged.

"Who is picking us up?" Mark asked as he started to grab bags from the conveyor belt.

"Ma," he said as he took his luggage and attached his carry-on bag to it.

"Where is she?" he asked looking around.

"Maybe she is outside," Derek shrugged.

"I see her," Meredith smiled and waved as Carolyn started making her way to them.

"They have gotten so big!" Carolyn exclaimed as she went over to hug Meredith carefully.

"Yes, they missed their nana too," Meredith smiled, remembering how it was right after she left.

"I missed them, and I missed you guys. How are you Lexie?" Carolyn smiled at Lexie. She was very fond of her, especially because how different Mark was with her. She was really straightening him up.

"I'm good, I have never been to New York so I am excited," Lexie smiled.

"Well after Christmas we can show you around New York," Carolyn smiled.

"Let's get going, Kathy and Liz can't wait to meet these two precious babies," Carolyn smiled as she helped Meredith with her bags. They went out to the car, Derek and Meredith attached the car seats in the back of the SUV, she sat in between them while Mark and Lexie got the middle row. Derek sat up front with his mother and they made the thirty minute drive right outside the city where Carolyn's house was.

"Wow, that's a lot of kids," Meredith noted as there were tons of kids in the front yard playing in the snow.

"That's not even all of them, Nancy isn't here yet," Carolyn smiled back at Meredith.

"How many kids does Nancy have again?"Meredith asked.

"Four, three girls and one boy," Mark said.

"Wow," Meredith was shocked at all the children. They parked the car and started to unload the car before they were bombarded with people.

"Derek!" a tall, brown haired woman said as she hugged Derek. She looked like a mix between Nancy and Derek. She was extremely beautiful with her curled hair, she looked almost like a model.

"Kathy," he smiled as he hugged his sister.

"Can't even say hello to your favorite sister," another woman joked. This one also had brown hair and looked exactly like Carolyn.

"Liz, you know I love you," Derek joked as he hugged the woman.

"Meredith, this is my sister's Kathleen and Elizabeth," Derek introduced them.

"About time I meet the famous Meredith that is lucky to have my little brother's heart," Liz smiled as she hugged Meredith.

"Liz, you are only 16 months older than I am," he grumbled.

"Where are those precious nieces of mine," Kathy said as she looked for them.

"In the car, you guys can get them out if you want," Meredith barely got the words out before Liz was the first one to climb in after them.

"They are so cute! Which one is which?" Kathy asked as she held one while Liz had the other.

"You have Everleigh and Liz has Alison," Derek said.

"It's too cold for you guys to be out here, let's go inside so you can meet some of your cousins," Kathy said to Evie as she bounced her up and down. Both the girls seemed contient as they carried them inside.

"I don't think I am going to be seeing them much for the next few days," Meredith said as she grabbed her luggage.

"Nope," Derek shook his head as he grabbed his also. They went inside and to Derek's old room to put down their stuff.

"You played an instrument?" Meredith asked as she saw an instrument case sitting in the floor.

"I played sax in high school and I can play the piano thank you," he said matter-of-fact.

"Mhm, well I didn't know you were so talented," she smirked as she leaned up and kissed him deeply. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close as their lips intertwined.

"Mmm, I'll have to show you more of my talents later," he whispered in her ear and she giggled.

"Let's go downstairs," she laughed and started back down the steps. They went into the living room where a shorter woman stood along with a man. She looked almost identical to Derek, being the only other family member with black hair and blue eyes.

"Amy!" Derek said surprised as he went and gave his sister a hug.

"DerBear," she smiled as she hugged him back.

"Amy, this is Meredith. The girls are with Liz and Kathy," he said as he looked at the man next to his baby sister. He had an army combat uniform on, his hair was a reddish-brown color and he had light blue eyes.

"Hi Meredith, nice to finally meet you. Ma has told me a lot about you. I'm Amelia by the way, the only one allowed to call me Amy is Derek," she joked.

"Who is this," he pointed to the man next to her.

"Derek, this is my fiancé, Major Owen Hunt," she said to him, introducing Owen to Derek.

"Nice to meet you," Owen smiled as he reached out his hand. Derek was slightly skeptical but shook his hand anyway.

"I'm going to go find the babies," Meredith said as she quickly escaped from the conversation.

"You too, what do you do?" Derek asked.

"I'm a trauma surgeon in the military, currently back for a few weeks before I finish up my term," he said with a nod.

"Ah, how long you got?" Derek asked.

"Four more months," he smiled.

"Alright, well when did you two meet?" Derek looked at the man and his sister.

"About two years ago on one of my leaves, I had witnessed a car accident and I helped the victim and was rushed with them to the hospital where your sister was the intern assigned to the case and we just hit it off," he smiled as he wrapped his arm around Amelia.

"Yeah, and I couldn't say no when he asked if we could go out and I've fallen head over heels," she giggled as she leaned up and kissed him quickly.

"Why didn't you tell me Ames?" He frowned.

"Because Der, no one knew until a few months ago when he came to visit for the weekend and proposed," she said.

"You could have told me," he said.

"Well I wanted to tell you in person so when I asked if you would walk me down the isle, you couldn't say no to your baby sister," she smiled cheekily.

"Amy, i could never say no. It's an honor and I know dad would want me to," Derek said has his eyes started to tear up as he hugged his little sister again.

"Look who I found," Meredith said cheerfully as she held Everleigh while Carolyn followed with Alison.

"There is daddy's little princesses," he smiled as he took Alison from Carolyn.

"Aw, my new nieces are so adorable. You guys are lucky they look so much like their mother," Amelia grinned.

"Hey!" Derek said offended.

"I'm just kidding Der," she laughed as she looked at them both.

"Wow, they really are twins," she looked at both of them closely.

"That's what identical means. But it's pretty easy to tell the difference," Meredith said as she pointed out the little differences they had. Alison had more hair and hers was more curly, along with the freckles only Alison had.

"Oh ok. Still won't be able to really tell but let me get my hands on this action," she said as she reached for Everleigh.

"This is Evie," Meredith said as she handed her over.

"Hi Evie, I'm your aunt Amelia but I'll let you call me Amy," she smiled at the baby. Evie gladly smiled back and bounced in her arms.

"They are full of energy," Meredith noted.

"I see," Amelia said as she held the baby tightly. Alison began to get fussy and Meredith knew exactly what she wanted.

"Aw, someone is hungry," Meredith said as she took Alison.

"You can go sit in the study to feed her if it makes you more comfortable, that's where we hid all the presents so the kids aren't allowed in there," Carolyn whispered.

"I'll be back," Meredith smiled before she left with a fussy Alison.

"After she's done, Evie is going to want to eat," Derek told Amelia.

"I figured, but doesn't mean I can't spend a little time with my newest niece before everyone else attacks her again," Amelia smiled down at the baby. After fifteen minutes, Meredith was back with Alison, switching the two out and going to feed the other. Evie took longer to eat due to the fact she liked to eat but in no time they were back in the living room.

"Aunt Nan is here!" a little girl came running into the living room.

"Hey Nance," Derek smiled as he hugged his eldest sister.

"I miss you little brother," Nancy smiled but her face faded when she saw Meredith.

"And you brought along the slutty intern Addison told me about," Nancy said with a pleased look on her face. Amelia's eyes went wide along with Meredith's. Both babies immedietly started crying, Amelia and Meredith left before the fighting started.

"Nancy, what the hell was that," Derek said in a hushed tone.

"What do you mean? I thought you would have gotten some sense knocked into you when she told you she was pregnant," Nancy scoffed.

"Those twins, they are our kids. And she isn't some slutty intern. She is the love of my life, if anything you should be calling your best friend Addison and talking to her because last time I checked everything was fine between the three of us. Now you need to apologize because anything that was said about Meredith is a lie. She is an amazing mother to my children and a damn good woman. And if you don't fix the attitude, we are leaving and you can explain to mom why we left. Understood?" He jumped down her throat, his blood was boiling after he chased down Meredith. He heard his mother also scolding her oldest daughter for her behavior but he wasn't worried about that. He was only worried about Meredith.

"Are you alright?" he asked as he found her in the den with Amelia and some of his nieces and nephews.

"Mhm, I won't let it bother me. Wasn't she and Addison best friends?" Meredith seemed unfazed by the comment his sister made.

"She had no right," he shook his head.

"It's fine, I won't let it ruin our trip. Looks like Alison likes Amelia better than you," she teased as Amelia was sitting across the room, Alison laid in her lap looking up at her and giggling.

"Oh no way, she is a daddy's girl forever. I think she is just mistaken Amelia for me," he chuckled and Amelia glared up at him.

"No way, she knows that I am way prettier than her daddy," Amelia said the last part toward Ali and she just giggled. Carolyn joined them with an apologetic look on her face.

"Meredith, I'm so sorry about Nancy. She didn't know much of what happened between you all in Seattle, she didn't even keep in contact after Addison when Derek and Addison got together again," Carolyn stated.

"It's ok Carolyn, I can't let her feelings toward me ruin my babies first family Christmas," she smiled at Carolyn.

"You are too kind," she smiled as she hugged Meredith.

"They really have showed me a new side to the world, and Derek really help also," Meredith smiled up at him.

"Alright, I'm going to go make a lot of hot chocolate so we can get ready for the story," Carolyn said as she left.

"Story?" Meredith questioned.

"Every year, Ma makes tons of hot chocolate for everyone and we all squeeze into the living room and each year me and my sisters takes turns reading Twas The Night Before Christmas, it's a tradition," Derek explained.

"Who's turn is it this year?" Meredith asked.

"Mine, last year it was Derek's. We go by age," Amelia said.

"We better go get our seats before everyone piles in there," Derek said as he took Alison from Amelia. They all went to the living room, Kathleen and her husband were already on the couch with Owen and the kids all piled around the recliner where the reader sat. Meredith and Derek took the love seat, they cuddled next to each other. Alison sat in Derek's arm that was rested against the arm rest while Evie laid against Meredith's chest. She had fallen asleep already and was unfazed by the noisy living room. Lizzie came from the kitchen with a dozen or so hot coco mugs on a tray, Carolyn came behind her with the rest. Each child that was over five was handed a mug carefully, along with each adult. The fireplace was lit and everyone settled into their seats while Amelia began reading the story.

The kids all stayed quiet during the reading, some even falling asleep in the floor. By the time it was over, almost all the kids were asleep on top of another and there were 14 Shepherd children asleep in the floor. All the adults carefully went up to their rooms and settled in for the night, except Carolyn who spent most of the night setting up all the toys from Santa quietly so the kids didn't stir.


	30. Chapter 30

_Chapter XXX_  
 _This Is Home_

 _Wherever you are_  
 _That's where I wanna be_  
 _All it took was a ring in that soft sunset_  
 _Baby blue eyes welled up and said_  
 _This is home_  
 _In the refrigerator light_  
 _Never look so good_  
 _Holding you tight_  
 _Kissing all I could saying_  
 _I am home_  
 _And that's where I want to be_  
 _Yeah wherever you're with me_

* * *

"Are you almost ready?" Derek called up as he was sitting on the couch, a fully dressed Alison sitting on his lap. They had learned to sit up by themselves finally. Alison was dressed in a baby blue onesie with a purple flower on the chest and black leggings. Derek had on his lucky red shirt and jeans. He and Meredith were having a date night so they were taking the girls to Susan and Thatcher's for the night.

"Almost," she called as she was upstairs. She finally came down with a casual sweater and jeans. Evie was dressed in a pink onesie with a grey elephant on the chest and black leggings also, she and Ali may have been identical twins but there were differences that could definitely be told between the two especially with their personalities and favorites.

"You look gorgeous," he smiled as he stood up and held Ali on his hip.

"Thanks, let's get going," Meredith said as she grabbed the diaper bag for the girls and headed out the door first. They put each of them in their car seats and then he came over and opened the door for her to get in the car.

"Being a gentleman tonight?" She raised her brow.

"I'm always a gentleman," he laughed.

"Oh of course," she giggled in return.

"Just get in," he smacked her butt softly and she scoffed.

"Bossy, tonight you get lots and lots of sex," she whispered the last line and he raised his brow. She smirked as she got into the car, he closed the door and hurried to her side. They drove over to Susan and Thatcher's, Derek got out and started to get out all the things they would need tonight including their play pen and two bouncer's and a huge diaper bag full of the small necessities and Meredith's many bags of milk.

"I'll come help get them," Susan said from the front door as she hurried out to the car. She took Alison's car seat while Meredith got Evie's and they went inside.

"Hey Thatcher, you need me to set up the play pen or can you?" Derek asked as he sat down the many baby items in the living room.

"I'll get it, I think I can manage," he joked.

"You know their schedule, right?" Meredith asked Susan.

"Yes, they eat at 6 then again at 10 then you put them to bed and they will wake up when they are hungry," Susan assured her.

"Yes, and I brought a ton of diapers and three outfits each because little miss Evie likes to make a mess when she eats so make sure she wears a bib," Meredith smiled as she ran her finger over Evie's nose and she giggled.

"Alright, we got this. You crazy kids go have fun," Susan smiled as she started to push them out the door.

"Thanks again!" Meredith said as she was walking out the door.

"Love you two, be safe!" Susan called from the front door as Meredith and Derek were getting into the car.

"I want to show you something before we go eat," he smiled as he backed the car up and headed for the ferry docks.

"Ok," she questioned him as they winded down back roads to where they landed at the ferry dock. He pulled on to the boat and parked the car in the lower deck.

"Come on," he smiled as he took her hand and lead her to the top deck.

"Your thing for ferryboat's, huh?" She smiled as she held on to his hand.

"Mhm, the view is so gorgeous this time of day," he said as he was looking out at the city.

"It is," she nodded in agreement, laying her head against his shoulder.

"I love you," he said as he kissed the side of her head.

"I love you too," she wrapped her arm around his and stood leaned against him. They just watched as the boat slowly made it to the familiar island they knew.

"We are going to see your land?" She questioned as she looked up at him.

"Maybe, but it won't be the trailer we are seeing," he winked at her as they went back down to the car. They drove through the wooded area to find the familiar driveway. The continued the dirt path, passing the trailer that held many memories for them.

"Remember the first time I came to stay the night with you?" She laughed at the memory.

"How could I forget? You seemed surprised when you woke up and went outside to find that bear," he chuckled and she hit his arm.

"It's not funny! Bears are scary," she pouted.

"You're right, bears are very very scary," he snickered only a little as he rested his hand on her knee. They kept driving until the land cleared out into an open field where there was a cliff hanging that could see out to the bay.

"Derek, it's so pretty," Meredith smiled as she looked out at the view. Derek got out and came to open her door, helping her step out into the damp ground. The sun was beginning to set over the hills and it was just the perfect view.

"I was thinking this would be our view every morning we woke up from the house," he said as he grabbed on to her hand and walked around the property in all the places he planned on putting all the rooms. They had only just really started talking about the house recently, knowing it would be soon that he would get everything he had ever wanted. He took her back to the edge of the cliff and grabbed both of her hands.

"Derek, this is amazing," she smiled as she leaned up and kissed him, a slow and steady kiss.

"Meredith, there is something I have been wanted to ask you - well tell you. We have two beautiful little girls and I know we are going to spend forever in each other's lives but I want to make it official. I want to be able to call you my wife. You are the love of my life and I couldn't imagine my life without you and our girls. Meredith Elizabeth Grey, I want to spend the rest of my life with you and I guess you can say this is a proposal, but I would like to think of it as a promise," he said as he pulled out the ring, his mother's ring.

She gasp as tears streamed down her face, never would she have imagined this ever happening. She was never one to dream of the big proposal and the fancy big church wedding but standing in front of Derek, that's all she wanted. She wanted a life with him, to wake up every morning with his gross morning breath and occasional five o'clock shadow.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, so I guess this is me accepting your promise and promising the same thing," she giggled as she let him slide the ring on her finger. She jumped into his arms and let out a loud giggle as he lifted her higher into the air and spun her around.

"I love you Meredith," he said in a whisper as he put her down gently, resting his forehead against hers.

"I love you Derek," she smiled and a giggle escaped her lips as she pressed them against his. Their forever was about to begin.


	31. Chapter 31

**Hey guys! I should have updated a while ago but I have had the flu for the last week and a half and I still can't seem to shake it! But I finally got the energy to get out of bed and find my laptop in order to post this for ya! Hope you guys have got a better start to 2017 than I have. Much love xoxo**

* * *

 _Chapter XXXI_

 _Tenerife Sea_

 _You look so wonderful in your dress_

 _I love your hair like that_

 _The way it falls on the side of your neck_

 _Down your shoulders and back_

 _We are surrounded by all of these lies_

 _And people who talk to much_

 _You got this kind of look in your eyes_

 _As if no one knows anything but us_

* * *

 _ **3 years later...**_

Meredith took a deep breath as she looked into the mirror. Her hair curled and surrounded her face, a cream tight-fitted dress over her body. She never imagined herself getting married, especially to the one night stand she was determined to forget.

"You look gorgeous," Carolyn spoke from the doorway.

"Thank you," Meredith smiled as she invited her inside.

"I never thought I'd see the day that Derek looked happier than when he held the girls but I just saw him and he seemed like he was on cloud 9," Carolyn smiled as she approached Meredith.

"Really? Does he seem nervous?" She asked as she tried to steady her own hands. She knew she loved Derek and this was what she wanted but she was terrified.

"A little, but very confident. I knew from the moment we met that you were the one for Derek sweetheart. You don't need to be nervous, everything is perfect," Carolyn smiled as she placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I know. I'm just scared I'm going to fall or mess up," she admitted.

"Don't be. Because you won't," Carolyn reassured her.

"Where are Ali and Evie?" Meredith asked.

"Susan and Thatcher are with them in Derek's room," she said.

"Ah, well can you go get them? I think I just need to hold them for a minute," she smiled and Carolyn nodded and left. A moment later and two little girls came darting through the doorway. Their dirty blonde hair laid in curls also but each had a flower headband tied into their hair. Their dresses were a pale pink color and they each were barefoot. There wasn't much difference in the two of them except Alison has many freckles across the bridge of her nose while Evie had the cutest dimples when she smiled.

"Mama! You a princess!" Everleigh exclaimed as she looked up at her.

"I am sweet girl," Meredith smiled as she lifted her up.

"Up mama!" Alison jumped up and down as she held her arms up to Meredith. She picked her up also and put her on the opposite hip of Everleigh.

"Oh, you both are too big for mama to hold you at the same time," Meredith said as she was juggling the two of them.

"But we your babies?" Evie questioned.

"You are, but you're getting so big," she kissed each of their cheeks before putting them down.

"Are you ready?" Susan asked.

"Mhm, you girls go with nana and mimi, listen to them and be good please," she said as she leaned down and kissed the both of them.

"Tay!" They both said in sync. Carolyn and Susan took the girls out and Thatcher was left with Meredith alone.

"You look beautiful Mer," Thatcher said as he looked at her up and down.

"Thanks dad," Meredith smiled weakly as she pulled him into a hug.

"It's going to be amazing, you are probably nervous but it will be fine," he whispered into her hair.

"What if I fall?" She whispered.

"You won't, I'll be there and make sure you don't fall," he said as he squeezed her a little for reassurance. They stood there for another minute before they pulled apart.

"You ready?" He asked.

"Yes, lets go," she said as she looked in the mirror one more time before going to the back of the church. Everyone was lined up, Cristina and Mark first then Lexie and George, Izzie and Preston were next and behind them were the twins. Off to the side, Meredith stood with Thatcher, her breath hitched in her throat when the music began and people were waking down the isle. She watched as the girls threw most of the petals at the beginning and none were left for the front of the isle. The door closed and the music stopped for a minute, Meredith and Thatcher walked to the door

"You ready?" He asked her and she just looked up at him.

"I don't know, I'm scared," she admitted.

"Don't be," he gave her a reassuring smile and leaned over to kiss the top of her head. She took a couple of deep breathes before she just nodded. The music started and the doors slowly opened. Everyone was standing in awe at her dress and how beautiful she looked. Thatcher took the lead as they walked slowly down the isle.

Derek's heart raced as he saw Meredith coming toward him, his eyes started to water as he quickly stopped the tears. He just smiled at her and she gave him a nervous smile. As she got closer, it was like they were the only two people in the room. She finally got to him, he took her hands and lead her to stand in front of him.

"You did amazing," he mouthed and she smiled. Miranda Bailey was ordained in order to officiate the marriage because she was a big part in their lives.

"So here we are, my intern and my boss are getting married," she joked and most people laughed.

"I'm just playing, but we are here to celebrate the wonderful love and happiness and loyalty between Meredith and Derek. To bring together two people who are in love. I have never seen two people more in love than when I look at the love these two people share. Apart, these are just ordinary people but together they make the world extraordinary. Now it's time for you guys to say the vows so Derek," Miranda nodded at them.

"Meredith, it took me forever to find the right words to say to you and as I'm standing here, I forgot every word I wrote because all I can see is you in that beautiful dress and your hair curled like that. I don't know what else to say except how I couldn't imagine my life without you and without the girls, our girls. I wake up every morning and I thank god that I found someone as loving and extraordinary as you. I promise to love and to cherish you, to be there for you and our girls, and to take care of you even when you are old and senile," he chuckled at the last part along with everyone in the crowd.

"I love you Meredith Grey, and I wouldn't want to spend forever with anyone else," he reached up and wiped the tear that had fell. She smiled at him and laughed a little.

"Meredith, it's your turn," Miranda nodded at her.

"Oh yeah, right," she chuckled nervously.

"Derek, that was beautiful. You know I'm not good with feelings and such so it took me a minute between chasing Ali and Evie around to really write what I wanted to say. It's cheesy because I wouldn't want to tell you how much I love you in any other way," she laughed as she took a small piece of paper from Cristina and opened it up.

"Derek Christopher Shepherd, you are the light of my life. Every day when I wake up and go to wake the girls up, I see so much of you in them. They both have those beautiful blue eyes I love seeing, they have the chubby cheeks just like you, and they both have awful morning breath like you," she looked up to see him laughing as everyone else laughed too.

"I love every single part of you and I promise to love you even when I hate you, to let you cook because I don't want to burn down that amazing house you built our family, and to cherish every little moment I have with you and the girls," she chuckled nervously as her eyes were watering along with his. He shook his head and kissed her briefly.

"Hey, it's not time for that yet!" Miranda said as she swatted at his arm. Everyone laughed and Derek stepped back a little as he took her hands again.

"Anyway, Yang and Mark, give these two kids the rings," Miranda said to them. Cristina handed Meredith the ring and Mark handed Derek the other ring.

"Now Derek, do you take Meredith to be your wife?" Miranda asked.

"I do," Derek smiled as he slid the ring on to her finger.

"Meredith, do you take Derek to be your husband?"

"I do," Meredith smiled as she slid the ring on to his finger.

"By the power vested in me by the state of Washington and by the internet, I now pronounce you husband and wife. There's your cue Derek," Miranda said. Derek smiled as he grabbed Meredith and pulled her close to him. They kissed and everyone stood and cheered. They pulled away for a second, they kissed another time before he pulled away and took her hand.

"I present to you, Mr and Mrs Derek Shepherd," Miranda smiled as both the girls came running to their parents.

"Daddy and mommy are married!" Evie squealed as she was lifted up by Derek.

"And now you can have us a little brother," Alison smiled at her mother. Both Derek and Meredith looked at each other, wide eyed.

"We will talk about that later," Derek smiled at his daughter. The four of them walked back down the isle and out the church doors. They were a happy family of four, for now.


	32. Chapter 32

**Author's note: I know most were expecting the honeymoon chapter but I really didn't feel the need to make a honeymoon chapter. I was going to make this a lot of different snippets of their first year married to each other but I also realized I don't like that many time jumps in one chapter so this is just a single time jump, again. It's ten months after the honeymoon just to give you a little bit of background before jumping right in. This is the last chapter before the epilogue so I'm going to save the sappy thank you for the epilogue. Much love xoxo**

* * *

 _Chapter XXXII_

 _Miracle in the Making_

 _Son your father and I are in love_

 _We've had good times_

 _And we've had rough_

 _But there's one thing we've known_

 _No matter what lies ahead_

 _If there's no roof over our beds_

 _You'll always have a home_

 _Long before you were ever born_

 _We have been waiting for our_

 _Miracle in the making_

* * *

Derek's eyes began to flutter open as he heard the light snores coming from the body beside him. He smiled lightly as he turned on his side, propping himself on his hand as he watched his beautiful wife's chest rise and fall. He cursed to himself when his alarm started going off as he forgot to turn it off. He turned it off but not quickly enough because Meredith groaned loudly, turning her body just slightly to find a different position.

"Good morning," he said as he leaned over carefully to kiss her.

"It's not a good morning, I am sore and I could barely sleep," she managed to sit up in bed as she was trying to catch her breath.

"It'll be better very soon, I promise," he smiled as he ran his hand over her very pronounced stomach.

"Yes because I am officially six days overdue and Addison said if I don't have him by forty-one weeks then she will schedule a c-section and I don't want to deal with that again," she groaned as she managed to sit up out of bed and waddle to the bathroom.

"Mer, everything happens for a reason so I'm sure little Sebastian is just taking after his mother," Derek smiled.

"As I've told a hundred times, we are not naming our son after that crab thing off The Little Mermaid," she said as she stripped her clothing to get into the shower.

"Well I think Drake isn't a good name either," he pouted as he came into the bathroom also.

"Drake is a very cute name! Now get your ass in here. We have an appointment in an hour and we still have to get the twins ready so we don't have time for anything but a quicky," she said as she was stepping into the large shower herself. One of her favorite parts in the house he built was the spacious shower which had a size-able bench normally for leg-shaving but used for sex most of the time.

He smiled lightly, at the beginning of the pregnancy she was horny all the time but after the second trimester she rarely wanted to be touched except for the last few weeks and he happily obliged to her needs. After they were done, he helped wash and rinse the places she couldn't reach due to her large belly.

"What about Ashton?" He asked as he stepped out and grabbed a towel.

"No way, sounds like a girls name. I can't believe we are still arguing about his name and he is going to be here within the next few days," she groaned as she followed him out. She wrapped her hair in a towel and put on a bra and underwear.

"Some parents don't name their kids until they are born," he said.

"With the twins it was easy. It was like their names were just their names from the start," she said.

"Is there any name you have always wanted to name a boy?" She asked and he shook his head, finding some underwear and jeans.

"Not that I know of or can think of."

"Who would have thought picking a boy name would be so complicated," she groaned.

"Because, with a boy name it has to be masculine and strong. It's picking a name that doesn't have a crappy nickname and one that is successful," Derek explained.

"So you want to name him Derek?" she furrowed her brow at him.

"No, not saying that. I really like Christopher," he said.

"I know, because of your father. And Derek you know I will happily agree on that as one of his names but I.."

"I know, you don't particularly care for the name so you won't be calling him Chris or Christopher which is why we are in this predicament," he groaned as he put a shirt on and start to leave the room.

"Yes, and his name has to flow!" She called after him and just shook her head as she was looking through the closet for something that could fit and was comfortable. She reached up to grab a shirt and felt her belly tighten as she was surprised. Although she had been having contractions for three weeks, none of them had felt like she did right then.

"Derek!" She yelled loudly, knowing her was getting the girls dressed so she had to be loud. Her stomach finally loosened after a minute.

"What?" He said as he came in the room with Alison on his hip.

"I think what we did in the shower worked," she smiled.

"You're in labor!" He said, the irritated tone left immediately as a smile appeared.

"Not exactly but I think I will be very soon, I just had a real contraction I'm sure," she said.

"Oh, hear that Ali? You're gonna be getting a baby brother soon," he smiled as he twirled her around.

"Yay! Baby bruder!" She smiled happily.

"Go with daddy to get sissy and you dressed so you can go stay at Mimi and papa's while I go see Addie," Meredith smiled as she kissed Alison's cheek.

"I gonna be a big sister soon," she sang happily with Derek as they hurried off to get Evie up and dressed along with Alison.

Meredith double checked her hospital bag and the bag she had for the girls while they stayed at Thatcher and Susan's house. She started to brush her hair when she was thinking about how different her life has turned out to be than what she thought. She thought she would move to Seattle and become an amazing surgeon and have a wonderful career like her mother. All the plans she had were thrown out when she woke up to a strange man who happen to be her boss on the floor of her mother's living room. She didn't think she would ever know her father but she actually learned a lot and loved her birth father dearly along with Susan. She resented Richard for a little until she realized he was a good man and therefore she couldn't hate him any longer.

Meredith smiled when she felt another contraction. Although they were painful, she knew she was finally going to be able to have the birth she dreamed of with the twins. She grabbed her phone and texted Cristina and Lexie about the contractions and they each congratulated her. She felt something begin to trickle down her leg and panic set in as she knew exactly what it was.

"Derek, it's an emergency!" She yelled out as she sat down on the toilet in order to let the fluid fall freely.

"What?" He said as he rushed into the room.

"My water just broke, we have to go now. I'm about to call Addison," Meredith said with phone in hand.

"I can call Amelia to come pick up the girls and take them to daycare," he said as he went to grab his phone also. Meredith was actually glad when Amelia and Owen told them they would be moving to Seattle and even on the same island they lived on. They lived only 5 minutes away from each other, which was good because Meredith and Amelia had really learned to love each other.

"Yes," she nodded as she grabbed a sanitary napkin so her water wouldn't keep leaking into her pants. She got dressed, this time into some loose jogging pants and one of Derek's shirts. She put the last minute items into her hospital bag and made Derek take it to the car. She took the girls small bag to the car just as Amelia was pulling up.

"Thanks for coming Amy," Meredith said as she got out.

"It's not a problem at all. I don't have to be at the hospital until later and it seems they need you there now," she joked.

"Yes, very much. So the girls are pretty easy to get to eat anything," Meredith explained as she was taking Amelia inside.

"Alright, and do you know where they are going tonight?" Amelia asked.

"Yeah, Susan is going to pick them up from daycare later when she stops by to see me," Meredith said.

"Ok, well I think me and the girls are good if you want to take care of this situation," she said as she rubbed the belly.

"Thanks again Amy," Derek said as he hugged his sister. He then said goodbye to the girls as he went out to the car.

"Soon, you'll be having this feeling and understand," Meredith winked as she hugged Amelia, their stomachs colliding, making it hard to have an actual hug. Amelia was also pregnant, though she was only twenty-eight weeks.

"Hopefully less dramatic," Amelia winked and waved as Meredith left. She hurried herself to the car where Derek helped her get in. Her stomach having contractions but none too bad.

"Call Susan," Derek said as he got in and they made their way to the hospital.

"I will, I don't see why they make this so dramatic in movies," she rolled her eyes as she dialed Susan's number and called her. She told her everything that was happening and promised to keep her updated. Susan sounded very much excited, she was mostly excited it was her first grandson. Molly had three girls and Meredith herself had the twins that was on a streak for girls and she happily broke the streak. It was very rare on the Shepherd side also to be having a boy, but she and Amelia both were having boys.

"I'm gonna call Ma, she's gonna be so happy," Derek said as he took out his phone.

"I know, especially because she'll be meeting him later than she did the twins and all her other grandchildren," Meredith frowned slightly. Although Carolyn wanted so badly to meet the little boy as soon as she could, she wanted to wait until Amelia was farther along so she could stay and be with Amelia for her first birth.

"We have to find a name for him," Meredith groaned as she grabbed the huge baby name book and flipped through where she had post-it notes sticking from names she liked.

"Mer, shouldn't you be like in pain and screaming?" He questioned.

"My contractions hurt but I know they will get worse with time, I'm probably only a few centimeters dilated," she shrugged.

"Didn't you have a lot of pain with the twins?" He asked.

"Yeah, but it was mainly in my back and I don't remember exactly because that was four years ago, but what about Gabriel?" She asked.

"No," he shook his head.

"Elijah?"

"No."

"Kaden?"

"No," he said and she continued to list off names and he shot every single one down.

"Oh, what about this name?" She asked as she showed him the name.

"That's a definite maybe," he smiled.

"I like it, especially with Christopher," Meredith smiled.

"Yes, it does sound really good," he grinned, taking her hand and kissing the back side of her and held it tight. They made it to the hospital and went to the labor and delivery wing. They texted Addison they were there and she made her way to meet them in the lobby.

"Let's hope this is the real deal," Addison smiled as she took them to a room and let Meredith change into a gown and laid her back on the table to do an exam.

"This is probably really weird since our past but I trust you and your medical opinion," Meredith said to her.

"Well, it could be worse. I don't mind and I appreciate it Meredith. I think we've all grown up a lot," Addison smiled.

"I agree, can you tell anything?" Meredith asked.

"Oh wow, Meredith how long have you been contracting?" Addison said as she looked up at her.

"About an hour and a half," Meredith said.

"Well you're dilated to an eight so looks like you two will have a baby sooner than you thought," Addison said.

"Oh wow, really?" Meredith asked. She was shocked, the contractions were painful but not unbearable like with the twins.

"Yep, and you still want the VBAC right?" She asked.

"Yes, definitely. And no medicine," Meredith confirmed.

"Little too late for medicine, I'll go get things set up and we'll get this show on the road so make sure you call everyone you want in here within the next thirty minutes," Addison said before she left.

"Did you hear that?" Meredith gulped. She assumed she would have more time.

"Yeah, we are going to have our boy here soon," he smiled proudly.

"I gotta call Cristina and Lexie and tell them to rush here now, and I gotta tell Susan and update your mother too," she said in a panic.

"Mer, breathe. I'll go get the nurses to page Cristina and Lexie 911 to your room and I'll call my mom, you just worry about updating Susan," he said as he kissed her forehead and left. She grabbed her phone and texted Susan and her father too. She wanted to keep the both of them in the loop. Soon Lexie and Cristina came rushing in.

"We are here," Lexie said breathlessly.

"He isn't out yet?" Cristina frowned.

"No, you're here for moral support," Meredith said as she felt a contraction. They were really picking up, coming only a minute or two apart.

"Well when he starts to come out, I'm out. I love you and you're my person but I don't want to see anything come out your vagina," Cristina said with a look of disgust on her face.

"You will be here Cristina Yang, you can stand next to my head," Meredith scowled at her.

"Shouldn't you be screaming in pain and not arguing with me?" Cristina asked.

"The pain is pretty bad but mainly just uncomfortable with pain during a contraction. It's weird, maybe he's in a different position than the twins because from what I remember I was in horrible, unbearable pain them and now it's bearable," Meredith said.

"That's weird, I hope when me and Mark decide to have babies that my labor will be like that," Lexie said.

"That's very odd," Cristina questioned.

"Don't question it," Meredith said and her eyes bulged as she held her breath.

"I think I gotta push, someone go get Addison, now!" She said urgently.

"I will," Cristina said as she left.

"Lexie, go after her and make sure she comes back. I need my person," Meredith said as she was trying to breathe. Lexie nodded and left after Cristina as Meredith was doing the breathing exercises they learned in birthing class.

"I can't wait, I have to push," she said breathlessly.

"I uh.." Derek froze.

"Derek Christopher Shepherd! Get those gloves because I can't stop!" she said as she let out a loud yelp as she changed position. He snapped into action as he lifted the blankets and saw his son's head crowning.

"He's coming now, I don't know what to do," he said frantically.

"Yes you do, Derek I need to push this hurts!" She screamed as her body involuntarily started to push and she let the urge overwhelm her as she was pushing. Derek tried to remember what he had to do when he was doing his rounds in OB many years ago.

"Oh my god!" She yelled, now she was feeling the pain. Her whole body shook as she concentrated her all into pushing.

"His head is completely out, I'm so proud of you," Derek said as he grabbed his sons head and guided it slowly. She was cursing at him as she let herself stop for a breather. Addison rushed in with a team of nurses along with Lexie and Cristina.

"Oh gross," Cristina grimaced as she quickly moved beside Meredith's head.

"Well, I'm glad you remembered something from your residency," Addison joked as she took over from Derek and he moved to Meredith's head.

"Alright Meredith, the hard part is over. On this next push I need you to give it everything," Addison said and Meredith nodded. The next contraction came and she pushed with all her might.

"You're doing so amazing Meredith," Derek whispered in her ear as he held her hand and brushed her hair.

"Oh my god!" Meredith yelled as she continued to push.

"He's here," Addison said as she pulled his feet out and laid him on the blanket that was on Meredith.

"He's perfect," Derek said as Meredith began crying tears of joy. She giggled as she ran her hand across his head as he was screaming. The nurses were wiping him off as Addison clamped the umbilical cord.

"Meredith, he's beautiful and he has Derek's hair!" Lexie said in awe.

"Ok, I admit I was wrong," Cristina said.

"Derek, do you wanna cut the cord?" Addison asked and he nodded. He wiped his eyes before taking the scissors and cutting the cord.

"Here Dr. Grey, let's put him on your chest so he can stay warm," one of the nurses said as she moved the gown off her chest and placed the baby between her skin and a blanket.

"He's so beautiful," Meredith cried as she kissed the top of his head. Everyone was in awe at the beautiful bond that was being created. The placenta was delivered and the nurses left the baby on her chest for about an hour before they took him and weighed him.

"He's a very healthy eight pounds and six ounces," the nurse said as she moved him back to the warmer as she was doing test. He was just moving his arms and legs around as she was doing apagar test on him. He wasn't screaming or anything, just content laying there with his fist at his mouth.

"Would you like to hold him Dr. Shepherd?" The nurse asked as she started to put a diaper on him and wrap him into a blanket.

"Yes," he nodded as he went over and took him from her.

"We will give you guys some privacy and be back in a few hours to take him to the nursery for some testing and the usual," the nurses said before leaving and it was just the five of them left.

"He's so precious," Lexie said in awe.

"Derek, let his godmother hold him," Meredith said with a smile.

"Me?" Cristina asked.

"Yes," Meredith smiled as she nodded. Cristina was a little hesitant before she took him.

"Aw, I never thought I would see Cristina hold a tiny baby," Lexie smiled.

"Well, now you have. Hi little man," Cristina said in a child-like voice. Cristina held him for a few minutes before Lexie got him from her.

"Hi there, I'm your aunt Lexie," lexie smiled as she bounced him slightly. He was starting to fall asleep as he was content and very quiet.

"I don't want to jinx it but I think we have a very calm baby," Meredith smiled at Derek.

"Me too," he said back. He started to move his head around like he was searching for food so Lexie handed him back. Meredith let him latch on to her breast and he was a natural.

"Knock knock," Susan said as she entered the room with Thatcher. Meredith covered herself as they came in.

"Aw, he was born!" Susan said in awe.

"Yes, about an hour and a half ago. It was very quick," Meredith said.

"I'm so proud of you Mer," Thatcher smiled.

"Thanks dad," Meredith said with tears in her eyes. The baby finished eating so she repositioned to where Susan and Thatcher could see him.

"Aw, he's so beautiful!" Susan gushed as she touched his hair.

"Alright, I hate to be pushy but I am about to have to go and I want to know my nephew's name," Lexie said.

"Derek, you want to tell them?" Meredith asked.

"Just spit it out," Cristina said.

"Ok. Well his first name is after my father, Christopher. But since Meredith doesn't want to call him that, we decided he will go by his middle name," Derek said.

"Which is?" Lexie asked.

"Grayson, like after Grey," he said.

"Aw, little Grey isn't going to be me anymore," Lexie smiled. Cristina's pager started going off so she said her goodbye and left.

"Christopher Grayson Shepherd, very cute," Susan smiled.

"I know, we had such a hard time but I saw the name and it just felt like it was his name," Meredith admitted.

"you picked well," Thatcher smiled.

"Thanks dad, you want to hold him?" She offered and he gladly took him.

"Alright, Derek you want to go get the girls so they can meet their brother?" Meredith asked and he nodded and went to go get them.

"I honestly never thought this day would come," Susan admitted.

"What? Seeing him hold his grandchild from me?" Meredith asked confused seeing as she had the twins and he always was there for every event of theirs.

"No, of course I saw this coming by seeing him hold a grandson is nice," she joked.

"Right, I love the girls but they can be quite a handful with their sassiness," Meredith laughed, her girls were her entire world but they could really be extremely sassy. They were such diva's and were spoiled rotten by everyone.

"Mommy!" One of the girls came bouncing in, her dirty blonde hair put up in pigtails courtesy of Amelia.

"Hi Ali," Meredith smiled as she helped her daughter up on the bed.

"Mama!" Evie exclaimed as she came to join her sister, her dirty blonde blonde hair left in the natural curly state.

"Where is our brudder?" Alison asked.

"Right here, you got to be gentle, ok?" Thatcher said as he laid Grayson in Meredith's arms so both girls have the chance to interact.

"He's so pretty mama," Evie said as she touched his head.

"Be gentle," Derek reminded her as he went to stand closer to them.

"Girls, this is your brother Grayson," Meredith said.

"Baby Gray, he's perfect mama," Alison said as she gave her brother a kiss. Everyone awed at the same time and Alison giggled.

"I love him mama," Evie said as she kissed the back of his head.

"And he loves you too, isn't that right Gray?" She said as she smiled at her family all around her. She looked up at Derek and their eyes met, he had the biggest grin on his face as he leaned over to kiss her.

His family was perfect, he had his two little girls that he would be able to love and protect and he had a little boy that he could teach baseball to and go fishing with him. He couldn't ask for anything else in life.


	33. Chapter 33

_Chapter XXXIII_

 _Then_

 _Now you're my whole life_

 _Now you're my whole world_

 _I just can't believe_

 _The way I feel about you girl_

 _Like a river meets the sea_

 _Stronger than it's ever been_

 _We've come so far since that day_

 _And I thought I loved you then_

* * *

 **Epilogue.**

 **6 Years Later...**

"Mama," a little voice said from the edge of the bed. Meredith felt a tug on the sheets. She looked over to see a toddler standing happily just in his diaper. His dark brown curls a mess on his head and his bright blue eyes shined up at her.

"Come on baby boy," she said groggily as she lifted him on to the bed. He climbed directly between her and Derek and laid down.

"This is why I told you he is too little for the toddler bed," Derek groaned as he sat up and reached for pajama pants.

"Big boy!" He repeated as he sat up.

"Yes Bray, you are," he smiled weakly at his youngest son.

"Go make the special breakfast pancakes for Ali and Evie," Meredith mumbled.

"I am," he said as he started to leave the room.

"Wait! Throw me a shirt," she said as she held the sheet tightly against her bare skin. In the past 10 years, she still hadn't learned she needed to put clothes on after sex with Derek before bed.

He rolled his eyes, looking around and grabbing one of his blue t-shirts and throwing it at her. He went upstairs and into his son's room, turning on the light and opening the curtains.

"Grayson, wake up and get a shower before your sisters get up and use all the hot water," Derek said before going back down and getting the ingredients out for pancakes. He grabbed chocolate chips to add into the pancakes and began to cook them. He started coffee and made eggs in a separate pan. Meredith came out of their bedroom with Braiden on her hip. She sat him in the high chair and poured a sippy cup of milk.

"Is Grayson in the shower?" She asked as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

"Yes, they are almost done if you want to get the whip cream out," he said as he checked the other side of the pancake. Meredith went over to the fridge and grabbed the spray bottle of whip cream and frowned when she shook it and it was empty.

"Shit, I forgot we used it all the other night," Meredith blushed slightly at the memory. She remembered everyone saying marriage and kids caused sex to be quick and rare but as time passed they just got more creative.

"Oh well," he shrugged.

"No! Pancakes are a birthday tradition in this house and we are going to keep it that way, I think we have some vanilla icing if that will work," Meredith searched the cupboards until she found a can of unopened icing.

"Is that even still good?" He frowned as he looked at her.

"Yes, now let me do this," she said as she went to the stacks of pancakes, putting two on two different plates as she grabbed a knife and spread the number 10 over both pancakes and put them on the kitchen table. She grabbed the candles and stuck one in each stack. Just as she was finishing, Grayson came down the stairs with his dark brown hair hair still wet and uncombed as he opened the fridge to get something to drink.

"It's time to go wake up your sisters," Meredith said happily as she picked up Bray and started up the stairs. Derek followed along with Grayson slowly tracking along. He was still half asleep, much like his mother normally is but on birthday's she always woke up in a good mood and always adamant about the birthday traditions they had created.

They opened the door and turned on the light to the girl's bedroom. They were both still asleep, Alison was snoring like her mother while Everleigh was curled up in a small ball on her bed.

"Happy birthday girls," Meredith said as she turned on the light.

"Birthday pancakes are waiting on you two," Derek smiled as he stood next to Meredith.

"Sissy, wake up!" Braiden said as he went over to Evie and pulled at her blanket. Alison was the first one to really start to wake up. Her eyes squinted as she grabbed her hair tie and put her messy, dirty blonde hair in a bun.

"I'm awake," Evie groaned from under the blanket.

"Come on, we can't eat until you get up," Alison grumbled as she walked over to her sister and shook her until Evie sat up angerly.

"Run," she said as she threw her blankets off her and chased Alison downstairs as they bypassed Meredith and Derek.

"Girls!" Meredith said chasing after them.

"Your sisters are crazy," Derek shook his head, talking to Braiden as he came downstairs to find Ali and Evie sitting down in front of their plates, Meredith was looking for something in one of the drawers in the kitchen.

"Are you guys going to be in a good mood for your party?" Derek asked as he put Braiden back into his high chair.

"Yes," they both said at the same time.

"Daddy, I wanna stay with aunt Amy tonight," Grayson asked as he sat down in the chair.

"We can ask Amy later. Mer did you find the lighter or matches?" He asked as he looked up at her.

"No, where did we last put it?" She continued to look through all the drawers. Derek looked outside and it was sitting next to the grill.

"Found it," he said as he went outside and grabbed it. He came back and lit both of the candles.

"Never trust me to find that stupid thing," she laughed lightly as she went to stand behind the girls.

"Blow out the candles and make a wish my sweet girls," Meredith smiled as she kissed both of their heads.

"Momm," Ali groaned as she moved away from Meredith.

"You girls will always be my babies," she frowned slightly.

"We are almost preteen's mom," Evie rolled her eyes.

"Doesn't mean you aren't my babies," Meredith replied as she was tearing up a pancake for Braiden.

"Bray is the baby, he's two," Alison said.

"I big boy," Braiden said with a mouth full of pancake.

"You are all my babies," Meredith shrugged.

"Stop arguing," Grayson said with a glare that was exactly like Meredith's.

"I agree," Derek shrugged.

"Fine," Meredith said as she raised her eyebrow at Derek and went to eat herself. They finished their pancakes and both girls raced upstairs to see who would get the bathroom first. Derek went into their bedroom to get a shower. Grayson went upstairs to play in his room. Alison came down the stairs with a look of defeat as she ploped on the sofa.

"Go use your brother's bathroom shower Ali," Meredith told her as she was cleaning up the kitchen.

"My shampoo is in our bathroom," she rolled her eyes.

"Fine," Meredith shrugged as she picked Braiden up and took him upstairs. She looked through his clothes and found a cute green and gray shirt along with light-wash jeans. She put them on him along with green socks. He was babbling away about something as she ran her fingers through his thick curls to allow them to come untangled.

"My sweet boy is growing up," she frowned as she picked him up again and hugged him tightly, kissing his forehead. She put him down and let him walk downstairs with her.

"Now, let's get set up for the party," Meredith said to Bray but she was really talking to herself. She started to set up the drinks and cups along with some snack foods. She had barely over an hour to get it set up because Derek wanted it earlier in the day. Meredith set up streamers on the island and put balloons in a few places including outside on the porch.

Derek came out of their room dressed in a blue button up and casual jeans. His hair was fixed just the way Meredith liked it and he had shaved also which caused him to smell like aftershave when Meredith stopped him and kissed him.

"I love you but you get to finish decorating, I'm going to shower," she said before hurrying into the bedroom. Derek shook his head as he looked around and noticed it was almost fully decorated. Alison was still sitting in her pajama's, playing on the iPad as Evie came downstairs dressed in black jeans and a floral shirt that had red sleeves. Her dirty blonde hair was still wet but brushed. Alison rushed upstairs to get herself a shower before guest started to arrive.

"Daddy, braid my hair please," Evie looked up at him with the sparkle in her eye. He just smiled and nodded his head. He French braided her hair, just like he did Amelia's when he was younger and how he had did their hair a lot since Meredith was still clueless when it came to hair.

"There sweetie," he said as he tied the bottom with a rubber band.

"Thank you," she smiled at him. She looked identical to Meredith other than her blue eyes. He was glad that Alison was also equally as beautiful.

There was a knock on the door before it opened with a little boy come flying in the door past Amelia. Amelia was yelling at him as he almost knocked the huge box from her hand.

"Cooper, I told you to wait on me," she grumbled as she came in after him.

"Sorry, Uncle Derek where is Grayson?" The little brown headed boy asked him.

"Upstairs," Derek pointed as he grabbed the box from his sister.

"Is that our cake!" Evie said excited as she was trying to peek into the box.

"Yes, no looking," he said as he sat it on the counter.

"How's one of my birthday girls," Amelia smiled as she hugged Everleigh.

"Good, where's Uncle Owen and Alyssa?" She asked.

"They should be coming in any minute, Alyssa fell asleep on the way over here," Amelia said as she ran her hand across the braid.

"Ok, I'll go see," she said happily as she ran out the front door.

"I see you are still the master of the French braid," Amelia joked.

"I had enough practice," he rolled his eyes and she laughed as she hit his arm. Owen came in with Evie holding a toddler with bright red hair and freckles all over her face.

"Hi Alyssa," Derek said as Evie brought her over to him.

"Unca Derek!" She squealed as she reached for him.

"Aw I missed you," he said as he took her from Evie.

"I missed you too," she said as she kissed his cheek.

"Go play with Evie and Bray, ok?" He said as he put her down. She nodded and followed Evie who went to get her little brother.

"Hey Owen," Derek smiled as he shook his hand.

"Hey, place looks nice," he looked around.

"Thanks, Mer did most of the decorating," he said as he shoved his hands into the jean pockets. Meredith must have sensed her name because she came out of the bedroom fully clothed in a lavender sweater and black jeans, her hair blow dried and left natural.

"Cristina just texted me and said she's on her way," Meredith said as she went over to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water.

"Is she bringing Zola? I haven't seen her since she was seen at the hospital a few weeks ago," Amelia said, she was the one in charge of her surgery. Alex started an surgery program that brought kids from the rural parts of Africa that normally wouldn't get help with their medical conditions and flew them to get surgery. Zola had spina bifida which Amelia fixed and then Cristina got attached to her very quickly because they thought she had some heart problems but turned out she just had a slight murmur that was harmless and would go away once she was older and her heart had developed more.

"Mhm, and we have to make her feel welcomed because she still doesn't know a whole lot of English but she's learning," Meredith said.

"How old is she again?" Owen asked.

"Nine, she misses home but she is super happy with Preston and Cristina," Meredith smiled.

"Do her and the twins get along good?" Amelia asked.

"Yeah, mostly. She's more close with Alison for some reason but I guess it's because they each have their own set of friends so," Meredith just shrugged.

"Derek, have you checked on the girls present and made sure it hasn't torn anything apart?" Meredith asked as she thought about it.

"What did you get them?" Amelia questioned.

"An Australian Shepherd puppy, it's a few months old and it's adorable," Meredith smiled.

"I'll go check on it," Derek said as he walked outside and Owen followed him.

"I wish I had gotten a puppy for one of my birthday's," Amelia frowned.

"They have been wanting one for years so I finally broke down and agreed to it, she's the sweetest and cutest thing ever," Meredith gushed.

"I can't wait to see their reaction. Is Lexie and Mark coming?" Amelia asked.

"Honestly I depends on how Sawyer is feeling, he's been having a lot of fits when he is around too many people he doesn't know," Meredith explained.

"Well, hopefully he will grow out of it, he has a huge family that he will have to get use to," Amelia frowned.

"I told Lexie that but she's so overprotective which I understand because I was the same way with the girls until Derek really pushed me to get them to socialize and be around people."

"Yes, though Cooper has always been an outgoing baby and child like me, sometimes it's scary how he can just talk to anyone and everyone but he is the light of my life," Amelia smiled.

"That's what happens when you become a mother," Meredith giggled as she covered her mouth.

"A love that could never be broken," Amelia nodded. Derek and Owen came in along with Cristina and Preston and Zola.

"Hi Zola, it's nice to see you again," Meredith smiled as she hugged the girl.

"You too Meredith, where Alison at?" She asked in her Malawi accent.

"She's upstairs I think," Meredith said and Zola made her way up.

"How has it been?" Meredith asked Cristina as she hugged her.

"Good, this being a mom thing isn't that hard," Cristina said.

"Just wait, you didn't have to change dirty diapers and deal with three am feedings but now you get the hormones coming soon," Meredith winked at her. All the men went outside as they all grabbed a beer.

"I can handle that, she's such a sweet girl and I'm happy that Preston talked me into agreeing to adopt her," Cristina smiled at her.

"You guys are officially going to adopt her?" Meredith said shocked and Cristina nodded.

"Congratulations Cristina!" Amelia smiled.

"Thanks. We haven't told her yet but I think she'll be happy," Cristina said confidently.

"I'm happy for you, I honestly never thought you would have kids nor adopt one," Meredith said.

"Well she needed us as much as we need her right now. We are in a good place and I can focus on work and still be a good mother," Cristina said.

"Never thought I would live to see the day where Cristina Yang is a mother," Meredith smiled as she hugged her person. There was a knock on the door and Meredith went to open it. Alex and his very pregnant wife Jo was at the door.

"Hi guys, come in," Meredith stepped aside and let them come inside.

"Wow Wilson, you're about to pop," Cristina commented as Jo stepped inside.

"I'm aware, I have three more weeks to go," Jo groaned as she grabbed one of the waters on the counter.

"Yes, and don't make her angry please," Alex whispered to Meredith and Cristina.

"What did you say?" Jo glared at him.

"Nothing honey," he smiled at her.

"You might want to go find the men," Meredith suggested and Alex left before Jo could explode.

"Have you talked to George?" Cristina asked.

"Not in a few weeks. He's in a disclosed location so he can't talk really," Meredith explained.

"I couldn't imagine Owen being gone again, I feel bad for Izzie," Amelia frowned.

"Yeah, well it is what it is. She seems fine with it but really I think it's killing her not to talk to him much like when he first went in," Meredith said. They were talking more and snacking as Ali and Evie's friends were arriving also.

"Are you going to have all eight of these girls spending the night?" Cristina said with wide eyes.

"Sadly. They begged to have a sleepover and Derek agreed to it," Meredith rolled her eyes.

"I would offer to let you come to our house but I think Derek would kill me," Amelia joked.

"We can leave Owen and I'll come with you, balance it out," Meredith laughed. There was one last knock on the door and Meredith went to open it before Lexie opened the door herself with a brown haired baby in her arms. Mark followed behind her.

"Hey Lex, Mark," Meredith smiled hugging both of them.

"Hey, sorry we are late. Sawyer had a late nap so now he's super happy," Lexie smiled as she bounced him on her hip. His face lit up at Meredith and he let out a giggle.

"My precious little nephew, come here to your favorite aunt," Meredith smiled as she took him away from Lexie. He was happily giggling in her arms.

"I think he's growing out of the shy phase now, he hasn't had a fit the last few days," Lexie said as she brushed his hair with her fingers.

"Told you," Meredith joked and Lexie hit her arm.

"Shut up," Lexie laughed.

"Is dad and Susan coming? I know with what happened with Susan's sister is really hitting Susan hard so I understand," Meredith asked.

"Dad said he was, I don't know about mom," Lexie replied. A herd of footsteps came tumbling down the stairs as Evie and Alison's friends all followed them.

"Mommy, is it cake time yet?" Alison asked.

"Not yet, let's wait for papa ok?" Meredith said and they all frowned at the same time.

"Why don't you guys go play in the back yard and I'll yell when it's time," Meredith said and they all hurried outside.

"Where are the guys?" Jo asked.

"Who knows, probably talking about fishing and outdoors," Meredith shrugged.

"Men are weird," Cristina rolled her eyes.

"Hey I'm not that bad," an older mans voice said as he came through the front door.

"Of course not dad," Meredith smiled slightly as she went over and took the present from him, hugging him also.

"How's mom?" Lexie asked him as she hugged him.

"She's doing as best as she can, you know how close she and Mary were. She sends her love to you guys and all the kids," Thatcher smiled lightly then a whole herd of kids came barreling through the house along with all the men. Alison and Everleigh both ran and hugged Thatcher.

"Papa!" They both said as they hugged him.

"Happy birthday girls," he smiled, patting their backs as he held them a second longer than normal.

"Thanks, now can we do cake?" Alison asked.

"Pleasee!" Evie begged.

"Alright, Derek can you get the cake?" She asked him and he nodded as he went to grab it. The kids were at the table, the girls sat next to each other and their friends gathered around them. Derek sat the huge tie-dye cake in front of them and they both lit up as they saw it. Derek lit all ten of the candles and everyone started singing happy birthday as Derek went to stand next to Meredith, putting his arm around her.

"Our girls are growing up," she whispered as she looked up at him.

"All of our kids are growing up," he said back to her.

"Bray isn't allowed to grow up yet," she giggled as she looked at the toddler who just looked up at his sister's.

"Agreed," he chuckled as he kissed the side of her head. Never would he imagine his life being the way it was now. Married to the love of his life with four beautiful children who are all very intelligent and much like their mother. He never thought he would fallen in love with his intern and had an adulteress love child but it was the best thing that had every happened to him.

* * *

 ** _Author's Note: This is it, the very last chapter of this story. I can't believe that we finally made it to Meredith and Derek's happily ever after. I am so grateful for all of you and how great you have been with the reviews and the favorites. I loved reading all the kind words from you all. It has been a rollercoaster writing this but I'm so glad with how it turned out, I wouldn't change a thing. Again, a huge thanks to everyone and a special thanks to Patsy, who never failed to review on every chapter and kept me wanting to write more. Much love to all of you, it's been a wild ride._**

 ** _P.S. I am currently trying to brainstorm and come up with a good plot for my next story and I'm not sure when I will start writing it, but when I do I will post it as soon as possible._**


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